PTWM #127 Gucci Gucci coo, Seb trolled you

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New thread title thanks to @Saltypopcorn ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰ some knock-off Gucci flip flops and a dress made out of an old towel are on their way to you, you'll have to provide your own tit tape though as we don't have a never ending pot of PayPal cash ๐Ÿ˜‰

Last thread recap:
- Rancho is still an absolute bleep.
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- after the pretend drama of getting a bird out of a travel cage and into the aviary, off went Rambo to get Wilby out of bed (who's still in a cot with sides on, and drinking a bottle of milk). She played with a muslin cloth, but unfortunately thinks that "high" and "down" are opposites. Bestselling author, everyone!
- BeKind drove Raq to "work", obviously the phone was shoved in her face to record it for posterity. Then she missed the turning, and Racket made a big deal of "we've only got 8 minutes to get to work" like the tat shop urgently needs to open at 10am on the dot ๐Ÿ™„ there was a bag hanging on the door, and she said "let's hope it's a donation and not a troll leaving me a bag of dog tit". RENT FREE! Also, not sure what she thinks people might donate to a shop selling overpriced rubbish ๐Ÿคท
- Rango couldn't work the till, and had to get Emily in with a screwdriver, and the rest of the Snatchwork girls on facetime.
- it obviously wasn't busy in the launderette, because Emily was hanging around the shop, pretending to be a customer and asking the price of things (top tip Random - people are more likely to buy tit if it's priced up). Ratchet told Emily and Betsy that if they were real customers she'd ring Joyce and ask them to leave. Betsy wandered around the shop mumbling about what she might buy, she didn't seem interested when Rampart asked her about the jumpers though!
- back at the Patchwork Hamster Cage House, Sloshua was cooking a roast (of course) and Seb was trying to show him his veins. Bestselling author Rancho said "Seb's bin gym again" ๐Ÿ˜ฌ speak English, woman! Two different types of gravy, but neither were being made in the special gravy pan that she paid ยฃ39 for "because she can".
- Arsetrid posted a story that Ramble hadn't put away the plants and doormat outside the tat shop, OF COURSE Raq's caption said "blame Betsy" ๐Ÿ™„
- dots of doom up in the loft, with Seb lurking in the background. He said there was melted Lindor in the bed ๐Ÿคท Rawhide asked if he knew she's 40 next week, he said "yeah, you're going away. I've got my exams while you're away in Barbados". So despite the fact that for MONTHS she has been complaining that Seb is probably going to fail his GCSEs, they're pissing off and leaving him just as he starts them. Because Rancho's need for attention surpasses everything else in that shitshow house. She got excited at the thought of going to Barbados, and said that Joyce has booked for them to go away but she doesn't know where, but he has renewed their passports (conveniently forgetting that she recently said they'd renewed everyone's because they're going on a family holiday this summer). Then she launched into showing a load more tat for the shop, tut tut Rambo, they should be marked as #ad. Seb was in the background talking to Betsy on speakerphone. Then after he'd hung up he was trying to talk to her about some stuff on depop, she just kept telling him to go away, until she lost her rag and snarled ๐Ÿคฌ while wearing a t-shirt which said "do good things". What, like basically telling your stepson to piss off because you're busy flogging crap to strangers online? So good! She even yelled "the baby's asleep" at one point. What's that, Wilby's in bed at a sensible time instead of roaming the house eating crisps and doughnuts? First time for everything! She showed a personal alarm, and went off on a debate with herself over whether to open it or not. She pulled out the battery tab, and expected it to go off, then pressed the button for the torch. When she FINALLY worked out how to make it go off, by "giving it one of them", of course, she then set it off about 5 times. Edie was next up the stepladder stairs, and was straight into a little stationery box, saying "I want this one, can I have it". Then she set off the personal alarm twice, which Racket laughed at.
- Rambo is running an online raffle, with the prizes kindly donated by other people (so yet again, getting people to donate stuff and then reaping the cash for herself). However the terms are confusing - on the website, in one place it says "all money" is going back into the CIC, in another it says "all profits". There is a difference Ratshit, which is it?
