Prison life

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Just found this thread. My fellas done overall about 17 yrs inside (including a 12 yr stretch). He's IPP so always a chance of him going back for the dumbest of things. He's got a good P.O though and sticks to his licence conditions which aren't too strict considering. He's always telling me mad jail tales. He did say though that the things he's seen over the years have made him lose alot of his empathy.
 
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Just found this thread. My fellas done overall about 17 yrs inside (including a 12 yr stretch). He's IPP so always a chance of him going back for the dumbest of things. He's got a good P.O though and sticks to his licence conditions which aren't too strict considering. He's always telling me mad jail tales. He did say though that the things he's seen over the years have made him lose alot of his empathy.
Ooooof IPP. Biggest bunch of a ever. Good to hear he's doing well and his contact is good.
 
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Ooooof IPP. Biggest bunch of a ever. Good to hear he's doing well and his contact is good.
You get freaks who hurt kids and all sorts who haven't served a quarter of what he has and he's never hurt a child/woman or done anything sexual/deviant. Obviously he's no saint but I do get sad for him sometimes. He said its not even being in jail that ever bothered him but it was the not knowing when he would get out.
 
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So so SO many people in prison have serious mental illnesses and personality disorders. It not an excuse, but it’s sad to see. No programmes or help of any kind that I saw in there. (It was during Covid for me, so perhaps that had an influence on what was available). I have borderline personality disorder and am autistic (also depression, anxiety, PTSD)
110% agree with you. As would every prisoner governor I know. Covid bolloxed things to a point. But in my experience of UK, jails there are long wait lists for everything. The management of the jail try to do their best but it is nothing short of firefighting. The PSAM's (what used to be DDC's) are in the same boat. Until there is serious investment in the system (and its the same in a lot countries) which results in the rehabilitation part as opposed to just a big lock box, nothing will change im afraid.
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You get freaks who hurt kids and all sorts who haven't served a quarter of what he has and he's never hurt a child/woman or done anything sexual/deviant. Obviously he's no saint but I do get sad for him sometimes. He said its not even being in jail that ever bothered him but it was the not knowing when he would get out.
I'm not UK adjacent but for my job I have to understand it because occasionally we have to deal with it (still). We looked at it when it came in (yes Im that old) and questioned our life choices even from outside the UK.

He's doing well that (a) he got P and (b) he's sticking to his licence. Fair play to him and long may it continue. And FWIW, he's got my positive feelings headed his way. Because we aren't all c*nts
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@Lucyxxxx Do you mind if I have a rant about IPP? Because we occasionally come across those who believe what the Daily Heil tell them. So to be able to reference your posts if it educates 1 person would be awesome. Feel free to say no.
 
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In my experience, the CPS work very closely with the police and they do in fact have a lot of control over which judge presided over a case. You lot can talk about how they’re not meant to and that the UK is not like the US and blah blah blah, but in MY EXPERIENCE they were able to delay a case being brought to court because they were waiting for a particular judge that they had chosen to sit over it.
By "you lot" I'm guessing you mean, people that actually work in the system and know what they're talking about? YOU OKAY HUN ?
 
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110% agree with you. As would every prisoner governor I know. Covid bolloxed things to a point. But in my experience of UK, jails there are long wait lists for everything. The management of the jail try to do their best but it is nothing short of firefighting. The PSAM's (what used to be DDC's) are in the same boat. Until there is serious investment in the system (and its the same in a lot countries) which results in the rehabilitation part as opposed to just a big lock box, nothing will change im afraid.
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I'm not UK adjacent but for my job I have to understand it because occasionally we have to deal with it (still). We looked at it when it came in (yes Im that old) and questioned our life choices even from outside the UK.

He's doing well that (a) he got P and (b) he's sticking to his licence. Fair play to him and long may it continue. And FWIW, he's got my positive feelings headed his way. Because we aren't all c*nts
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@Lucyxxxx Do you mind if I have a rant about IPP? Because we occasionally come across those who believe what the Daily Heil tell them. So to be able to reference your posts if it educates 1 person would be awesome. Feel free to say no.
Please do rant!! It would be refreshing to have someone to speak to about it who actually understands! ❤
 
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Please do rant!! It would be refreshing to have someone to speak to about it who actually understands! ❤
Give me 24 hours or so. The IPP system there is beyond comprehension for us but I need to have a rummage and find some cases before I start shouting. Give the boy a pat on the back from me!
 
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The service will look after her. This is literally what they are trained for. And if you are ever concerned you can flag it.

Have you got visits and things sorted? There are people on here who can point you in the right direction if you haven't.

Don't hesitate to say something if you cant or don't know how to. There is no judgement here
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I know that feeling. Seems to be the season for it at the moment!
Thank you so much.
No visits sorted at the moment, she’s in prison at the other end of the country (Scotland and I live in the Midlands) but we’re hoping I can get to see her at least once before the end of her sentence (which is months rather than years thankfully) i just sent a letter off to her today.

