Pregnancy #41

[catgal]

I'm not in Scotland but it does work the same here with growth scans.

So with my daughter, they couldn't get her measurements properly, so has the opposite to you and it looked like she jumped up the charts after 3 scans of dropping.
And they just shrugged it off basically.
I've never had an accurate growth scan.
They estimated my second to be 7lb2 at 40 weeks. She was born 5 days later 11lbs.
And this time around, they estimated her to be over 9lb at 40 weeks. She was born 6 days later at 6lb14.

If they can't get the head measurement properly, it will completeeeelyyy change the measurements.
Which will be why the doctor isn't worried and they're happy to just give you another scan next week

You can 100% refuse induction if you don't want it

Thanks for the reply you’re totally right! Other people have told me their stories too and obviously these growth scans aren’t accurate. How could they be Wow 11lbs! How can they be so far off! Yeah the midwife said about the head measurement I just don’t get why the woman doing the scan didn’t say! Totally could reassure you instead of you walking out there thinking negatively! I guess there’s still just a wee part of me that’s wondering if there’s an actual reason for the apparent drop off! But just taking each day as it comes and if she’s moving around then I’m happy just a scary thought, I didn’t want to be induced unless absolutely necessary! But then wondering if she’d be better out than in. Eugh the stresses never end do they!

 

[themuffinwoman]

Me. I’ve really been struggling with exactly this for the past month or so. My work set-up sounds very similar and also the company is super disorganised and can’t seem to fathom that I’m almost 7 months pregnant. You really do have to advocate for yourself and put boundaries in place, which is a lot easier said than done.
I also end up feeling like when I’m concentrating on work that I’m not concentrating on prioritising baby. It’s a real head messer.
Just know you’re doing your best, put yourself forward and lean on those around you as much as possible x

Totally get you on prioritising yourself and baby and putting boundaries in place. Normally I don’t bother if it’s me and I’m stressed but obviously now it’s different, I’m very much a yes person so now it’s like I’m letting people down. My own fault I know for setting a precedent like that, but like you say, when I get so into work stuff it’s like oh right I’m pregnant I can’t go on a transatlantic work trip next April

Yesss! I feel like I can manage one thing a day e.g if I'm working that's it I'm too exhausted for anything else. And feel you on the bursting into tears, me and my partner had a stupid argument over something petty last night which I'd usually brush off but I was full on sobbing lol.

Honestly I’m useless after 3pm, whether it’s hospital appointments or work, I’m just dead and I really Can’t think of anything or process much information.

Same, arguments are awful and I normally have a calm approach to them but now I just wanna run out and slam the door and cry.

 

[GlennCoco]

I'm at the point in pregnancy where I've just done the washing up and now need to sit down and rest I swear down it was later on with my first that I was at this point!

 

[tattle420]

on my way to 36w and i can't believe i've come this far, it always seemed so far away. time has honestly flown and i'm at the stage where i'm done being pregnant but the thought of going through labour makes me any twinge or pain i feel and my brain panics and goes into override lol

 

[Married2019]

I didn’t go back - pre children I was a 34D and after 2 I’m a 34E… pregnant with number 3 and scared for whats to come! Xx

That's how I'm feeling with it at the moment, fingers crossed for us both

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

I'm at the point in pregnancy where I've just done the washing up and now need to sit down and rest I swear down it was later on with my first that I was at this point!

My bump is so tight after standing up making dinner I can’t eat. I’m only 28 weeks

 

[definitelynotvlad]

I’m 39+3 today and I am FED UP. My son was born at 39+2 so I genuinely never considered I’d go past that gestation this time, I’ve never been so pregnant in my life trying to enjoy it before the chaos, and because I’ll never be pregnant (on purpose) again, but FML if he could just get a move on now. Off swimming to see if it gets anything going since nothing else has worked, have warned my family & friends that if I’m still pregnant in November they’ll all be best off avoiding me.
I also keep remembering how much I hate being in labour and think the conflicting emotions are probably not helping me relax enough to actually get going. Need to find my zen, since a massive glass of wine is off the cards.
Sorry for the rant - I think everyone IRL is sick of hearing it

 

[WeHadFunRight]

I’m trying to research c-sections and if I can give anyone advice, please DO NOT visit midwifery.org.uk absolutely horrendous - I’m not even that sensitive but now I want to get the whole site cancelled.

ETA

I think the first couple of first hand stories they have on there should be removed or moved to the bottom as they are SO negative and alarmist - they really upset me! There’s not much balance to them tbh, so word of warning!

 

[Chocolatelover123]

Having an awful day of sickness today can barely keep anything down, had to call in sick for work but feel terrible as it’s the second time now for morning sickness. Does anyone else have this guilt I actually threw up during a meeting (thankfully on teams) but still feel guilty taking the rest of the day off

 

[angelicajames]

I’m trying to research c-sections and if I can give anyone advice, please DO NOT visit midwifery.org.uk absolutely horrendous - I’m not even that sensitive but now I want to get the whole site cancelled.

ETA

I think the first couple of first hand stories they have on there should be removed or moved to the bottom as they are SO negative and alarmist - they really upset me! There’s not much balance to them tbh, so word of warning!

I had an emergency section in 2017 and I was horrified researching them to decide on an elective for this time. At the end of the day everyone’s experience is different, just like a vaginal birth. Don’t let horror stories put you off if it’s want you want. I’m opting for another as the pros out way the cons for my situation.

hopefully ladies on here can reassure you! The only major negative I can think of is the recovery time, but that could be the same with a horrible 3rd degree tear anyway!