- at the next women's centre, weirdo Jeremy turned up. He must be rubbing his hands together with glee, he keeps renting shithole buildings out to Ratchet, and she keeps doing them up out of her stash of stolen money. Definitely something dodgy going on there.
- Wilby's in his trawler fishing outfit again.
- she's taking the kids to get passport photos done, ready for their family holiday in a couple of months. Despite saying weeks ago that they were renewing all the passports.
- Rambo's had a spray tan, and uploaded a photo of herself lifting her dress with no knickers on to show it off. Normal.
- Patreon spies kindly shared some screenshots of Rancho getting ready for a "birthday tea", wearing a bizarre velvety, bright pink dress that only vaguely covered her boobs and vulva ๐Ÿ˜ฌ yet again proving that you simply can't buy class.
- turns out it wasn't a birthday tea after all, but a surprise party (did Ratchet mention it's her 40th soon?). Arsetrid was there, and Knee Deep, plus all of "the circle" - except Stabby Jo. None of the kids were invited, apart from Betsy.
- photos and videos emerged from the party of the year, and showed Racquet being hideously cringey as she pretended to be the most fun ever. Dancing around on the furniture, kissing and biting everyone (including Knee Deep's boobs), and Mannah's husband picking her up by putting his head between her legs so her thrush bucket was on the back of his neck ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ Knee Deep posted that she'd leave her husband for Hannah ๐Ÿคท when Random walked in to the "surprise" party, she was holding hands with Lianne ๐Ÿง looks like Stabby's been fully replaced in the attic sex games ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
- the day after, Rancho was off out for lunch with "the girls", including Joyce. Imagine being so insecure that you can't go out for a couple of hours without worrying that your spineless husband is slinging his sausage up someone else ๐Ÿคท
- a Tattler found the dress online for $300. All that money to look like you're trying to cover your modesty in a kid's size dressing gown ๐Ÿคท it looked very different on the model, Rambo obviously styled it differently to match the crack head Barbie look she was going for. Nailed it, hun!
- The Snatchwork employees clubbed together to get her a birthday present. A pair of Gucci flip flops that cost ยฃ435. Relatable Ratchet strikes again. Seven people were shown in the celebratory photo, which works out at just over ยฃ60 each. Quite a lot to spend on your boss, unless she's paying you a hell of a lot more than your job is actually worth, of course.
- she shared a load of photos and videos from her "surprise" party (that clearly wasn't a surprise - getting a spray tan, hair and make up done, and wearing a dress that basically showed EVERYTHING off to go out for a meal? Ok hun ๐Ÿคท). She made a point of saying that two of her "adopted dads" were there, yet neither her mum nor Gangsta Granny was there. Shy, quiet Charleeeee (with the lips, tits and arse) who's so conscious of her body was in a skin tight outfit, doing a Tina Turner impression like the little wallflower she is. Lots of cringey dancing and showing off for the camera (which was of course permanently in Rambo's hand). Apparently someone showed a piercing in the toilets ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
- the alarm is set for 4.31 am to go to the airport. Remind us again that you're leaving your toddler who's so aggressive and uncontrollable, and your stepson who's literally starting his GCSEs.
- 5.15am and they're getting in the car ready to go. No kids to wave them off, and assuming Wilby's still asleep so will wake up to his parents having disappeared and left him with whoever is babysitting this week. Ideal for the severely autistic child who can't cope with things being out of routine. Rancid asked Slosh "what are you most worried about?", he replied "not getting on the flight, Wilby, the kids in general". Note how it's about them and their holiday first, and no mention of Seb and his exams.
- Racquet finally found out where they're going, and couldn't hide her disappointment that it's Barcelona ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
- next she opened a present (sat in the car, because why would you want to be home and involve your kids?). The first was a pair of Gucci sunglasses, which she was more excited about than the trip to Barcelona.
- Mum of the Year Racket has checked in on her severely autistic, violent toddler via the cctv (#ad). The hall was clean and tidy, Stabby's mum the cleaner was there, and Wilby happily wandered off with the childminder. His parents can't get him out of the door without being punched, hit, bitten and scratched, but he's lovely and calm with the paid employees ๐Ÿคท
- they're flying on SleazyJet, looks like Sloshy Joshy spared no expense of his pocket money for the most beautiful woman in his world!


