Coffee Moaning for Tuesday. The title is "Tyrone Mings vs Priti Patel, LONDON FLOODS AND SHOCKING KIDS COSTUMES & CONCERNED BORIS." As Lady C says, let's plunge right in.
Faffing with the camera angle and head being cut off. Nads says she took down her Insta pic in the England bikini. She doesn't want to feel unpleasant. Nads asks us how we are all feeling and asks Mark. Mark doesn't feel good. Loads of chatter bitching about their lot. Zoe graduated her management class. Ruth wants to clean her whole house. Newbie intro. Mark says they will be doing series for the channel. Nads says they are going to do a surprise thing related to take-away food.
Ripping off another idea? Racism chat. Nads says the girls were very upset last night. Mark is ashamed to be English AGAIN. Mark says that we (you) think we are the big I am. Talk about the people crashing the gates at Wembley. Nads says it looked like "a rogue, lawless state." Mark mentions there was a sexual assault at Wembley.
Thanks for that. This is so cheery. "These were middle-aged men!" People being kicked. Tyrone Mings is Nads' hero. Mark calls Priti an "arrogant fucker." Talk about her bullying. Talk about her criticizing the taking of the knee and then blasting the racist tweets and whatnot. (Honestly, I find all these gestures just window dressing. Why are English/British people aping something that is a uniquely American gesture? It's an overblown purity test.) Mark is on his soapbox. Nads hammering the fact that Priti was a proven bully.
Another word that has lost its meaning. Mark says this isn't all conservatives.
No, really? Mark cites Johnny Mercer, former Conservative minister, saying that modern conservatism was always so much more to him.
Nads had to reassure the girls, that there were loads of people supporting the footballers who were racially abused. "If they got those goals in, they would have been heroes." Nads doesn't understand Priti Patel doesn't understand racism what with her being Asian. (She probably doesn't identify herself as "the Asian chick" and just gets on with it, so why can't you conservativism. Not all people beat the drum about it.) Nads says she feels depressed. Mark calling racists
bleeping stupid, ignorant. Izzy says that Priti Patel's ethnicity is her Get Out of Jail card. Nads tells us that Mark's mental health has been
tit, adjusting to the meds. Nads mentions sexual abuse going around and the person attacked by the machete on the tube.
(Do you feel like slitting your throat yet?) Leeeeeeeeeee's here and says that Football leads to women, people of colour and gays being attacked, it is all worth it.
(You know, people are losing their homes on the west coasts of Canada and the US and they are doing their typical middle-class liberal minded, bourgeois struggle sessions. STFU! ) Maddie said her black friends were spat the night of the football and they apologized to her for it happening.
Mark starts listing off all the words he can say about the situation-barbarism, stupidity, ignorance, moronic, brutalism. "Have we not progressed from the Vikings and Anglo-Saxons clubbing each other?"
Nads:"What the
duck? This is 2021!" Nads goes on about Britain and its relationship with alcohol. Mark tells her to not say that or you are a killjoy. Mark makes mention of a meditation he listened to this morning, told him to listen not react to the meditation. "We all react." Nads says they will do a COAMP on worrying about your kids' future. Mark says there should be an announcement from Boris on the situation. Drew asks about the Loose audience, Nads has no info yet. Gemma asks if it is lockdown. Nads says fear, lockdown, drink, lack of education, communication. (Why hasn't Boris said anything? If
tit goes down here, you can bet that the gov't would be reading the public the riot act over the behaviour. Having said that, they were slow to say anything when churches were being burned down and the statues being toppled.
Where is the leadership? It's like the world has been rudderless for 10 years now. I will shut-up now.
Ugh they are influencing me Tattlers! ) Flip of the hair. Mark says not all people who voted for Brexit were racists, but all racists voted for Brexit.
(I think you can be a racist and still support the EU. ) Mark says the Brexit vote sanctioned racism. Mark divulges his 23 and Me results, he is a good portion Scandinavian and Asian and that all people are an amalgamation. (US comedian Conan O'Brien is like 100% Irish Mark.
) Mark is lecturing on racism and if I was paying for it, I WOULD WANT MY MONEY BACK.
