Nicola Bulley #12

[DellaC]

Yes absolutely. I’d eventually like to add sections on
Peri Menopause
Menopause
Alcohol use - personal and family support
Mental health support
Missing persons

If others are in agreement?
And of course anything else deemed appropriate

I have littlest at home now until Tuesday but I will definitely be able to get it done properly next week.

I think regardless of what happens with the search for Nicola, the wiki can remain as a source of info for anyone who needs it x

I honestly think that would be fantastic. Let's try to make this into a positive and provide much needed info for anyone who is triggered by this emotive subject.

Well done DH...you're a diamond! X

 

[SmudgeTheCat]

Oh please don't talk about that. I still hyperventilate when I think back. Imagine an expert in the field of mental health trolling an absolute belter like me.

It's despicable

To be honest I’m surprised someone who works in mental health even has one of these accounts?

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

Would people mind sharing screenshots of articles instead of links please? Only cause it’s the click traffic (and advertising money) that makes these scummy papers behave like this. It’s tempting but if we didn’t click they wouldn’t make money off it and be rewarded for their journalists invading peoples private lives.

That’s a great point, and I’ll add that into the next recap as a reminder

 

[BigMavis]

I still don't know what to think. Have calmed down a little over the menopause and alcohol issues but I want an even playing field going forward. I'd like to know MWTs and Fauldings sperm count and fertility status, how much they drink and if they're taking the little blue pills. Fair?

 

[Boring Monday]

Why does he think this is a positive thing?

Because he’s a complete melt.

 

[Toffeebythesea]

Spoiler: TW : not about NB but about menopause

I dont want to derail but I'd feel awful if I didn't say this as there's been a lot of discussion around menopause so it's relevant IMO.

I'm sure you may know this but i certainly didn't and may have saved my step mums life by sharing this with her.

Bleeding after menopause can be normal but it also can be a sign of something more sinister. If you're menopausal, it's so important to report any bleeding to your doctor.

If anything, I at least hope this whole situation helps raise awareness for people struggling with menopause (for example, i'm sure that menopausal leave is something that's being pushed for at the moment isn't it)

 

[Merpedy]

That’s a great point, and I’ll add that into the next recap as a reminder

Archive links might be better just to stop the thread clogging up with pictures?

 

[Snoopylouwho]

Couldn't quote this as thread closed.

I appreciate her face has been blasted over every web page and newspaper BUT she is just a normal looking 40+ year old. She looks like me and my friends. If she dyed/styled her hair would you really notice her and notice it was NB?

I'm not so sure.

 

[50sGirl]

Because he’s a complete melt.

You spelt melt incorrectly!

 

[Boring Monday]

I still don't know what to think. Have calmed down a little over the menopause and alcohol issues but I want an even playing field going forward. I'd like to know MWTs and Fauldings sperm count and fertility status, how much they drink and if they're taking the little blue pills. Fair?

I don’t want to think about either them in that context, to be fair.
I want to keep me tea down.

 

[DellaC]

To be honest I’m surprised someone who works in mental health even has one of these accounts?

I was a bit surprised that he/she was actually so aggressive with it. I can't say being called a dick off a stranger on the Internet upset me, but it might of done. Yes I'd posted jokey tit but I had also posted sensitive stuff. I do feel very sad by this case and I know many others do. He/she could even absolutely said it to the wrong person and triggered something not very nice.

You'd think someone in MH would know better??? I smell a rat haha

But this is Tattle and although we've built up a lovely (in the main) thread, you're still going to get the odd troll.

 

[avabella]

I still don't know what to think. Have calmed down a little over the menopause and alcohol issues but I want an even playing field going forward. I'd like to know MWTs and Fauldings sperm count and fertility status, how much they drink and if they're taking the little blue pills. Fair?

I know right? When you put it like that, it really is COMPLETELY ridiculous that this has been splashed everywhere. I am so mad for her, and this whole situation - a treasured mummy, sister, partner and friend reduced to a bumbling, menopausal drunk.

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

if this is indeed true, why this hasn't come out before?

(I’m way behind on catching up so I am sorry if this has been asked and answered)

Why should it have come out before now? It’s no one’s business but Nicola’s - and the police of course if relevant to the search.

 

[SmudgeTheCat]

I can see how a sudden withdrawal of treatment would cause horrendous side-effects. HRT patches have been transformative for me.

I have followed this case so closely. Firstly because I've almost completed my postgrad in psychology and there are just so many questions. Secondly because I think nobody wants to believe that someone could go out for a walk and just disappear.

Something I find really perplexing is the fact that there was an article claiming that NB suffered from both bipolar and depression. I've taken a screenshot of this from Google, the article was published on 03/02 and has subsequently been amended. This begs the question, if this is indeed true, why this hasn't come out before? What is the truth behind her mental health and why now?

Because like the menopause and alcohol situation, is no one else’s business. Someone has had to make it everyone’s business by being a complete low life. No one has to tell people their personal issues

 

[50sGirl]

Oh yes. Mark Whata-twit.
Absolutely no turmoil caused by you then?

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Does he think this covers him in glory? He’s deluded. It just shows him for what he is.
He forced their hand. I hope he realises the pain he has caused to her loved ones.

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

I just want to say this, I’m new to these threads, followed the news etc but ofc this is more informative and reliable.

I have to say everyone has been SO respectful and kind, even when I’ve asked things that may seem stupid because I hadn’t read all other threads. So thank you all.

You definitely did not ask if the dog was wet then

 

[SkiesOfBlue]

2) HRT…. Well I have made a right song and dance about HRT. Didn’t want to go down another pharmaceutical route as I try my hardest to stick to supplements etc. BUT… my menopause was just dragging me down. Hot flushes, aches, pains, bloating but the actual worse one of all is the brain fog. I’ve actually wondered if I’d got dementia and I still do as my memory, clarity, understanding and organisational skills have just gone. It really is horrid. So I’m giving it another go. I haven’t seen any improvement yet. The only side effect is really painful boobs, very similar to pre-menstrual or when breast feeding. Not nice at all we I’ll just try for a few months and see.

You really have my sympathy. For me it was anxiety, completely irrational tetchiness and just feeling utterly pants. How long have you been on the patches? They do take a little bit of time to work so give it time. I remember my boobs being positively pneumatic to begin with but that settled down. If it doesn't you could review dosage with your clinician. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[Boring Monday]

Couldn't quote this as thread closed.

I appreciate her face has been blasted over every web page and newspaper BUT she is just a normal looking 40+ year old. She looks like me and my friends. If she dyed/styled her hair would you really notice her and notice it was NB?

I'm not so sure.

I think her community seem very supportive - they circled the wagons and didn’t breathe a word to the press. I think if she came back they would continue to protect her. The media soon get bored.

 

[Longtimelurker10]

You definitely did not ask if the dog was wet then

Hahahah no that wasn’t me

 

[Multi-21]

Couldn't quote this as thread closed.

I appreciate her face has been blasted over every web page and newspaper BUT she is just a normal looking 40+ year old. She looks like me and my friends. If she dyed/styled her hair would you really notice her and notice it was NB?

I'm not so sure.

I walked past a playground earlier this week and I’d never really noticed before but all the mums had on padded coats that finished somewhere between their knee and their ankle, big sunglasses, ankle or calf high black boots and carried a reusable coffee mug from home. It was actually like some unwritten uniform which I’d not noticed until all the talk about what Nicola was wearing.