Attached are a load of photos and videos I've saved this week, for your viewing pleasure!


If you are new, please read the wiki (pink button at the top) and if you are in need of support or advice in relation to domestic abuse, there are some links and helplines listed at the bottom of the wiki page
 

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    Can't stop howling everyone I play that clip when she says will I like it.

    Happy fortieth birthday Rach, enjoy your bike ride and whatever else Joyce has planned๐Ÿ˜‚ divorce is looking even more likely after this trip.
     
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    New thread title thanks to @Saltypopcorn ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰ some knock-off Gucci flip flops and a dress made out of an old towel are on their way to you, you'll have to provide your own tit tape though as we don't have a never ending pot of PayPal cash ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Last thread recap:
    - Rancho is still an absolute bleep.
    - she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
    - after the pretend drama of getting a bird out of a travel cage and into the aviary, off went Rambo to get Wilby out of bed (who's still in a cot with sides on, and drinking a bottle of milk). She played with a muslin cloth, but unfortunately thinks that "high" and "down" are opposites. Bestselling author, everyone!
    - BeKind drove Raq to "work", obviously the phone was shoved in her face to record it for posterity. Then she missed the turning, and Racket made a big deal of "we've only got 8 minutes to get to work" like the tat shop urgently needs to open at 10am on the dot ๐Ÿ™„ there was a bag hanging on the door, and she said "let's hope it's a donation and not a troll leaving me a bag of dog tit". RENT FREE! Also, not sure what she thinks people might donate to a shop selling overpriced rubbish ๐Ÿคท
    - Rango couldn't work the till, and had to get Emily in with a screwdriver, and the rest of the Snatchwork girls on facetime.
    - it obviously wasn't busy in the launderette, because Emily was hanging around the shop, pretending to be a customer and asking the price of things (top tip Random - people are more likely to buy tit if it's priced up). Ratchet told Emily and Betsy that if they were real customers she'd ring Joyce and ask them to leave. Betsy wandered around the shop mumbling about what she might buy, she didn't seem interested when Rampart asked her about the jumpers though!
    - back at the Patchwork Hamster Cage House, Sloshua was cooking a roast (of course) and Seb was trying to show him his veins. Bestselling author Rancho said "Seb's bin gym again" ๐Ÿ˜ฌ speak English, woman! Two different types of gravy, but neither were being made in the special gravy pan that she paid ยฃ39 for "because she can".
    - Arsetrid posted a story that Ramble hadn't put away the plants and doormat outside the tat shop, OF COURSE Raq's caption said "blame Betsy" ๐Ÿ™„
    - dots of doom up in the loft, with Seb lurking in the background. He said there was melted Lindor in the bed ๐Ÿคท Rawhide asked if he knew she's 40 next week, he said "yeah, you're going away. I've got my exams while you're away in Barbados". So despite the fact that for MONTHS she has been complaining that Seb is probably going to fail his GCSEs, they're pissing off and leaving him just as he starts them. Because Rancho's need for attention surpasses everything else in that shitshow house. She got excited at the thought of going to Barbados, and said that Joyce has booked for them to go away but she doesn't know where, but he has renewed their passports (conveniently forgetting that she recently said they'd renewed everyone's because they're going on a family holiday this summer). Then she launched into showing a load more tat for the shop, tut tut Rambo, they should be marked as #ad. Seb was in the background talking to Betsy on speakerphone. Then after he'd hung up he was trying to talk to her about some stuff on depop, she just kept telling him to go away, until she lost her rag and snarled ๐Ÿคฌ while wearing a t-shirt which said "do good things". What, like basically telling your stepson to piss off because you're busy flogging crap to strangers online? So good! She even yelled "the baby's asleep" at one point. What's that, Wilby's in bed at a sensible time instead of roaming the house eating crisps and doughnuts? First time for everything! She showed a personal alarm, and went off on a debate with herself over whether to open it or not. She pulled out the battery tab, and expected it to go off, then pressed the button for the torch. When she FINALLY worked out how to make it go off, by "giving it one of them", of course, she then set it off about 5 times. Edie was next up the stepladder stairs, and was straight into a little stationery box, saying "I want this one, can I have it". Then she set off the personal alarm twice, which Racket laughed at.
    - Rambo is running an online raffle, with the prizes kindly donated by other people (so yet again, getting people to donate stuff and then reaping the cash for herself). However the terms are confusing - on the website, in one place it says "all money" is going back into the CIC, in another it says "all profits". There is a difference Ratshit, which is it?
