Is growing pains and all meant to be hurting near your ovaries here and there? It’s like the right hand side and has a sensation and I have no idea what it could be. Scared for the worst but praying it’s just growing pains as I’m only 6 weeks
Pregnancy #50
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If you're being told by online accounts/antenatal classes that interventions during labour are bad, or a sign that you've done something wrong/not tried hard enough/not followed "the rules", please ignore them!! Preparing for birth is one thing, and it's great to have an awareness of what you would/wouldn't prefer during labour and what interventions/pain relief may be available to you at what stage (I recommend looking into this so you're not taken by surprise on the day), but as many of you have already said, how your labour goes is actually determined by a) what baby decides to get up to and b) what's recommended as the safest option by the medical professionals involved in your care. Some labours happen to be very straightforward and other labours are more complicated, and very little of that will be down to what you're doing so please don't beat yourself up if things don't go how you hoped, or how online accounts told you they should go if you'd just "tried harder". Accepting interventions to get baby here safely and to make things more comfortable for you is never something to be ashamed of, and is no reflection on how hard you've tried or how worthy you are as a mother, so don't let anyone let you feel otherwise 
You will only hear stories about traumatic births but it’s not inevitable. Obviously you need to do what’s right for you but it’s not a choice between a traumatic birth and a c section, you could just as easily have a straightforward labour and birth. Like PP have said it’s entirely down to luck, and I guess at least a c section is a known quantity to an extent (although you won’t know how your body will heal but aside from that) whereas you have no idea how a vaginal birth will go!
I’m weirdly terrified about c sections though, like the thought is far far scarier to me, which probably biases my opinion haha
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Wrote and deleted something loads of times but you’ve put it so much more articulately!If you're being told by online accounts/antenatal classes that interventions during labour are bad, or a sign that you've done something wrong/not tried hard enough/not followed "the rules", please ignore them!! Preparing for birth is one thing, and it's great to have an awareness of what you would/wouldn't prefer during labour and what interventions/pain relief may be available to you at what stage (I recommend looking into this so you're not taken by surprise on the day), but as many of you have already said, how your labour goes is actually determined by a) what baby decides to get up to and b) what's recommended as the safest option by the medical professionals involved in your care. Some labours happen to be very straightforward and other labours are more complicated, and very little of that will be down to what you're doing so please don't beat yourself up if things don't go how you hoped, or how online accounts told you they should go if you'd just "tried harder". Accepting interventions to get baby here safely and to make things more comfortable for you is never something to be ashamed of, and is no reflection on how hard you've tried or how worthy you are as a mother, so don't let anyone let you feel otherwise
I’m having an elective because I know how well my body heals after surgery normally. Having a cesarean is less scary to me than natural birth so works better for my needs.
Another thing I read in the PBC book was that you can decline being induced but I didn't think this was a safe option for baby?
I think the more I read the more confused I'm getting. Being induced terrifies me because I've heard negative stories, same with c sections. I am hoping for a natural water birth but I need additional scans in October to find out if my placenta has moved so it may very well be a c section. I'm trying to remain calm and I keep telling myself that the baby needs to come out one way or another but sometimes you just feel so out of control.
I think the more I read the more confused I'm getting. Being induced terrifies me because I've heard negative stories, same with c sections. I am hoping for a natural water birth but I need additional scans in October to find out if my placenta has moved so it may very well be a c section. I'm trying to remain calm and I keep telling myself that the baby needs to come out one way or another but sometimes you just feel so out of control.
I’m hoping for a non medicated water birth, but just going to go with the flow and what will be will be. I just think the baby has to come out some way and that’s the end goal!
yes this. I only ever got told horror stories but I ended up with an unmedicated water birth labour was an hour. Positives do happen daily too
They’re right in that you can say no to anything you want to. You can go give birth in your garden shed if you like. There’s some women on the PBC group and others who are happy to go 44 weeks before even considering anything else, I’ve got to say the risk of stillbirth is unacceptably high for me at that gestation and not worth a birth experience. I know I probably ended up with a crappy birth because I got induced but I was 41+5 and there was no sign of anything and having known friends of friends have stillbirths at late gestations I wasn’t willing to risk it.
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I remember reading a group on Facebook there was a lady who was 44 weeks and refusing everything i think she wanted a home birth. There was lots of arguments between posters and what was safe and people who said it wasn’t got kicked from the group. She went onto have a still born. Obviously maybe not caused by gestation but non the less it’s still a horrific situation.
