One Day of Winter

[FraggleRock]

I can't believe she filmed Raven whilst she was upset and then said "I want to be there for her, not filming her", is she for real?!

She’s an utter twit!

My daughter loves routine, it helps her little developing brain figure stuff out.
If we have a late night due to an event or something, she loves it but wants to know when bed time is.
I agree it can be happy, it gives them some control in a world so big.
As for dressing her for tomorrow - it's pure laziness. There are no cues, poor kid won't know what's going on.

Routine is good for kids, they like consistency! My little boy hasn’t been himself for the last couple of weeks with lockdown happening and it’s because he’s not in his normal routine! Pea seems to think that letting her child do what she likes when she likes makes her superior - when it’s clearly not and obviously biting her in the arse now Raven is waking up at stupid o’clock and she’s complaining she’s tired. Having a routine for your child doesn’t make you a lesser parent and is certainly not something to turn your nose up at!

 

[xlxjxbx]

The clothes thing is really bad! I can't believe anyone would be willing to admit that, or actually film their child wearing the same clothes for two days in a row (including to bed).

There is 3 of them - their washing situation cannot be so bad they need to get as much wear as possible.

 

[Tiredtiredtired]

I do worry a little about her she does look really pale and tired. I think she’s trying her best it’s just strange to show so so much

 

[TheLastLolo]

Just seems to be literally anything goes as long as there's no tantrum because Nicola is so desperate to make 'gentle parenting' look like it's generates perfectly behaved children. Nope. Raven is just like every other toddler. She doesn't want to do what she doesn't want to do... But some things have to be done and they get over it so quickly anyway, what difference does a little strop make?
Every night at my house, it's bath, clean pyjamas, a drink and then bed. My son (who I think is a few days older than Raven) asks for pyjamas now, he knows what it means and he winds down from then on. I like to think I'm fairly relaxed but he does get told no and he has lovely manners, he's very imaginative but he isn't left to destroy my house daily... And he's still happy and healthy.

 

[Justherewithmypopcorn]

I've always thought they were a bit scruffy. Like their house is ALWAYS messy, even when shes at home all day with 1 child (I have 4 and my house isn't a show home, but its tidied and cleaned daily) . That step thing that raven climbs on was NEVER cleaned. It used to make me cringe seeing it, germ ridden. Just get some antibac and wipe it after shes been cooking. Failing that, use a pissing baby wipe like every other mother on earth.
They moved in that beautiful new house and from day one there was just tit lying about everywhere. I'm FAR from OCD, but god, that house makes my eye twitch

AND PUT YOUR KID IN SOME CLEAN CLOTHES YOU LAZY MARE !

 

[TheLastLolo]

This makes me want to go back through her grid and watch the decomposition of her house...

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

Do we know if her house is a semi? I've just finished work and come home to bed. I would not be amused if next door woke me up in the early hours because they took their kids downstairs to play.

I wonder what her family think to the way they live. And Dean's family, and any friends they might have.

 

[Cat_scratches]

It's a 3 story terraced townhouse I think.
I know the area and most of the houses are like that

 

[Tessiebear]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I feel the same - I feel people need to earn the right to see photos of my wee girl, they need to show compassion and actually ask about her before I feel they should see her.

But then again perhaps photographs help with wider understanding amongst people who’ve never had to deal with such a bereavement, breaking the taboos, ignorant attitudes and even fears about what ‘forever babies’ do look like. So fair play to people who choose to do that. There’s nothing at all pointing towards mental illness or a ‘disorder’, just the sheer love and pain of a parent.

I’ve spoken on here before about One Day of Winter and really don’t want to unduly criticise her parenting, but I feel there’s a line to be drawn between being permissive as a conscious parenting ‘strategy’ and feeling compelled to have the child centre stage at all times, simply because they’re here with us and their sibling sadly is not.

