Scousebird blogs #8 Desperate posts and crimes against roasts.

[Blair-Waldorf]

New thread DABs!!! Thanks to our @SpiceWeasel for this smashing suggestion. Had to shorten it a bit. Go and pour yourself a nice glass of turps gin and tonic and get yourself cosy and warm in a nice bon marche number

can someone do the TLDR please I’m off to cook me sausages in the dishwasher, I’m doing mr Bella sossy and mash for his tea with a few cheeky green giants on the side

 

[Beepbeepfiat500]

New thread DABs!!! Thanks to our @SpiceWeasel for this smashing suggestion. Had to shorten it a bit. Go and pour yourself a nice glass of turps gin and tonic and get yourself cosy with a nice bon marche number

can someone do the TLDR please I’m off to cook me sausages in the dishwasher, I’m doing mr Bella sossy and mash for his tea with a few cheeky green giants on the side

you little belter you! @SpiceWeasel you’ve made it!!

 

[SpiceWeasel]

New thread DABs!!! Thanks to our @SpiceWeasel for this smashing suggestion. Had to shorten it a bit. Go and pour yourself a nice glass of turps gin and tonic and get yourself cosy and warm in a nice bon marche number

can someone do the TLDR please I’m off to cook me sausages in the dishwasher, I’m doing mr Bella sossy and mash for his tea with a few cheeky green giants on the side

Omg my first thread title thanks DABs am made up!

 

[Blair-Waldorf]

Omg my first thread title thanks DABs am made up!

Proud of u girl you’re climbing the tattle ranks I said this on the kate hayes thread coz I got made VIP the other days I would feel a bleep spending so much time on here but why should I it’s fuckin hilarious

 

[Beepbeepfiat500]

My fella said the other night who do you keep texting and laughing at??! Errrrrr....my friends in my phone pal

 

[SpiceWeasel]

My fella said the other night who do you keep texting and laughing at??! Errrrrr....my friends in my phone pal

My fella is the same

Although I always laugh cos am always doing proper little house on the prairie activities like sewing whilst discussing scranning arse etc

 

[chipstick]

My fella said the other night who do you keep texting and laughing at??! Errrrrr....my friends in my phone pal

This has proper made me lol

I really hope there's an equivalent Tattle contributor site for iNfLuEnZaS so Steph and Sadsack Rowe can have as much joy bitching about us

 

[SpiceWeasel]

Looks like my title has been shortened soz ladies.

 

[Yerma]

My fella said the other night who do you keep texting and laughing at??! Errrrrr....my friends in my phone pal

I was going to comment a while ago saying I feel like we’re friends and not even in a sad way like Steph cos we obviously have non internet friends too.

 

[Blair-Waldorf]

Looks like my title has been shortened soz ladies.

What a bleeping Liberty

 

[SpiceWeasel]

What a bleeping Liberty

I feel violated

 

[oczymlody]

Recap time bishes

So,
-Steph is officially moving to Church Street, (piss alley) to a shop, WITH A BASEMENT (that stinks) and used to have that woman outside on a mic like ‘YA CAN GET YER KARENNN MILLEN FOR A TENNERRRRR’ (alllll the stolen goods)
-#wherescora? In the basement???
-Stephs been to approximately 10,000 local supermarkets in search of garlic fry light, cos Yano, duck Covid
-Steph is keeping her shop open in lockdown #2 cos Yano, duck Covid
-Steph has been to her exes mums about 15 times in the last month to get her hair lightened and to eat a roast with raw looking sausages on, cos Yano, duck Covid
-Tattlers are becoming concerned for the health of steph’s fake lashes, cos she never gets a wash and #lashmites
-Steph is so busy in the shop she’s hired 2 new DABS!!! (Pending approval)
-She can’t make her mind up if CBD gummies bears cure hangovers or not?? Jury’s out on that, but they DEFFO DO cure period pains
-Steph had the house that taste forgot #gifted decorated for Xmas, looks quite dangerous on her ombré stairs, but she only lives in her bed anyway