I’ve told her I miss her, I’m thinking of her and that if she needs anything to let me know. I think that’s all I can do- to send her my love and support. She has no family and I’m all she’s got really. I feel so helpless- I work full time, I care for my husband and I’m disabled myself so theres not much I can do practically.

Im so grateful to those on here- I’ve somewhat kept it locked away as there’s no-one really I can talk to about it. I know she had resigned herself to being sent to prison before the trial and she arranged for her support worker to let me know which I’m grateful for- but it’s affected me worse than I thought it would.
 
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Thank you so much.
No visits sorted at the moment, she’s in prison at the other end of the country (Scotland and I live in the Midlands) but we’re hoping I can get to see her at least once before the end of her sentence (which is months rather than years thankfully) i just sent a letter off to her today.

I’ve told her I miss her, I’m thinking of her and that if she needs anything to let me know. I think that’s all I can do- to send her my love and support. She has no family and I’m all she’s got really. I feel so helpless- I work full time, I care for my husband and I’m disabled myself so theres not much I can do practically.

Im so grateful to those on here- I’ve somewhat kept it locked away as there’s no-one really I can talk to about it. I know she had resigned herself to being sent to prison before the trial and she arranged for her support worker to let me know which I’m grateful for- but it’s affected me worse than I thought it would.
You can also sign up for prison video visits, if you’re on her visits/approved contacts list you can download an app on phone/laptop and have Skype like visits with her if the distance is too much to travel
 
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Thank you so much.
No visits sorted at the moment, she’s in prison at the other end of the country (Scotland and I live in the Midlands) but we’re hoping I can get to see her at least once before the end of her sentence (which is months rather than years thankfully) i just sent a letter off to her today.

I’ve told her I miss her, I’m thinking of her and that if she needs anything to let me know. I think that’s all I can do- to send her my love and support. She has no family and I’m all she’s got really. I feel so helpless- I work full time, I care for my husband and I’m disabled myself so theres not much I can do practically.

Im so grateful to those on here- I’ve somewhat kept it locked away as there’s no-one really I can talk to about it. I know she had resigned herself to being sent to prison before the trial and she arranged for her support worker to let me know which I’m grateful for- but it’s affected me worse than I thought it would.
There is financial help available for visiting (travel, accommodation & meals) if she doesn't get any other visitors. But I’m guessing thats going to be difficult with you working and caring for your hubby.

There is also the Email A Prisoner service which is quicker than using the post as the emails are printed out every day.
 
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Just caught up on this thread. This women’s prison reality/documentary series is a few years old now but one woman’s story in particular really affected me at the time (I think she’s in Ep 1) and her wee face always stayed with me. I don’t know what she needed but it wasn’t the jail.
 
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There is financial help available for visiting (travel, accommodation & meals) if she doesn't get any other visitors. But I’m guessing thats going to be difficult with you working and caring for your hubby.

There is also the Email A Prisoner service which is quicker than using the post as the emails are printed out every day.
It’s not so much the finances that are the problem it’s the time (time off work, etc) I promised her however that I would try and try I will. Thanks though- that’s really helpful to know.

I’m going to do the email thing, however she asked me to send her a letter first which she can reply to. Once she writes back I’ll start emailing her. :)
 
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Just a little update- she rang me out of the blue this evening, it was lovely to speak to her.
We’re going to do the virtual visit thing, she’s sending me a letter this weekend with all the details and everything in. Feeling a little better now I at least know she’s alright and coping okay.
 
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I’ve got my first visit next week with my old friend/ex I’m so nervous ,.
 
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I’ve got my first visit next week with my old friend/ex I’m so nervous ,.
Honestly don't be. I was so scared first visit. By the time I was on 3rd visit I was going on like I owned the gaff. Some prisons are first come first served so try get there early.
 
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Honestly don't be. I was so scared first visit. By the time I was on 3rd visit I was going on like I owned the gaff. Some prisons are first come first served so try get there early.
Thankyou so much, oh gosh what do you mean about first come first served ? Already getting stressed about what to wear 😂. xx
 
Just don't turn up late. They will never book more seats than they have available as there are various processes regarding prisoners that need to be addressed.

Get there early. Got through screening with the passive dog and whatever else they have in place. Don't wear anything hideously inappropriate: and most of all, enjoy your visit! You won't believe the good it does the prisoner.

And if you don't understand something or don't know what to do, ask an Officer. They are humans, and not ogres.
 
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Thankyou so much, oh gosh what do you mean about first come first served ? Already getting stressed about what to wear 😂. xx
So who gets there first goes in first. I used to try get there an hour early and there would be about 10 people there already with the same idea as me. Normally send you down to visiting 10 at a time.
 
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Sounds about right. Just saves people standing around waiting for the passive dog etc. Plus there are processes going on the other side of the door at the same time

Edit: And please, don't touch the dog. Sound like a 🛎🔚 but they are doing their job and they know when they are working. It won't distract the dog, but the handlers get annoyed 😇

And just in case you are scared of dogs, don't be. These aren't the bitey ones. 😂😂

You will be sniffed and ignored

Another Edit: And if you don't know: Ask. Either on site or there are enough adjacent Frauen und Herren on here 😁
 
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