I don’t have a soulmate child or one that turned me into a lesbian, so I’m very unripe with these matters and not the best at mothering like our Slops who was a mother even before she had children
and therefore am taking a wild stab in the dark but…
I reckon if your 6 year old says she wants to ‘break up with you’ and asks you to ‘make a break up video’, there are a few things you could do before agreeing? I don’t know, maybe like… ask her why she wants to break up with you, listen to what she says and respond appropriately.
Or better yet, look inwardly to yourself with your primo self-awareness and knowing yourself skills to reflect on your parenting and make some improvements. You know, put your child’s needs before your own and actually spend quality time together instead of ditching her to chase your ex with your golden child/ soulmate/feminist son…
Even if you do agree to the video because that’s what she really wants to do, maybe don’t put your massive ego on display, don’t be competing with her, pulling disgusted faces and standing in prime position in front of the camera eye-
bleeping yourself … and if you get to this point, maybe don’t post it to socials or preface it with a story where you have such disdain for your child, where the subtext screams ‘how dare she want to break up with me, I am the selfless mother of all selfless mothers and she is WRONG. And all I want to do is play scrabble with my son.’
Am I ready to be crowned worst mother of the year for having these values? Someone? Anyone? Help!