Scousebird Blogs #12 The shop is an offy but no one even buys her coffee

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Helpmeout

Why does this all sound like it would make a really fucking weird but hilarious sitcom? Jeffs character played by Charity Shop Sue with rose gold extensions in, the swinging pilot and his wife in a cage, Ma Cureton, Mazi Bonita and the crystal ball, NMH and the everlasting legs. Anyone else?
 
Reactions: 17

OliveOil2020

Did anyone get onto the stories today about how good it is to be in town and have somewhere nice to go for lunch that isn’t greggs This is the same person that’s preached about “Cerrrr-rosbeee village” and all the independents round there since she moved to the area

As for that pink hair, all I can see is Lisa from
Steps.
 

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Reactions: 15

Babygirlie21

Hobbit that mopes around like a really shit eeyore talkin politics smack every fuckin episode like Alf Garnett
 
Reactions: 5

Beepbeepfiat500

Jesus Christ I wasn’t getting notifications and just had to catch up 3 pages........it’s escalated quickly I see!!!? BEST DAY EVER!!!!!
 
Reactions: 15
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TheGhostofShirleyBallas

Can you imagine it: Jeff making some pink hot choc with REAL chocolate flakes in, waiting for her friend to come round. The camera pans over her shoulder to show a giant pair of legs walk past the kitchen window...
 
Reactions: 16
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Helpmeout

TheGhostofShirleyBallas said:
Can you imagine it: Jeff making some pink hot choc with REAL chocolate flakes in, waiting for her friend to come round. The camera pans over her shoulder to show a giant pair of legs walk past the kitchen window...
Click to expand...
Meanwhile Mazis getting the tarot cards set up at the table, the smell of Ma Curetons Big Mac Pasta™ is wafting through the kitchen.
 
Reactions: 14

Babygirlie21

TheGhostofShirleyBallas said:
Can you imagine it: Jeff making some pink hot choc with REAL chocolate flakes in, waiting for her friend to come round. The camera pans over her shoulder to show a giant pair of legs walk past the kitchen window...
Click to expand...
I just laughed so hard at this
"Come on in NMH, watch ya don't twat ya head on me high Toy Story ceiiiiiiling on ya way in"
"Just makin me tea, garlic frylight SURPRISE SURPRIIIIIIISE......the surprise is it has zero nutritional value and looks like somethin me ex-cat sicked up, ya want some hun?"
 
Reactions: 12

Beepbeepfiat500

But look at me spice rack in me kitchen that looks like big bird swallowed a grenade
 
Reactions: 10
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TJ90

I’m keep looking at my dog’s cage and laughing. What the actual fuck
 
Reactions: 12
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Yerma

I need to know if it was an actual dog size cage or a one a human can stand in. I don’t know why I’m even asking now
 
Reactions: 10

Babygirlie21

She was 36 in that pic?? AND she looked like that WITH freezy face juice on the regular??
I would have asked for me money back!
Fuck knows what they were fillin her face with but it clearly wasn't the good shit.
 
Reactions: 12

Beepbeepfiat500

Babygirlie21 said:
She was 36 in that pic?? AND she looked like that WITH freezy face juice on the regular??
I would have asked for me money back!
Fuck knows what they were fillin her face with but it clearly wasn't the good shit.
Click to expand...
Probably what mr Cornell was splaffing in the bowl (sorry)
 
Reactions: 10
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