Dear Diary,
I’ve been lying to you. Lying by omission.
Before we get into the lying stuff (so reddy-yellow, I know!) I have to tell you about the trolls. Sinead asked for some feedback on “Surrounded by Twats” and someone actually had the gall to do it!!!! My leggings fell right out of my camel toe when I saw it! The fecking cheek! Sinead was crying in her room because the constructive and completely objective & justified comments were so cruel (actually, sorry, no... she was asleep and oblivious, but it’s the same thing) ... I was at the end of a 65 hour day as I had been busy with my fake app, and as a good friend I jumped in to defend her. It turned into a
mass debate (something I don’t do, ever), and I showed those trolls what’s what. This one girl had set up a fake profile just to troll me (the same one who’s been doing it for the last 72 years) and said she had years of education on the topic. I’m calling bullshit. No one knows psychology better than me . Except Sinead. But she doesn’t have a qualification and is therefore a lesser person than me by default. I managed to get a little dig at her too Diary... you would have been proud 🥲
I had to do an email to my mailing list just in case people see what the trolls say and realise that everything they say is correct, and that I’m in fact a massive fraud
Dodged a bullet Diary, TG. I live to shite another day.
In other news, I was forced against my will to do a photoshoot for My-OHtein.
duck sake. They just wanted Sinead on her own but I said no way... we come as a package or not at all. I really had a great time doing it. I don’t feel remotely awkward or insecure standing next to the Beg and we don’t resent anything about each other at all. I even showed everyone how to do some (a) burpee!
Just in case the abject hatred between myself and Sinead was obvious, we agreed to do a podcast to keep Brand Oh-Beg alive. Her people talked to my people (who are the same people) to set it up. I like to think of us as the Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan of the #fitfam
but I would never tell anyone except you, dear Diary.
Really not much else going on besides my passive acceptance of my clear unhappiness by leaving Bali and going to Portugal. I love keeping people on their toes - no one ever knows what my next move is going to be
I thought people would say negative things about me traveling for non-essential reasons during a pandemic on a First Class flight from a financially decimated country but CHECK OUT THE INSTA COMMENTS!! EVERYONE LOVES AUL SHIV!!
Until next time Dear Diary. LOLs and YOLO. Xx
there are no words for what the future of these two faces or any other exposed body parts for that matter. And shiv if you’re on reading this is not unsolicited advice. It’s a message to cop the duck on
. Jesus the whole family don’t know how to take care of themselves 
.
bravo 