    - at the next women's centre, weirdo Jeremy turned up. He must be rubbing his hands together with glee, he keeps renting shithole buildings out to Ratchet, and she keeps doing them up out of her stash of stolen money. Definitely something dodgy going on there.
    - Wilby's in his trawler fishing outfit again.
    - she's taking the kids to get passport photos done, ready for their family holiday in a couple of months. Despite saying weeks ago that they were renewing all the passports.
    - Rambo's had a spray tan, and uploaded a photo of herself lifting her dress with no knickers on to show it off. Normal.
    - Patreon spies kindly shared some screenshots of Rancho getting ready for a "birthday tea", wearing a bizarre velvety, bright pink dress that only vaguely covered her boobs and vulva ๐Ÿ˜ฌ yet again proving that you simply can't buy class.
    - turns out it wasn't a birthday tea after all, but a surprise party (did Ratchet mention it's her 40th soon?). Arsetrid was there, and Knee Deep, plus all of "the circle" - except Stabby Jo. None of the kids were invited, apart from Betsy.
    - photos and videos emerged from the party of the year, and showed Racquet being hideously cringey as she pretended to be the most fun ever. Dancing around on the furniture, kissing and biting everyone (including Knee Deep's boobs), and Mannah's husband picking her up by putting his head between her legs so her thrush bucket was on the back of his neck ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ Knee Deep posted that she'd leave her husband for Hannah ๐Ÿคท when Random walked in to the "surprise" party, she was holding hands with Lianne ๐Ÿง looks like Stabby's been fully replaced in the attic sex games ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
    - the day after, Rancho was off out for lunch with "the girls", including Joyce. Imagine being so insecure that you can't go out for a couple of hours without worrying that your spineless husband is slinging his sausage up someone else ๐Ÿคท
    - a Tattler found the dress online for $300. All that money to look like you're trying to cover your modesty in a kid's size dressing gown ๐Ÿคท it looked very different on the model, Rambo obviously styled it differently to match the crack head Barbie look she was going for. Nailed it, hun!
    - The Snatchwork employees clubbed together to get her a birthday present. A pair of Gucci flip flops that cost ยฃ435. Relatable Ratchet strikes again. Seven people were shown in the celebratory photo, which works out at just over ยฃ60 each. Quite a lot to spend on your boss, unless she's paying you a hell of a lot more than your job is actually worth, of course.
    - she shared a load of photos and videos from her "surprise" party (that clearly wasn't a surprise - getting a spray tan, hair and make up done, and wearing a dress that basically showed EVERYTHING off to go out for a meal? Ok hun ๐Ÿคท). She made a point of saying that two of her "adopted dads" were there, yet neither her mum nor Gangsta Granny was there. Shy, quiet Charleeeee (with the lips, tits and arse) who's so conscious of her body was in a skin tight outfit, doing a Tina Turner impression like the little wallflower she is. Lots of cringey dancing and showing off for the camera (which was of course permanently in Rambo's hand). Apparently someone showed a piercing in the toilets ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
    - the alarm is set for 4.31 am to go to the airport. Remind us again that you're leaving your toddler who's so aggressive and uncontrollable, and your stepson who's literally starting his GCSEs.
    - 5.15am and they're getting in the car ready to go. No kids to wave them off, and assuming Wilby's still asleep so will wake up to his parents having disappeared and left him with whoever is babysitting this week. Ideal for the severely autistic child who can't cope with things being out of routine. Rancid asked Slosh "what are you most worried about?", he replied "not getting on the flight, Wilby, the kids in general". Note how it's about them and their holiday first, and no mention of Seb and his exams.
    - Racquet finally found out where they're going, and couldn't hide her disappointment that it's Barcelona ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
    - next she opened a present (sat in the car, because why would you want to be home and involve your kids?). The first was a pair of Gucci sunglasses, which she was more excited about than the trip to Barcelona.
    - Mum of the Year Racket has checked in on her severely autistic, violent toddler via the cctv (#ad). The hall was clean and tidy, Stabby's mum the cleaner was there, and Wilby happily wandered off with the childminder. His parents can't get him out of the door without being punched, hit, bitten and scratched, but he's lovely and calm with the paid employees ๐Ÿคท
    - they're flying on SleazyJet, looks like Sloshy Joshy spared no expense of his pocket money for the most beautiful woman in his world!


