Niomi Smart #27 from selfish to shellfish

[coriander]

He definitely asked himself this Q - he's so icky and sweaty and pubey - don't ask why, he just is!! Haha.

Pubey

Has she even got a TV???? Does she even watch telly....because that would mean her having to stay at home, which she refuses to do it seems.

 

[AnnaMel]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

 

[Sheabutter]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

I got teary eyed reading this. Water is wet, dimbobs

 

[judgejohndeed]

‘Girls’ Niomi you are almost 30, give me a freaking break

 

[lilamay]

Gifted a ton of soaps today

 

[Miyab_S]

Haven’t watched Niomi for ages, but just caught up on the new house vlogs, couldn’t help but think how ill she looks and would describe the video as a hot mess! Guess all that yoga, meditation and vegan lifestyle is taking its toll, she seems miserable!
what happened with her and Joe. I wondered how he put up with her to be honest.
also found the new house a bit strange and disappointing perhaps she should of moved a bit closer to her family as she probably needs some support

I know! She looks so much older it's like she's aged 4 years in just one. I don't know if it's the blond hair or just the break up that did that to her ?

 

[imsorryabtthisacct]

I'm just gonna go ahead and guess that this needed 9 screws.

 

[Shutterbug99]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

Where's Forky when you need him?!

 

[cowsgomoo]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

On the beg for a boyfriend she can force to do it for her, I see.

 

[sitkx]

Remember when she moved in to Joe's flat and straight away started rearranging the place to her taste. Freddie's record player literally disappeared.

The shelves when she moved in:

View attachment 799996

After her 'rearranging':

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this makes me severely uncomfortable it feels like she’s the author of a self-insert fanfic

 

[Sheabutter]

On the beg for a boyfriend she can force to do it for her, I see.

Literally! She invited her photographer and her photographer’s boyfriend over.

 

[Ms.Marble]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

Tell me you usually have someone else do all the hard work and just stand idly by without telling me. How can someone so blatantly advertise that they're in fact no help to anybody.

Shocker, marble is heavy. Who would have thought. In other big news, feathers are in fact light.

 

[Blobpy]

I wasn't going to log in but Forky just gives me so much content for this thread.

Quite sure if this was a legitimate new love interest, Forky wouldn't be doing her dirty like this:

View attachment 792851

You've got Duchess Dimbeaux pretending that she's on a hot weekend getaway with Forky and Forky retaliates by posting a solo pic of himself with the gifted car (it's a major red flag if he's actually prioritising a gifted car over you, Dims) and then a slo-mo story of her looking like crap in the wind. Well played, Blue Steel, well played

Does anyone know where the dress in this picture is from

 

[Shutterbug99]

Does anyone know where the dress in this picture is from

I think it's Forever New.

 

[toanna1]

Does this mean Niomi is NOT his type?

I think this is him telling her without actually telling her she is not it this description is exactly opposite of dimbobs is ! Yawn!

Niomi , soon as she saw that story opened the packages which was lying in a corner and whipped out a screw driver , see I fixing my tit now forky
She was using this as an excuse to get him do it for her on a Friday night, but you know that was a fail !

now tyat she put up a story of her fixing tit but can’t actually do it she invited her friends over ! So that Next time forky visit , she will go like look forky I fixed it all by myself

 

[uhhhhhhcanwejust]

Oh God; seeing them side by side is next level of cringe…how are they not embarrassed to be posting this rit

These are so uncomfortable! At least the one lady had snacks and looked somewhat cozy. Maybe we should have zoomed into see if Niomi's popcorn was on the floor, under the sofa.

 

[heyguyssotoday]

Is she serious? How incompetent one can be?

Tell me your daily workouts aren't doing anything for you without telling me your daily workouts aren't doing anything for you.

 

[Callan]

Why does she post these whiny stories, does she really think that they make her more relatable? She should just hire a butler already so they can step on each other's toes in her garage fish tank.

 

[bumblebee212]

"Oh Rheeett, do come over and help this fragile, helpless girl out, would you, I just CAN'T lift this maahble with my tiny lady arms, daahling"

 

[milanolo]

I think this is him telling her without actually telling her she is not it this description is exactly opposite of dimbobs is ! Yawn!

Niomi , soon as she saw that story opened the packages which was lying in a corner and whipped out a screw driver , see I fixing my tit now forky
She was using this as an excuse to get him do it for her on a Friday night, but you know that was a fail !

now tyat she put up a story of her fixing tit but can’t actually do it she invited her friends over ! So that Next time forky visit , she will go like look forky I fixed it all by myself

On the contrary, Dimbo probably coyly blushed upon seeing that story because in her head, she fulfills every criteria on that list:

Maturity: Forky, I mature. I buy house.
Having your tit together: I buy house. I build table today too.
Ambitions & goals: I marry up and make pretty babies. I travel the world while pretending to be sustainable.
Knowing what you want: No bread.