I still can't believe he told that one person the other day to go into a deficit of 600-800 calories "but not more than a 1000", without knowing ANYTHING about that person. Who does he think he is in general to give out advice like that? Maybe that person has an ED and is now following his advice. Seriously WTF is he doing. This is so dangerous.
Niomi Smart #37 I'm NOT an Influencer...Get Me Out of Here!
- Start date
-
- Tags
- Niomi Smart Threads Wiki
- Status
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
This is my impression of the thought process of one of Niomi’s fans watching her latest reel:
- Ooh sustainable self love queen Niomi Smart and Dreamy Bradley have posted a reel from Mauritius, their lives are so enviable - I bet Joe is absolutely livid rn
- Wait a second! What’s this? “When you realise you turn 30 soon”… oh ho HO! I can’t WAIT to see what classic Nims banter she’s going to come out with now, let’s see
- Ah! I see! The joke is that she’s almost 30 but STILL sufficiently footloose and fancy-free to (i) be spun under someone’s arm and (ii) walk towards a camera! God - someone come and lock this gal up, she is a RIOT - talk about not letting your break up bring you down! #inspirational
- oh hang on, here was me thinking that was QUITE enough hilarity for one reel, but what’s this? Bradley is going to pretend to pull his shorts down?! HA HA these two!!!!! What are they like!!! Almost 30 but so FUN!!
- I’d better leave a comment, here we go: “
perfection!!! ”
- Ooh sustainable self love queen Niomi Smart and Dreamy Bradley have posted a reel from Mauritius, their lives are so enviable - I bet Joe is absolutely livid rn
- Wait a second! What’s this? “When you realise you turn 30 soon”… oh ho HO! I can’t WAIT to see what classic Nims banter she’s going to come out with now, let’s see
- Ah! I see! The joke is that she’s almost 30 but STILL sufficiently footloose and fancy-free to (i) be spun under someone’s arm and (ii) walk towards a camera! God - someone come and lock this gal up, she is a RIOT - talk about not letting your break up bring you down! #inspirational
- oh hang on, here was me thinking that was QUITE enough hilarity for one reel, but what’s this? Bradley is going to pretend to pull his shorts down?! HA HA these two!!!!! What are they like!!! Almost 30 but so FUN!!
- I’d better leave a comment, here we go: “
perfection!!! ”he’s an ignorant idiot who has zero humility and has convinced himself he is better informed, better educated and generally more amazing than he actually is
At least you are not trying too hard.
I was in England a few times, but never noticed you must show your butt to be considered fun. I met only boring Brits I guess. Sigh.
I was in England a few times, but never noticed you must show your butt to be considered fun. I met only boring Brits I guess. Sigh.
Last edited:
Yeah, that's why I'm saying their story doesn't add up.
duck me, why are they so cringe. She wants so much to be seen as sexy and carefree, but doesn't pull off the act because you can tell how hard she's trying lmao
By any means Nimbobs, don’t take turning 30 too seriously, but maybe lose the chav 
by your side to be taken seriously…
Bet a certain Joe is watching these stories and sighs of relief
by your side to be taken seriously…Bet a certain Joe is watching these stories and sighs of relief
They remind me of my kids when they were little. My son liked to pull down his pants too when he was 2.
I honestly wonder if Joe's parents are relieved he called off the engagement. Based on her current shenanigans, I'd be surprised if they wanted someone like this as a DIL.By any means Nimbobs, don’t take turning 30 too seriously, but maybe lose the chav
Bet a certain Joe is watching these stories and sighs of relief
I guess I’m not a funny gal, because I really don’t understand her sense of humor. When exactly am I supposed to laugh?
It really looks like two immature, bored AF morons not knowing what else to do than drawing attention, because they’re so uncomfortable with each other and literally have not one talking point to share.
Meanwhile, Joe must definitely feel terrible about dumping her. What a sad loss!
This is what we are looking for
...I secretly hope that around her birthday Joe will make a reveal of his new lady 
imagine what would happen then ? If she is showing her arse now, she will go full cardi b or something ?This is the 30 !
By the way, is it really necessary to walk backwards to show her ass for the umpteenth time?
Besides, she still complains through her caption
yeah you’re turning 30 and you’re so unhappy and frustrated about it, we get it! If only you could put your thinking cap on for once and do something about your miserable situation. Sitting still, counting your blueberries and waiting for a new handbag from Dior is not helping!
Besides, she still complains through her caption
yeah you’re turning 30 and you’re so unhappy and frustrated about it, we get it! If only you could put your thinking cap on for once and do something about your miserable situation. Sitting still, counting your blueberries and waiting for a new handbag from Dior is not helping!
I don't know about you guys, but I'm so relieved...I'd almost forgotten what her arse looked like. Days were dark, and nights, darker. So to see those half-full wanksocks of fleshy entitlement--sorry, buttocks--wiggling towards me on Instagram was deeply comforting. I can rest easy now. Nam-ass-te, my friends.
I don’t understand people who need to sexualise themselves with the firm idea that would make them more interesting or appealing. It’s like they only exist by showing their skin and arching their back in some undoubtedly retouched photos. Either you show your boobs or your ass like that, the result is absolutely not sexy, it’s coarse.
Tanned, but still passive-aggressive, still complaining, still miserable.
Tanned, but still passive-aggressive, still complaining, still miserable.
Last edited:
I'm so tired of seeing her half-naked. Please, woman, put some clothes on, no one, and I repeat NO ONE, wants to see more pics of you posing in your bikini or grandma briefs in the middle of the day, no one cares if you're tan or not. Find something meaninful to do before you burn off those last IQ points you're still holding on to.
These morons should be parodied by Celeste Barber but unfortunately, they're too irrelevant to be on her radar.
These morons should be parodied by Celeste Barber but unfortunately, they're too irrelevant to be on her radar.
Sorry to bring this up again and apologies if someone made the same point already. I am in the process of catching up with the threadI can’t believe it. Forky’s q&a is just another SM strategy - and he is actually speaking for both of them, like they are some kind of power couple of instagram. Acting like teenagers as always... do they even have a real life outside social media...
I am 100% sure his team « sent » the questions
View attachment 1065049
But what in the actual f*** is he on about? How can he actually believe a single word coming out of his mouth?
"The majority of the 100000 people who were watching my stores on a daily basis were inspired by our holiday to book and enjoy Mauritius." The dude pulls just over 10 thousand likes on his best day for a post on Instagram. And Niomi has an engagement rate of under 1 percent for most of her posts. So people don't even feel "inspired" enough to even press a button because they like your picture but they will jump and book a trip because you went on a pr trip there? Keep dreaming, buddy.
His GET IT DONE account on instagram also has less than 10 thousand followers. What is up with that Forks? I mean, do the 100 thousand people a day not feel inspired to sign up for the instagram profile either? And that one is free. And how many paying customers does his GID stuff have? Not a hundred thousand I am sure.
The delusion to think that all the people, or at least a majority, who watched their stories are actually considering going to Mauritius because of them is baffling to me. Most people do not make these kinds of decisions because of a story by someone. Sorry to burst his bubble, but you're not that impactful. A big part of these story views are from people who pity the poor staff that had to look after them, the team who rescued them and the people stuck on a plane with them in their cloth masks.
And even if someone felt "inspired" (what a waste of a word on this clownery) to go, the majority of followers of theirs watching, won't be in a position to pay a cool 1000 Euros a night to stay where they stayed. And if it's all so damn inspiring and wonderful, why aren't their friends and family members on the next plane there? I mean, those are the people who would most trust their opinions and care about their stories, right?
I can't with this absolute tit show of a response from him.
- Status