Thank you for the further detail. I’ve seen the book mentioned here and it sounds interesting, I may give it a try. And thanks, doing my best with kicking the booze!! I’ll keep trying.
I’m not surprised at the detail about Paula doing anything, to the point of sedatives for sexual activity with Michael. It’s clear that she was obsessed with him — perhaps the kindest way to put it is besotted, as for much of their time together, Michael did clearly have feelings for her. But I think together, they were a dangerous combination of personalities that weren’t good for each other at all. Paula’s decline is so sad to read about in retrospect when you know how it ended, and hear more about all the things that happened along the way. As well as losing Michael, it sounds like she was very thrown by the revelation of her true parentage and the arguments with BG and everything else got on top of her. I don’t think she meant to die, but to me she was in that mode where you feel too much, and yet you are unfazed by the serious & real risks of what you’re doing. I was struck by the fact I read here that PY was only 41 (by coincidence, my own age now); having been a feature of TV for so long and with four kids and a lot of life lived, it was easy for me at least, to forget she was barely middle-aged when she died.
It’s truly upsetting to think Peaches was even younger than that. The world is a different place after your mother dies (or it was for me), she was only a child when she lost hers so suddenly and that will have had its impact. 25 is a strange age in my view— you are out in the world, and you think you know what you’re doing, but when I look back, I’m not sure I really did know, and I understand the world and myself better now (still figuring it out of course, as we all are). How sad that the mistakes Peaches made at that kind of age included one she couldn’t come back from.