Ruby Granger #37 You can still get one while you can

[StatusWoe]

Thanks to @Griftwood for the thread title. These are Ruby's own words, from an Instagram post where she's attempting to sell her unwanted stationery. Some things never change.

Recap:

Ruby appears to have ditched her part-time school job and is currently on a skiing holiday. She can't ski and has already crashed into someone, but she remains an unstoppable force on the slopes. The self-styled 'Vegan Marshmallow' is happy as long as other people are paying for the trips. Thoughts and prayers are with @Ilaariaa who has left her city in order to escape Ski-bee, menace of the slopes.

In other news, Ruby has been plaguing public speaking events all across the country. No region is safe from her waffle. She's also been producing new and exciting content on social media. This includes: moving her single bed, wearing hats, listing her favourite months, listing her favourite weather types, asking followers about their favourite months, asking followers about their favourite weather types. Is it MIST or is it RAIN or is it SUN or is it SNOW or is it MAGENTA GREEN? We're on the edge of our seats here.

@LostGhosts has been kind enough to recap Erimentha Parker's To-Do List. These recaps have highlighted a deeply unsettling link between Erimentha Parker and Patrick Bateman. The book is full of jarring anatomical detail such as the the optics of rodents, the piercing orbs of bullies, 'sallow epithelial tissue', seizing epiglottises, carpal bones, finger pads and other frightening physical features.

Ruby's sister, Martha, says 'she has lost touch with reality'.
One of Ruby's followers comments on her lip smacking habit: 'it's quite loud and constant'.

Tattlers are still waiting for the results of her Oxford application. Nothing's been confirmed yet.

 

[DrinaM]

Love the thread title, thank you @StatusWoe for the re-cap.

I wanted to say thank you to @LostGhosts for sharing highlights from the Erimentha nightmare text that Roob put out into the world. Roobadoo's most recent poem is proof that she has not grown much as a writer. The irony of her prancing about on a ski holiday in Italy, writing a poem on said holiday. A poem that attempts to critique consumerism and tourism.

Waiting for the Oxford news. Its got to be soon, right?

 

[Theonefromspace3]

Oh yay another I got paid to post this type of post. Do you think ruby is experiencing amnesia and forgot there are posts she can make that don't sell anything?

While I'm bilingual English is still secondarily acquired, but that first sentence just does not... feel right

Also the irony of this screening to be on this day.

What's with these words for heavens sake. Stop putting pages out of the thesaurus into your newspaper looking porridge please Ruby.

---

Oh yay another I got paid to post this type of post. Do you think ruby is experiencing amnesia and forgot there are posts she can make that don't sell anything?

While I'm bilingual English is still secondarily acquired, but that first sentence just does not... feel right

Also the irony of this screening to be on this day.

What's with these words for heavens sake. Stop putting pages out of the thesaurus into your newspaper looking porridge please Ruby.

Oh I see it is a favourite of the day

 

[StatusWoe]

Lol, I saw that comment earlier but had no desire to wade into the Thatcher debate.

I can't imagine Ruby would be interested in 'You' if it wasn't a gifted screening. That's the serial killer series, right? I saw snippets of it on Gogglebox and it seemed a bit like Dexter. Surely our Roobs would be offended by all the violence and sex? It's very different to Malory Towers. Though it does fit in with the Erimentha-is-Patrick-Bateman idea.

 

[Deeznutslol]

View attachment 2014964

Oh yay another I got paid to post this type of post. Do you think ruby is experiencing amnesia and forgot there are posts she can make that don't sell anything?

While I'm bilingual English is still secondarily acquired, but that first sentence just does not... feel right

Also the irony of this screening to be on this day.

What's with these words for heavens sake. Stop putting pages out of the thesaurus into your newspaper looking porridge please Ruby.
View attachment 2014965
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Oh I see it is a favourite of the day View attachment 2014969

‘Decided not to include her because she’s so contentious’…
How about, don’t include her because she was a massive bleep who caused untold misery to millions of lives?

 

[LostGhosts]

Love the thread title, thank you @StatusWoe for the re-cap.

I wanted to say thank you to @LostGhosts for sharing highlights from the Erimentha nightmare text that Roob put out into the world. Roobadoo's most recent poem is proof that she has not grown much as a writer. The irony of her prancing about on a ski holiday in Italy, writing a poem on said holiday. A poem that attempts to critique consumerism and tourism.

Waiting for the Oxford news. Its got to be soon, right?