I'm booked in for an elective c-section after a traumatic birth with my first born. 7 weeks away now
Sorry edited to add a TW
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I’ve heard elective c sections are so calm and peaceful. My friend who had a very traumatic first birth found her elective Csection very healing mentally.I'm booked in for an elective c-section after a traumatic birth with my first born. 7 weeks away now
exact same here! i'll just be happy he's here and healthy however it happened
You can theoretically decline anything until there becomes an overwhelming medical need, but it's worth knowing the associated risks. Induction is recommended when overdue because the risk of stillbirth increases after 42 weeks, and sometimes medical teams will push for this sooner if there are other risks. Some trusts recommend induction when you're a week overdue, others at two weeks - it's worth speaking to your midwife to find out local policy and what your options are/what the risks are. I had an induction booked for when I was 41+6, but went into labour at 41+4 and gave birth at 41+5 - I'd had three sweep attempts in the week/10 days leading up to this, two of which were completed (one my cervix was too high to reach), and one of the sweeps was the morning of the day I went into labour. Induction can be unpleasant and also a long and draining experience, but it's there when needed because it's medically necessary if you don't opt for a caesarean - but sweeps and things like bouncing on birthing balls, exercise etc can all help to encourage baby out before that becomes necessary
There seems to be some companies and “movements” who think birth has been medicalised and what is completely natural for women has been taken over by doctors and hospitals and unnecessary medical intervention when “women have been doing it for thousands of years”. What that forgets is that for thousands of years women died in labour when they didn’t get medical intervention they needed. I have always trusted my midwives advice, if they advise that an induction is necessary to get the baby here safely, I will likely take that advice but I know not everyone has good experiences of doctors etc!
*Birth Experience*
With my first I had reduced movements so was booked for an induction 2 days later as by the time you’re full term if you’re having reduced movement and they don’t know why it’s safer for the baby to come out than stay in. I ended up going for further monitoring the next day and she was so active we failed the monitoring and had to do it again. They advised cancelling the induction as she was clearly very active and had been having a slow day, and so the risk of medical intervention outweighed the risk to the baby staying in. It was my decision but that was their advice, which I took, as I’d never had a baby but they’ve delivered hundreds!
Ended up going in for an induction after another bout of reduced movements and my waters broke while I was waiting to be induced. Ultimately was 4 hours from first contraction to her being here, with a dose of pethidine/diamorphine(?), gas and air and a second degree tear which I can honestly say I didn’t notice in the newborn bubble.
Ultimately you know your body, you’ll know if the doctors advice is contrary to what you’re feeling.
For me my birth plan this time is 2 healthy people in, 3 healthy people out. A positive first birth doesn’t guarantee a positive second birth so I’m happy to take advice if thing aren’t progressing. I think a willingness to be flexible and not put too many expectations on yourself and your birth makes it slightly easier but at the end of the day, however he or she comes out, you’re a bloody superstar!
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Exactly! I think the difference is you have no idea whether it’ll be positive or not until it’s happening, so I can fully understand why taking control and having an elective would be preferable in some situations!yes this. I only ever got told horror stories but I ended up with an unmedicated water birth labour was an hour. Positives do happen daily too
I was told with my first that I wouldn't be able to have a c section due to a bowel disorder that makes it highly likely I would get a twisted bowel or another complication. Obviously it was still an option in an emergency but they didn't recommend an elective. The worst part for me was not knowing when my son would arrive. I was told that I should be induced the day before my due date, which I said no to, and my son arrived the day after my due date. I couldn't have the birth I had planned due to high blood pressure but by that point I didn't care lol! This time round I'm just going with birth vibes rather than a birth plan because I felt like I'd failed for not getting everything I wanted.
My birth plan is to have a healthy baby and be healthy and well myself 
I'm literally not even going to create a birth plan beyond my husband being there and no visitors. I'm usually a complete prepper but this is so out of my hands and I know literally nothing about it so it's very much 
I'd prefer not to have a c section bc of the restricted movements after but if it's necessary then it's necessary.
Low expectations = low chance of disappointment
I'd prefer not to have a c section bc of the restricted movements after but if it's necessary then it's necessary. Low expectations = low chance of disappointment
Agree with you @kayefeluu20
I only want my Husband there and also no visitors in hospital. Maybe my mum dependent on time spent there.
I will read up on pain relief for my own knowledge. At the moment I’m considering a Tens Machine. I’ll pack my hospital bag and then go with the flow.
I only want my Husband there and also no visitors in hospital. Maybe my mum dependent on time spent there.
I will read up on pain relief for my own knowledge. At the moment I’m considering a Tens Machine. I’ll pack my hospital bag and then go with the flow.
I normally fully research and plan everything, but I went into labour just knowing that I wanted only my husband there, and I'd prefer less interventions if possible but would follow medical advice. The only thing I wish I'd learnt more about is pain relief (criteria/timeframes for being allowed each one) as I was disappointed not to be able to have an epidural due to the anaesthetist being held up with another patient, and my labour progressing too quickly by the time they arrived - if I'd know more about it, I would have requested it much earlier rather than trying to soldier on with gas and air. So I definitely think you've got the right idea knowing your options but not trying to make plans
The only benefit of giving birth during covid
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