I think it really depends who you ask, I’ve never really understood not allowing visitors (unless for health reasons etc), and as others have said, in theory it’s nice to be alone but in practice you might need more assistance that you’ll think BUT the caveat to that is my family and my in laws are pretty good with boundaries, and genuinely helped with laundry/walking dogs/making food/cleaning the house so we could hold the baby. We had visitors a lot of the time and I just got my boobs out and people left the room if they felt uncomfortable haha. If I had horror stories about being made to make everyone tea and biscuits 1 day pp I might change my mind, plus I like being around family at the best of time so it’s very much personality based too! If you don’t want visitors those early days, I think honesty is the best policy, so there’s no resentment and you don’t feel disregarded. It’s perfectly valid to just want to be in your little bubble, just tell them and they might grumble but they’ll get over it!We've compromised and have decided on a quick hello before we settle with just the three of us. I think it just wounded me that he wouldn't consider how I'd be feeling at the time and I felt a little bit like he was being too focused on his parents and making them happy. Probably a hormone thingit's all resolved and okay now.
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They're quite good with boundaries (so far) I'm just not very social or family oriented really, I'm still not fully comfortable around them and DEFINITELY not planning on breastfeeding in front of anyone straight away, I'm very socially anxious and the idea of it makes me want to curl up and hide. We don't have dogs to walk and our cat hates people
our house is also quite small for visitors. The only exception I'd make is if I had a c section as stated above. We've settled for a quick visit to say hello and have a cuddle then leaving us to it for a couple of days.Sounds like you’ve got it fully sorted then! I wasn’t trying to change your mind don’t worry, you’ve got to do what’s right for you and your family!They're quite good with boundaries (so far) I'm just not very social or family oriented really, I'm still not fully comfortable around them and DEFINITELY not planning on breastfeeding in front of anyone straight away, I'm very socially anxious and the idea of it makes me want to curl up and hide. We don't have dogs to walk and our cat hates people
I will say though I’m quite socially awkward and it’s so strange how quickly I felt comfortable whipping my baps out ( a sentence I never thought I’d say
). For out and about you can get huge muslin squares off Amazon that are a life saver for when feeding, 10/10 recommend!My in laws were there when we came home (but asleep in bed as it was midnight!) as they were looking after the dog. We all got up in the morning, had cuddles and celebrations etc and they then left. We didn’t then have visitors or see anyone for 5 days apart from the midwives etc (the 40 degree heatwave didn’t help!). I thought that was a nice balance. Conscious I am very close to them, especially my MIL (I couldn’t have coped with my own mum there). It’s all your decision though! Your body, your rules in the early days.We've compromised and have decided on a quick hello before we settle with just the three of us. I think it just wounded me that he wouldn't consider how I'd be feeling at the time and I felt a little bit like he was being too focused on his parents and making them happy. Probably a hormone thing
Thanks for the muslin rec! Was looking at those huge bib things but that's more of a spectacle than a big old muslin squareSounds like you’ve got it fully sorted then! I wasn’t trying to change your mind don’t worry, you’ve got to do what’s right for you and your family!
I will say though I’m quite socially awkward and it’s so strange how quickly I felt comfortable whipping my baps out ( a sentence I never thought I’d say
In fairness I used to literally put it over my head and get her latched then take it off my head so it just covered boob, so it was possibly more of a spectacle than just not using it, but my friend had them and she was able to very subtly pop the baby on and off under it! They also doubled as a very lightweight blanket when it was hot, and were generally a lifesaver so honestly couldn’t recommend them enough and will be stocking up this time round!
Hope you don’t mind me joining 
I had my 12 week scan today and all is looking good. Just waiting on the screening results. Due in Jan!
I’ve already got a 2 year old and sadly had a miscarriage a few months before falling pregnant with this one. Hadn’t realised how much I was still hurting from it until the scan today and saw them wriggling around and heart beating.
Hope everyone is doing ok in the heat, my first is a summer baby so can fully sympathise with those near their due date and melting!
I had my 12 week scan today and all is looking good. Just waiting on the screening results. Due in Jan! I’ve already got a 2 year old and sadly had a miscarriage a few months before falling pregnant with this one. Hadn’t realised how much I was still hurting from it until the scan today and saw them wriggling around and heart beating.
Hope everyone is doing ok in the heat, my first is a summer baby so can fully sympathise with those near their due date and melting!
Exciting!! Congratulations. I’m due Jan too! How long did they say to wait for the bloods?Hope you don’t mind me joining
I’ve already got a 2 year old and sadly had a miscarriage a few months before falling pregnant with this one. Hadn’t realised how much I was still hurting from it until the scan today and saw them wriggling around and heart beating.
Hope everyone is doing ok in the heat, my first is a summer baby so can fully sympathise with those near their due date and melting!
