I posted yesterday that I'd took valium because I felt unwell. Reading about the case made me feel horrible and there were specific parts of the trial that triggered me yesterday. There was no cheering here on this thread, by me or anyone else. At all. And I said I'd give anything to be a fly on the wall because it was hard to get a full picture through transcripts, I said I wished the trial were televised because we were missing a lot of body language. I'm deaf so maybe I place more importance on non verbal cues than most people. Please don't misrepresent me - you've made it sound like people were having a party here. That absolutely wasn't the case. Don't gaslight me, I won't sit here and let that happen to me ever again.
After court finished yesterday a lot of us here went a little off topic and shared our own experiences of DV, coercive control and damage we'd suffered at the hands of narcs. I cried reading some of the stories here. I felt that yesterday afternoon people on this thread who had no experience of these things got a real insight into these subjects.
Today I come on here and it seems back to square one "I gEt She WaS aBuSEd, wHy diDn'T sHe JusT LeaVE".
I'll say it again, if you've never experienced coercive control/DV you cannot understand how powerful it is, it skews your rational thinking and sanity.
Very well said, thank you
I also feel that the above post has misrepresented a lot of the regular posters on this thread. A real life example of gaslighting right there in that post. Anyone reading it would think we were all celebrating and whooping when that was not the case at all. Another regular poster was singled out and accused of treating the thread like a soap opera, which this poster was not doing at all. She had merely made a lighthearted remark, as did quite a few of us yesterday to keep things friendly and relatively upbeat considering the subject matter.
I was joking about the useless witness in the pinstripe suit yesterday and even put a photo of a striped 80s suit on the thread to make people smile. As soon as I did it, I had that sinking feeling that someone would come on and tell me off for making jokes in a serious thread. I immediately added a paragraph to my post explaining that I was taking the case very seriously and that sometimes a bit of humour is needed to lighten the mood. I shouldn’t have had to do that but I did because there is always someone waiting to pounce on anyone that behaves or thinks differently to how they think they should. It is exhausting and unnecessary.
These threads have been great so far due to a group of mainly fair minded posters who listen to others and contribute their own opinions. People have been sharing views and their own personal experiences. I have genuinely learned a lot about court procedures, narcissism, and coercive control. It has been very educational and, despite the harrowing subject matter, I have enjoyed reading and posting in these threads. I sincerely hope we can we continue in this vein and not let any blow-ins from FB cause disruption and petty squabbles. These threads are such a refreshing change from those in FB, which are filled with swearing, insults, accusations, lies, and downright false information.