Thank you. You’ve put it beautifully and I feel the same.
It’s a privilege to be shown such precious photos and I’m selective in whom I share them with but fully support others showing the world as they are so proud of their beautiful babies
I’m so sorry for your loss also. It’s absolutely horrendous isn’t it
Also feel the same about Nicola - heart breaks for what she’s been through losing her little boy but doing herself no favours with the lack of a basic routine and boundaries.
I guess she must feel so overwhelmed with what happened that she hasn’t the energy to discipline or even add structure to Raven’s life. Yet the fall out from this is a million times more exhausting long term.

 

[TheLastLolo]

Is she a bit stupid? She can't work out why raven slept 15 hours? Erm... Because she had about 4 the night before?

 

[Cat_scratches]

Yeah, it's totally not a mystery

 

[TheLastLolo]

Seriously what is the point in some of her stories?
The paddling pool is a hit but I can't show you... I'm sure we all understand what it means.
I've put sun cream on my child but it's not even that sunny, aren't I magnificent? Don't you wish you were as good a parent as me?

Oh cock off.

 

[Rainbownotts]

Well just an idea Nicola/Pea pour yourself a large glass of gin go and lock yourself in the bath for an hour and leave Dean with Raven. Problem solved.

 

[TheLastLolo]

Well just an idea Nicola/Pea pour yourself a large glass of gin go and lock yourself in the bath for an hour and leave Dean with Raven. Problem solved.

Cut the umbilical cord and let him in then... He's been pushed out for so long, I'm not surprised. Nicola makes herself the centre of Raven's universe because that's what Nicola needs, not what Raven needs. Her somewhat selfish 'gentle parenting' is backfiring early...

 

[justfortonight]

Well just an idea Nicola/Pea pour yourself a large glass of gin go and lock yourself in the bath for an hour and leave Dean with Raven. Problem solved.

See this is what amazes me about her. Between this and the dicking about at 2-in-the-bastard-morning - HOW does she stay calm? I’d be mainlining wine into my eye sockets and screaming into a pillow in despair.

Is gentle parenting just putting up with everything? Not moaning ever? It sounds dreadful, I don’t know how she does it.

 

[EmilyChambers]

I mean?! Really?!

She's really this stupid??

 

[Rainbownotts]

See this is what amazes me about her. Between this and the dicking about at 2-in-the-bastard-morning - HOW does she stay calm? I’d be mainlining wine into my eye sockets and screaming into a pillow in despair.

Is gentle parenting just putting up with everything? Not moaning ever? It sounds dreadful, I don’t know how she does it.

It's not meant to be but most the people on that group do.
I got sucked into it when my son was 2 but hated how judgemental they all were approaching mums who tell their kids off in public. I realised it wasn't for me but stay in the group just for fun.

 

[Justherewithmypopcorn]

See this is what amazes me about her. Between this and the dicking about at 2-in-the-bastard-morning - HOW does she stay calm? I’d be mainlining wine into my eye sockets and screaming into a pillow in despair.

Is gentle parenting just putting up with everything? Not moaning ever? It sounds dreadful, I don’t know how she does it.

Laughing. It really does sound dreadful.

 

[TheLastLolo]

Get ready guys! Shouldn't be too long until we get the nipple shot with her deranged smile floating above it.

See this is what amazes me about her. Between this and the dicking about at 2-in-the-bastard-morning - HOW does she stay calm? I’d be mainlining wine into my eye sockets and screaming into a pillow in despair.

Is gentle parenting just putting up with everything? Not moaning ever? It sounds dreadful, I don’t know how she does it.

This. For me, being a decent parent means making sure my little boy's belly is full (even if some days it's full of snacks), keeping him clean, keeping his clothes and shoes in the right size and in decent, clean condition, trying to teach him something new every day but not fretting if I don't and trying to keep a routine going, along with obviously keeping him safe from harm and loving him.

It doesn't mean never saying no, it doesn't mean talking like a moron, it doesn't mean neglecting myself to cater to every single whim and it doesn't mean allowing a tiny person to destroy my house. If that makes me... What's the opposite of gentle parenting? Then so be it.

 

[HerFromInTheMiddle]

I’m all for talking to children about nature but is there any need to point out the insects are mating ! Oh no a threesome