 

[GlennCoco]

I had an emergency section in 2017 and I was horrified researching them to decide on an elective for this time. At the end of the day everyone’s experience is different, just like a vaginal birth. Don’t let horror stories put you off if it’s want you want. I’m opting for another as the pros out way the cons for my situation.

hopefully ladies on here can reassure you! The only major negative I can think of is the recovery time, but that could be the same with a horrible 3rd degree tear anyway!

I'm the same as you, ended up with an emergency csection after being in labour.

Had some complications post surgery but tbh they were nothing compared with what I went through prior to the section.

I'm having a section this time and I will not be persuaded otherwise

The pros definitely outweigh the cons for me

 

[WeHadFunRight]

I had an emergency section in 2017 and I was horrified researching them to decide on an elective for this time. At the end of the day everyone’s experience is different, just like a vaginal birth. Don’t let horror stories put you off if it’s want you want. I’m opting for another as the pros out way the cons for my situation.

hopefully ladies on here can reassure you! The only major negative I can think of is the recovery time, but that could be the same with a horrible 3rd degree tear anyway!

I had an emergency section in 2018, but I am looking at an elective; I just wanted to look for something that talked about the pros and cons clearly… but that site is a nightmare, if you’re feeling anxious already it’s like a pit of despair to sink yourself into. I suppose what the collection of stories highlights is aftercare and PTSD counselling after emergency or crash sections can be really important - I mean there’s women saying they didn’t believe their child is theirs! A bit bonkers really that it’s been collected together as an article.

I am thinking I’ll book a section and baby can decide whether or not she wants to come out before that date or not, otherwise at least I know there’s a plan for getting her out, even if there’s a bit of a longer recovery - but like you say, bad tears can be the same. Thanks!

 

[Hotel_breakfast]

I had a vaginal birth 3 years ago with forceps, episiotomy and a 3rd degree tear. (Baby was in a very funny position, overdue so had to be induced, waters broke with meconium in them and babies heartrate was going erratic as I pushed!) Then I had a post-partum hemorrhage and had to go down to theatre quickly for stitches. Recovery was awful, stitches got infected and I had low iron for ages afterwards. I will be going for a C-section this time round for sure!!! And avoiding that website so thanks for the heads up.

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

I had a vaginal birth 3 years ago with forceps, episiotomy and a 3rd degree tear. (Baby was in a very funny position, overdue so had to be induced, waters broke with meconium in them and babies heartrate was going erratic as I pushed!) Then I had a post-partum hemorrhage and had to go down to theatre quickly for stitches. Recovery was awful, stitches got infected and I had low iron for ages afterwards. I will be going for a C-section this time round for sure!!! And avoiding that website so thanks for the heads up.

Are you me? I had a very similar birth and the recovery was not great but I think I will still try for a vaginal birth this time. Even though I’m spending lots of sleepless nights shitting it about giving birth again. Tbh either way is not looking appealing to me

 

[WhatABore]

Are you me? I had a very similar birth and the recovery was not great but I think I will still try for a vaginal birth this time. Even though I’m spending lots of sleepless nights shitting it about giving birth again. Tbh either way is not looking appealing to me

If it's reassuring. I had a 3c tear and bad hemorrhage with my second. Awful recovery. It terrified me. Took me over 6 weeks to even be able to stand up for more than 5 minutes.

My 3rd, had a small tear downwards and a bit upwards, however, it wasn't bad at all.
No hemorrhage.
And I was up and about 2 days later.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

I had a section with my first, and despite the emergency situation I had a very positive experience and I'm booked for another this time.

I think it's like everything else; people are always quick to complain about their negative experiences, but not so much when things go well. It leads to a very unbalanced view on the matter unfortunately.

 

[Hotel_breakfast]

Are you me? I had a very similar birth and the recovery was not great but I think I will still try for a vaginal birth this time. Even though I’m spending lots of sleepless nights shitting it about giving birth again. Tbh either way is not looking appealing to me

We had a birth debrief afterwards and the consultant said she would support a C-section for my next birth. Both me and my husband had a lot of trauma after it, I was separated from my baby for a while and didn't get to give her her first feed until 4hrs after she was born! So for both me and my husband a C-section is better for us. I was also 12 days overdue so knowing the day would be nice my friend also had a 3rd degree tear but overall a positive birth experience so is going for vaginal for her second, it's a very personal decision. I have said to my husband though I wish he could take a turn for the 2nd baby!

 

[Juststopit]

I'm in brain fog town today.
I was just worrying about having not felt baby move lately whilst he was actively moving

 

[Hushpuppy]

Hi ladies, I am utterly exhausted. I am 11+1 today and have a 14 month old. I take a nap everyday when he has one and I'm due back to work soon. I have NO idea how I'm going to cope! Even the thought is exhausting.

 

[definitelynotvlad]

Whichever way you to choose to give birth in the U.K. is essentially safe, elective CS carries a slightly lower risk to the baby but slightly higher risk to the mum, however these are known risks so can be mitigated against to some degree. Vaginal birth when it works out is great (although I very much remember wanting to punch my friend who said my birth was “lovely” - IMO there’s no such thing there’s just better or worse), but there’s so many unknowns with vaginal birth that I can completely understand why someone who has had a previous poor experience would go for an elective. Women need to be properly supported to make the right decision for them, not coerced through fear into choosing what a health professional thinks is right for them. They aren’t the ones who go home and live with the long term mental / physical consequences of whatever that choice may be. Basically it’s your right to choose what type of birth you have, within safe limits (eg you couldn’t elect to have a section at 34 weeks just because you fancied it, but you can elect to have one at 39 weeks), and don’t ever feel judged or pushed into a decision you’re not comfortable with.