Someone mentions they don't know where the country will end up. Minky Moo says why would they support England with black players. Mark says that is an exception. Bloody hug time. Nads wants a breath, a little moment. Coffee machine whirling. Nads goes onto floods being horrendous in Notting Hill Gate. Nads did a show Accidents Happen, talking about the devastation of flooding. "Have you seen the footage, people's belongings floating around?" Marks asking about how they didn't predict it. (Well, it has been raining like the blazes here and that might have been the remanants of Hurricane Elsa blowing through.) Nads tells us the story of her uncle taking the H out of Sawalha, because people would get annoyed with the name, having to pronounce the H, SawalHA as it is pronounced in Arabic. She connects that to the apology from Marcus Radford. Happy birthday Stephanie. Mark says a bunch of schoolkids in India got electrocuted during a storm through their phones.
Pitchfork is getting released and Nads is astonished. Bev Berry and hubs' anniversary. Beatrice is getting her ukuele strings. Nads wants to hear sparks of joy, her's is making a roasted tomato and garlic soup and it will be in the NNSS. Mark is going to work for the next 8 hours. Becky has new pots for her plants. Mark says Oscar has won 5 best acting awards for his film is his spark of joy. Kay says baby blackbirds fleged today in her garden. Talk about the dogs and their issues. Today they will find out if Chi Chi can come home. They will be quarantining the dogs "You will be pleased to know" says Mark. Chi Chi still has a bleed behind the eye. Happy birthday Julie. Stephanie's spark of joy is a friend calling her. Mark says "
bleeping hell that's gorgeous." "Why do we have to swear?" "I don't know, but I apologize." Ooooo. Tamara fried bananas. Jojo Dixon has hedgehogs back in her garden. Nads tells us Taylor Swift is in the Med Sea. Happy birthday to Lisa. Mark says to Drew he will be seeing Norfolk vlogs. FYI, their pamphlet on homeschooling is in paperback now.
Nads is trying to find news from the WHO (UN org, not The Who.) The chick from WHO said about Wembley, "Am I supposed to be enjoying watching a superspreader event of the Delta variant." Nads:"Well, yeah." "It was like watching tranmission happening in front of my eyes" said the WHO woman. Nads says "At the end of it all, we had racism, violence, what was the point of it?"
MONEY! Mark says that there were people without tickets in ticketholder seats, who were afraid to confront them. (
WTH went on there? Sounds like a free for all. 
) Boris said the protocols were followed and Nads looks like her head is about to pop. "It's like he thinks we have a
bleeping paper bag over our head!"
Next story and Nads is shaking her head saying "You are not going to believe this." So a London library was holding a reading event to get children to read, they hired these actors from a company called Vision. At this point, Mark interjects and asks if he can reveal the name of the perform all giddy and such. "Prepare yourself, because you are not going to believe it" says Nads. One of them dressed as a multicoloured monkey "but it had a penis on the costume. A full size penis and nipples...
and a bare bottom!" The library condemned the event, but earlier they said on the website if you've got it, flaunt it. Mark says they will have known the name of the act, which was called "
The Rainbow Dildo Butt Monkey."
"You are kidding me."
Can you imagine that? Sounds like an alternative band, like the Butthole Surfers. Nads asks if the children enjoyed that, does a monkey have a penis hanging down usually. Mark says no. "That is actually ridiculous."
"Morons. Absolute morons." Mark shows us the pic and well, the make-up job is amateur and the costume looks like it is made from the odd bits of fabric you had for crafting in elementary school. Nads says when she told Mark this story, he usual has an opinion, but his face was frozen. Wonder Woman says imaginative at least.
Nads says that if this is the first time here, it isn't usually this doom and gloom. Someone mentions Naked Attraction. Mark says they are doing a Naked Running for the younger crowd. "What is going on at Channel 4?" Nads is doing a Q&A today on body acceptance live on YouTube.
Will she be sober? HIT THE SUBSCRIBE AND THE NOTIFICATION BELL. Happy birthday to .... Well it was supposed to be 10yo Louis, but the feed cuts out. That's All Folks!
www.dailymail.co.uk
in today’s CM they are selling their family reality show and they are going to be “doing sort of series and themes and all sort of stuff” and we are in for another surprise apparently concerning takeaways 
don’t some of you watch a guy who rates takeaways? Surely they will not plagiarise this
wouldn’t put anything past them, they have no creativity, no originality.