Aww thank you! I will be uploading more chapters soon. Started working back at the hospital on Monday which has killed me a bit but this weekend with be Erimetha Parker galore

 

[bananapeel]

With regard to the white gifted dress that was mentioned at the end of the last thread, do you remember this very similar one (now on her Depop page)

"only worn once for a Cottagecore video"

And there is another

Spoiler: ED discussion

"look this fit me when I was 12 and still fits me now!":

 

[bookworm39]

‘Decided not to include her because she’s so contentious’…
How about, don’t include her because she was a massive bleep who caused untold misery to millions of lives?

Mind Frankie Boyle talking about the cost of her funeral? After reading your comment I just had to go and watch this video again! [/QUOTE]

 

[Daredevil]

 

[theMoth]

With regard to the white gifted dress that was mentioned at the end of the last thread, do you remember this very similar one (now on her Depop page)

View attachment 2015088
"only worn once for a Cottagecore video"

And there is another

Spoiler: ED discussion

"look this fit me when I was 12 and still fits me now!": View attachment 2015095

wasn't the dress from this Etsy store "gifted"?
I mean, it's totally okay to give away items you got for free. Better than just throw them into the bin. It's even okay to sell the things if you needed the money. But Ruby doesn't need the money. It would be so much kinder to give the things she gets for free to charity shops. But Ruby doesn't donate things as we know.

 

[Ilaariaa]

‘Decided not to include her because she’s so contentious’…
How about, don’t include her because she was a massive bleep who caused untold misery to millions of lives?

Also, "she was actually quite nice" sounds like she was personable and cordial when in reality she was generally considered a controlling, despotic witch even by the people who worked with her and agreed with her politics lol.

 

[gossip_guy]

Lol, I saw that comment earlier but had no desire to wade into the Thatcher debate.

I can't imagine Ruby would be interested in 'You' if it wasn't a gifted screening. That's the serial killer series, right? I saw snippets of it on Gogglebox and it seemed a bit like Dexter. Surely our Roobs would be offended by all the violence and sex? It's very different to Malory Towers. Though it does fit in with the Erimentha-is-Patrick-Bateman idea.

I think she just got confused when her manager told her about the screening.

Ruby's Manager: "Ruby, just a heads up we need you to attend a Q&A discussion of You."
Ruby: "Oiy LOVE ME! OIY'M MOIY FAVOURITE SOBJACKT! How long will moiy speech be?"
Ruby's Manager: "No, you won't be speaking, it's for You."
Ruby: "Ahh, yass, off cwoarse, oiy see. Syo what celabbritties will be twalking about me instadd? Amma Watsyon, Jyacobb Ryees Mwogg and that garrl from Anne with an E?"
Ruby's Manager: "What? No. Look, it's a Q&A for the TV series You on Netflix starring Penn Badgely!"
Ruby: "They myade a shyow about me and gwot a garrl nyamed Pann Badgely to plyay me?! THAT'S SYO PARRFACKT! OIY LOVV PANS AND BADGES! Althyough oiy rilly think oiy shold have plyayed moiysalf."
Ruby's Manager: "No, look, it's a show about a serial killer."
Ruby: "Oiy syee. Whal oiy haven't killed annyone yat, and oiy awhlsyo rad the DSM chacklist whan oiy was TWALVE and am JANUINELY nwot a psoycypwaahth. Boht oiy syuppose oiy could troiy matthod acting."
Ruby's Manager: "Listen, we just need you to go to a screening of a show you've never watched and never will, then keep lying about how you watch and love it."
Ruby: "Now THAT oiy can dyoo."

 

[cherry01]

about Oxford , my friend applied for English 1900-present/ lit MA course but heard back just under 2 weeks ago (didn't get a spot sadly.) so I think ruby must know by now. imo she can't have got in, she hid the fact she applied to start with as she prob wanted to avoid potential public rejection again but there's no way she'd keep her mouth shut after an offer, I think the holiday was pre planned as either celebration or pick me up

 

[VallegGirl]

I think she just got confused when her manager told her about the screening.