Dictonary:
DAB- Dusty arsed witches (name Steph gave us and we wear with pride)
#wherescora - hashtag coined to search for stephs daughter, who never seems to be with her
Rimming- as a part of her quirky and cool edge Steph likes to claim she enjoys eating arse on the regular.
-Sniper Position- The position that she gets into to scran hoop

To note-
-Steph made fun of Claudia winkleman and proudly has it in her bio as it made TV
-Steph made a joke out of Caroline Flack but when she died called for trolls to be jailed
-Steph used to have the circle of show which publicly shamed girls for their clothing choices. But was fuming when the Daily Mail photographed her, didn’t know who she was and she belonged in her own circle of show
-Breaking lockdown by going to her mates constantly for food etc, though #fuckthetories
-Claims to hate the tories but seems to have voted for them in the past and uses questionable business tactics to make ‘a million turnover’

 

[Melj71]

@Beepbeepfiat500 I think I’m showing my age.

 

[Tomi2015]

@Beepbeepfiat500 I think I’m showing my age. View attachment 308486

Double Deckers are life

 

[Doll-Parts]

Congrats @SpiceWeasel
I can't wait for my turn!

 

[Tomi2015]

bleeping hell!! Who is rent-a-vagina after now?
And who the duck uses the word fancy. That’s what you said when you were 10 years old and everyone in the class liked that little bastard who was good looking and he knew it

 

[Sosig]

Congrats @SpiceWeasel
I can't wait for my turn!

There’s a December thread with your name on it

I didn’t get involved in the thread suggestions so see below for an arse waiting to be scranned

( * )

 

[Beepbeepfiat500]

@Beepbeepfiat500 I think I’m showing my age. View attachment 308486

I’m not far behind you I only ever eat the top bit anyway...the bottom bit tastes like hospitals

bleeping hell!! Who is rent-a-vagina after now?
And who the duck uses the word fancy. That’s what you said when you were 10 years old and everyone in the class liked that little bastard who was good looking and he knew it

rent a vagina -actually howling

 

[SoggyWeather]

Recap time bishes

So,
-Steph is officially moving to Church Street, (piss alley) to a shop, WITH A BASEMENT (that stinks) and used to have that woman outside on a mic like ‘YA CAN GET YER KARENNN MILLEN FOR A TENNERRRRR’ (alllll the stolen goods)
-#wherescora? In the basement???
-Stephs been to approximately 10,000 local supermarkets in search of garlic fry light, cos Yano, duck Covid
-Steph is keeping her shop open in lockdown #2 cos Yano, duck Covid
-Steph has been to her exes mums about 15 times in the last month to get her hair lightened and to eat a roast with raw looking sausages on, cos Yano, duck Covid
-Tattlers are becoming concerned for the health of steph’s fake lashes, cos she never gets a wash and #lashmites
-Steph is so busy in the shop she’s hired 2 new DABS!!! (Pending approval)
-She can’t make her mind up if CBD gummies bears cure hangovers or not?? Jury’s out on that, but they DEFFO DO cure period pains
-Steph had the house that taste forgot #gifted decorated for Xmas, looks quite dangerous on her ombré stairs, but she only lives in her bed anyway

Dictonary:
DAB- Dusty arsed witches (name Steph gave us and we wear with pride)
#wherescora - hashtag coined to search for stephs daughter, who never seems to be with her
Rimming- as a part of her quirky and cool edge Steph likes to claim she enjoys eating arse on the regular.
-Sniper Position- The position that she gets into to scran hoop

To note-
-Steph made fun of Claudia winkleman and proudly has it in her bio as it made TV
-Steph made a joke out of Caroline Flack but when she died called for trolls to be jailed
-Steph used to have the circle of show which publicly shamed girls for their clothing choices. But was fuming when the Daily Mail photographed her, didn’t know who she was and she belonged in her own circle of show
-Breaking lockdown by going to her mates constantly for food etc, though #fuckthetories
-Claims to hate the tories but seems to have voted for them in the past and uses questionable business tactics to make ‘a million turnover’

She deffo voted Tory 8 years ago when they got back in. Fact.

 

[SpiceWeasel]

I feel like I’ve blighted this thread soz DABs