Just want to say I got mine back five days after bloods were taken. Postal results rather than phone.
Crampy stomach ache and back ache on and off. Really thought I’d have a baby by the end of today but no contractions and no waters gone!
Was told up to 2 weeks via post. I’ve heard higher risk results tend to hear back quicker than lower risk.
I’m at a different trust for this baby than I was my first so could be different anyway but last time think it’s was about a week.
Can I just ask about weight gain? Sorry if this is a sensitive topic for anyone (so putting behind a spoiler) xx
Last year I lost over 4 stone through calorie deficit and was on a 3-times weekly weight training programme. I plan to carry on going to the gym (adapting exercise where needed) and carrying on in my eating habits in terms of tracking calories but eating as much as needed to maintain my weight loss and obviously the extra calories needed during 2/3rd trimesters and breastfeeding. I’m only 6 weeks in so far.
Has anyone else been through something similar? Also interested to know how much weight gain people are seeing or how much “extra” you are actually eating? Lots of my friends have said their eating habits/cravings didn’t change much, and so weight gain was just in line with what they’d expect.
Has anyone else been through something similar? Also interested to know how much weight gain people are seeing or how much “extra” you are actually eating? Lots of my friends have said their eating habits/cravings didn’t change much, and so weight gain was just in line with what they’d expect.
My eating habits didn't change much - I went off hot food so I ate a lot of salads early on. Mostly though, I don't find myself eating more. In fact sometimes the portions are smaller bc I'm bloated or not in the mood to eat. When I am hungry, the hunger is just way more intense than I've felt before! I still will eat a normal amount to satisfy it. I think it varies person to person and what your input was pre pregnancy. I used to be a post dinner snacker - now I don't eat past about 7pm unless I'm ravenous. Used to avoid breakfast, now eat it daily.
I’ve lost 1.5st since finding out I was pregnant. I’m 13 weeks. I’ve not been ill, I’ve just been eating very differently. I’m eating smaller meals but nutritionally better meals. I’m expecting to get much bigger later on instead. I also know women who are as far along as me who’ve put on two stone as their diet has consisted of mainly McDonald’s as that’s all they’ve been able to keep down. You’ll definitely find women at both ends of the weight gain spectrum.
I lost weight at the beginning because of the sickness and couldn’t stomach anything, I’m now almost 17 weeks and have put about 7 lbs on 
I have a similar story. Always been big and last year decided to do something about it. Gym, steps, calorie deficit. No nonsense as diets mess with my mental health. I then had to go on steroids for an eye problem and I basically reversed most of my progress. Then in February I’ve fell pregnant with twins. I’m big (BMI 45, 5ft10 but have a high amount of muscle too). I knew it wasn’t going to be easy and in the first trimester, I couldn’t stomach anything but convenience / fast food. I know however that by the 2nd trimester I hadn’t put any weight on and started to eat much healthier. I haven’t weighed myself since as I have a history of bad mental health related to weight and food issues. I decided there and then that my pregnancy wouldn’t be me stepping on the scales every day and feeling upset, I'm only planning on doing this once. I am eating a lot though, and it’s getting harder to stay active even though my target is to do 6000 steps a day, lift weights in the gym twice a week (although much lighter than I used to) and swim twice a week. If anything, it stops my joints from seizing up and keeps my head in the right place. I’m probably ballooning to the biggest size I’ll ever be, but there’s only so much I can do about that. My saving Grace is that I’ve gone off sweet stuff, so hoping that will help. No one has weighed me at any of my appointments either apart from my first booking appointment.
I have decided I may weigh myself once just before they arrive, and after to see how much I was carrying baby-wise as I’m genuinely interested, and then it’ll be breastfeeding and getting back into exercise slowly. At the end of the day, I do want to set a good example for my children so the plan is to focus on healthy eating and exercise during maternity leave. I feel like some of you might call that wishful thinking but that’s the plan!
I have decided I may weigh myself once just before they arrive, and after to see how much I was carrying baby-wise as I’m genuinely interested, and then it’ll be breastfeeding and getting back into exercise slowly. At the end of the day, I do want to set a good example for my children so the plan is to focus on healthy eating and exercise during maternity leave. I feel like some of you might call that wishful thinking but that’s the plan!
Thanks ladies, really helpful to read some stories!
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This is totally key, your MH has to come first and having healthy babies is priority. Staying in the routine is my focus, to make the birth itself and getting back on top of training afterwards as simple as poss 🩷
Does or has anyone here have/had a low lying placenta? Just found out I have one 
I did with my first which they found at 20 weeks. I then had a scan at 32 I think to check if it had moved up and it had.Does or has anyone here have/had a low lying placenta? Just found out I have one
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