Ruby's Manager: "Ruby, just a heads up we need you to attend a Q&A discussion of You."
Ruby: "Oiy LOVE ME! OIY'M MOIY FAVOURITE SOBJACKT! How long will moiy speech be?"
Ruby's Manager: "No, you won't be speaking, it's for You."
Ruby: "Ahh, yass, off cwoarse, oiy see. Syo what celabbritties will be twalking about me instadd? Amma Watsyon, Jyacobb Ryees Mwogg and that garrl from Anne with an E?"
Ruby's Manager: "What? No. Look, it's a Q&A for the TV series You on Netflix starring Penn Badgely!"
Ruby: "They myade a shyow about me and gwot a garrl nyamed Pann Badgely to plyay me?! THAT'S SYO PARRFACKT! OIY LOVV PANS AND BADGES! Althyough oiy rilly think oiy shold have plyayed moiysalf."
Ruby's Manager: "No, look, it's a show about a serial killer."
Ruby: "Oiy syee. Whal oiy haven't killed annyone yat, and oiy awhlsyo rad the DSM chacklist whan oiy was TWALVE and am JANUINELY nwot a psoycypwaahth. Boht oiy syuppose oiy could troiy matthod acting."
Ruby's Manager: "Listen, we just need you to go to a screening of a show you've never watched and never will, then keep lying about how you watch and love it."
Ruby: "Now THAT oiy can dyoo."

This is sooo funny. @gossip_guy You, unlike the Rubesker, are a very skilled writer snd always have me giggling.

 

[ECH]

about Oxford , my friend applied for English 1900-present/ lit MA course but heard back just under 2 weeks ago (didn't get a spot sadly.) so I think ruby must know by now. imo she can't have got in, she hid the fact she applied to start with as she prob wanted to avoid potential public rejection again but there's no way she'd keep her mouth shut after an offer, I think the holiday was pre planned as either celebration or pick me up

She would've been bragging about it if she'd got in. I hope she finally gives up now.

 

[StatusWoe]

She seems unusually happy for a person who's just been rejected from their dream university. Posting lots, seeming to be really upbeat. No social media silence or talking about her bad mental health...

This is sooo funny. @gossip_guy You, unlike the Rubesker, are a very skilled writer snd always have me giggling.

Agree! Ruby's 'speech' in that post was as hard to understand as her actual speech.

 

[inyo]

I think getting rejected again would be the best outcome for her personal development, but knowing Ruby she will still cling to the overgrown child lifestyle and the Oxford dream that's not meant to be, so I guess it doesn't matter.

 

[Auga]

I suspect she's just taking her time. She will see this as the vindication she's been waiting five years for if not fifteen. She'll want to be savouring it in the video.

 

[marcelprout]

She seems unusually happy for a person who's just been rejected from their dream university. Posting lots, seeming to be really upbeat. No social media silence or talking about her bad mental health...

That's what has been throwing me off as well because I'd have expected some sort of a life update video by now. Then again, she might be taking her time: once everyone knows about it, the pressure will finally become real.

This might be completely off, but given that she's fantasised about it since she was 11, it's safe to say her expectations of university (and especially Oxford university) life were completely unrealistic. She's already received one dose of reality at Exeter (where the stakes were significantly lower and she got to spend a year studying from home) and by the end of her degree she seemed absolutely miserable. I wouldn't be surprised if she just wanted the recognition of being accepted and finally proven on paper to be good enough, but not actually wanting the whole experience that comes after. I'm sure she'd love to appear as a bookish and knowledge-hungry oxonian academic (or dark/light/whatever acadaymic), but this façade comes with a number of challenges as well. I don't think she's ready to be a small fish in a huge pond (or to not be the smartestest bestest student in the tutorial or to receive some actual criticism on her writing she has to actually acknowledge and implement), and I think that deep down she knows it too.

 

[inyo]

That's what has been throwing me off as well because I'd have expected some sort of a life update video by now. Then again, she might be taking her time: once everyone knows about it, the pressure will finally become real.

This might be completely off, but given that she's fantasised about it since she was 11, it's safe to say her expectations of university (and especially Oxford university) life were completely unrealistic. She's already received one dose of reality at Exeter (where the stakes were significantly lower and she got to spend a year studying from home) and by the end of her degree she seemed absolutely miserable. I wouldn't be surprised if she just wanted the recognition of being accepted and proven on paper to be good enough, but not actually wanting the whole experience that comes after. I'm sure she'd love to appear as a bookish and knowledge-hungry oxonian academic, but this façade comes with a lot of challenges as well. I don't think she's ready to be a small fish in a huge pond and I think that deep down she knows it too.

Even at Exeter she wasn't the big fish in a small pond that she probably imagined herself being. Other people got higher grades spending less than half the time she did studying, simply because they were bright and had a genuine interest in literature. You're completely right that she'll sink even further at Oxford than she did at Exeter. Definitely wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't make it to the end of the course or if she comes out with a merit or a pass rather than the distinction that she's probably expecting (if she's been accepted).