Putting my twopence in on this. Does she really believe that not restricting him food means she’s making a rod for her own back. What she’s actually doing is making food something out of reach, something that is glorified and what will happen is the poor kid will binge food eventually and end up with the same crappy eating habits and weight issues she has.
I have young kids and one is sasssy with the tantrums, it is exhausting but that’s being a toddler/preschooler, they’re learning and aren’t cognitively mature. I am and can regulate as an adult so it’s on me to control myself around how they behave, not control them and be a dictator. As parents we are mentors and role models. If you want your child to do something, lead by example. They copy everything!
I would never ever restrict food just to prove a point. She’s so draconian with the way she treats them, then she’s online to seek out validation for her actions. She absolutely should feel bad and be crying (I doubt she is though) The kid is 2, he’s still a baby and she’s acting like he’s a teenager that’s nicking stuff and needs taught a lesson. He wanted to eat fruit and also have something filling like his sister was having with her… call in the bleeping police feebs!