    Attached are a load of photos and videos I've saved this week, for your viewing pleasure!


    If you are new, please read the wiki (pink button at the top) and if you are in need of support or advice in relation to domestic abuse, there are some links and helplines listed at the bottom of the wiki page
    That was a brilliant recap and title, again โค.
    That hideous woman really is rotten to the core ๐Ÿ˜ซ.
     
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    I hope heโ€™s got an 8 am museum trip planned followed by a historical bus tour. Lunch in McDonaldโ€™s then onto the birthday treat of a 20 mile bike ride. She will be loving life. ๐Ÿ˜€
     
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    Excellent recap and title! โค
    I canโ€™t wait for the stories tomorrow detailing just how pissed off excited she is for her bike ride! Maybe Sloshy will troll her with a constant โ€œdo you love it?โ€ ๐Ÿคฃ
     
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    Do you know what those videos of her being told where she was going and her opening her gifts were like, we all have a friend who makes their kids sit surrounded by Christmas or birthday presents to post a show off picture in Facebook. Thatโ€™s what it was like. Crass and braggy. I canโ€™t stand that sort of in your face tit.

    You know the saying โ€ฆ

    money talks and wealth whispers.
     
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    Genuine question - what has she done to her face to make it so ugly? She used to be quite pretty, in my opinion. I know sheโ€™s put on weight, but her face seems to have changed shape and her nose looks bigger. Itโ€™s weird. Sheโ€™s so ugly, now.
     
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    Genuine question - what has she done to her face to make it so ugly? She used to be quite pretty, in my opinion. I know sheโ€™s put on weight, but her face seems to have changed shape and her nose looks bigger. Itโ€™s weird. Sheโ€™s so ugly, now.
    You're right, her once normal face is now ugly โ˜น.
     
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    She has a cracking figure; gorgeous. I think most women who have several kids would kill for a body like hers.

    But her teeth are still an absolute mess and hand-on-heart Iโ€™d happily live without her figure and keep my own mouth thanks. I was watching the video in the car in the recap and her teeth make me ๐Ÿคข

    She is the walking embodiment of that phrase โ€˜Body off Baywatch, face off Crimewatchโ€™ ainโ€™t she?

    The gob on it ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿคญ๐Ÿคญ
     
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    It must be a nice break for her employees not have to deal with her this week! Imagine how chill everyone is without the manic leader ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ
     
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    Bike ride? Is that a code word for all the lush sex theyโ€™ll be having??? Seeing as sheโ€™s the biggest bike in Devonโ€ฆ. ๐Ÿคข๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
     
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    Excellent title and excellent recap. Absolutely love that you've included that clip of the big reveal. She's such a spoilt brat. Her face ๐Ÿคฃ. I also hope it's a day of art, culture, museums and generally stuff that Joyce will enjoy ๐Ÿ˜†.
     
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    Thank you so much @DipsyDoodle. I can't wait to receive my prize, I just hope it doesn't take as long to arrive as goods purchased from the Patchwork S**t Shop ๐Ÿ˜ƒ. Honoured to have my first EVER Tattle thread title so I'm away to give it one of them with a glass of fizz cats p**s - who am I??!! As you were Tattlers ๐Ÿ˜˜
     
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    Thank you for a fab recap as always.

    Just wanted to say that if anyone is having a bad day, just think, you could be Ratchet, itโ€™s your 40th birthday, and you could waking up in Barcelona to go on a bike ride with Sloshua, but secretly wishing you were in Barbados.

    Personally I would love to be in Barcelona with my boyfriend right now about to go on a bike ride, but knowing she doesnโ€™t want to is really lush and has made my day.

    I think Sloshโ€™s days as part of the patchwork crew are numbered after this. I give it 6 monthsโ€ฆโ€ฆ.

    I think there was something a bit quirky/geeky she liked about him, but itโ€™s wearing thin now and this trip for her 40th is the final straw.
     
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    Thank you for a fab recap as always.

    Just wanted to say that if anyone is having a bad day, just think, you could be Ratchet, itโ€™s your 40th birthday, and you could waking up in Barcelona to go on a bike ride with Sloshua, but secretly wishing you were in Barbados.

    Personally I would love to be in Barcelona with my boyfriend right now about to go on a bike ride, but knowing she doesnโ€™t want to is really lush and has made my day.

    I think Sloshโ€™s days as part of the patchwork crew are numbered after this. I give it 6 monthsโ€ฆโ€ฆ.

    I think there was something a bit quirky/geeky she liked about him, but itโ€™s wearing thin now and this trip for her 40th is the final straw.
    Unless she gets another baby from him Iโ€™m sure a patreon follower said on here they were waiting till after her birthday to try on a q&a not long back

    Iโ€™m sure she already had those Gucci loafers Iโ€™m still calling a bag and purse today we will see! Be telling if all her posts are her birthday reposts rather than her actual trip away
     
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    Amazing Recap ๐Ÿ˜ The clip of her trying to look happy when she realizes that she isnโ€™t going to Barbados is the best ๐Ÿคฃ I will watch that anytime I need a good laugh ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
     
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    She really does herself no favours gurning with all her teeth on show like that.

    I agree - fab figure but she pulls the weirdest most gormless faces and makes herself look demented.
     
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