Slopalong #3 She doesn't understand beans

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Salmonshirt

This just fills me with rage again that Jack is recommending this to people who have little money to spend. It’s infuriating. Just an utter waste of money and food (not by you tenderstem).

also these dogs have made my day.
 
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Lazarus

Lazarus

Salmonshirt said:
This just fills me with rage again that Jack is recommending this to people who have little money to spend. It’s infuriating. Just an utter waste of money and food (not by you tenderstem).

also these dogs have made my day.
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I don’t think anyone would disagree with you, but the Slopalong threads are, IMO, an excellent public health warning and the funniest pages on the whole internet.
 
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Salmonshirt

Lazarus said:
I don’t think anyone would disagree with you, but the Slopalong threads are, IMO, an excellent public health warning and the funniest pages on the whole internet.
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Oh yes Laz, I agree. Apologies, I’m not well (SEVERELY) (not really severely) and think I’m in a bit of a grump 😂
 
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HotesTilaire

HotesTilaire

Salmonshirt said:
This just fills me with rage again that Jack is recommending this to people who have little money to spend. It’s infuriating. Just an utter waste of money and food (not by you tenderstem).

also these dogs have made my day.
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To be fair I think people with little money to spend are “marked safe” from this recipe with its (surprising, consensual) range of ingredients and the “low and slow” cooking, you’d just make a curry and have the muscles another day IRL.

But Jack does give us all the rage from time to time. Today it was your turn. And poor MollyBongo’s.
 
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F

Foxvint

allybongo said:
Dudes and frauens. The day has come. I have maketh the pear and mussel abomination. I know I promised this weeks ago, but in keeping with our Jackie - I do like an empty promise and a vague indication that things are in the pipeline. See Jacinda/Eels/Granola etc etc.

I'm actually off work sick - was planning on going back tomorrow but now may need an appointment with occy health first.

Ok. So it started with the original post. Bearing in mind there was no 'official' recipe so I was flying blind.

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I started with assembling the ingredients.
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My first thought was that I didn't know how to caramelise a pear so I took to google
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The majority of the internet seemed to recommend brown sugar and cinnamon - but I took the bold assumption that this would have no place in a savoury dish. i settled for butter.
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Everything got boiled, caramelised and blitzed. Apart from a few leeks I set aside as the original photo appeared to have whole ones nestling alongside the mussels and spuds.
Oh, i forgot to add the chickpeas so that was a late addition.
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Time to assemble. There were no instructions if the mussels should be hot or cold. I mean I'm a lunatic but even i couldn't eat cold pickled mussels. There was no guidance on type of mustard so I just chose a random one from my cupboard. It was a hot one I bought from the local Polski supermarket because I liked the jar it was in.
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Time to serve!
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I'm so sorry lads after the build-up and excitement. i just couldn't do it. I couldn't even try it. So I offered it to Molly.
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She actually growled at it I kid you not. This hound eats anything and everything.
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Her bro just looked her agog that she even went near it. Again - he is a literal hungry caterpillar.

So sadly it has gone outside in the food bin which the foxes will probably rob. I'll be having the last laugh then tonight you foxy guys. I will donate every spare penny I have this month to my local food bank. That was a crime against food and humanity.
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Absolutely glorious 🤣

Dogs scran each other's arses but won't touch her food.
 
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Nonah

Nonah

Ok I *might* take one for the team and try something vegan. Has anyone still got the links to the “recipes” and what’s already been done? I always said I never would but if I happen to find myself at a loose end…
 
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Notmycat

Notmycat

Nonah said:
Ok I *might* take one for the team and try something vegan. Has anyone still got the links to the “recipes” and what’s already been done? I always said I never would but if I happen to find myself at a loose end…
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https://tattle.life/wiki/slopalong/ knock yourself out. @Nonah - there is a list of the book recipes from Vegan-ish and I'll copy any recipes you want. Further down that page is a table of everything we made in the slopalong
 
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Nonah

Nonah

I actually can’t see what could go wrong here. I’ll get the bits I’m missing and give it a go this weekend.
 
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Darvos

Darvos

Nonah said:
I actually can’t see what could go wrong here. I’ll get the bits I’m missing and give it a go this weekend.
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Less than a year ago The Queen of Guardian forensic food testing, Felicity Cloake, used guest’s as one of the vegan meringue recipes she tested: https://www.archive.is/oldest/https...erfect-vegan-meringues-recipe-felicity-cloake
Worth a read as there is big chickpea/bean fighting talk. Also, although FC goes with a mix of icing and caster sugars she doesn’t choose to blitz the two together. It’s almost as though doing so would reduce the structure of the caster sugars, which is the reason for using it in the first place.

Could I make a request for science? guest says to line the tray with baking parchment or brush with oil. We all know that oil is death to normal, egg meringues but guest, unusual for her forensic self, makes no mention of this or that it is different for aquafaba meringues. I didn’t find another mention to oiling the tray for aquafaba meringues elsewhere, Felicity certainly doesn’t. For science, dear @Nonah could you oil the tray of at least some?
 
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