Mumsnet #38 imagine spending £100 on a notebook and writing 'bleach arsehole' in it

[Girl#7]

@TheDragonWithAFlagon

I tend to avoid the food-related threads on MN. However, I am interested to know the hive-mind status on horseradish and jalapenos. Good? Bad?

If I were a betting woman (I am!), I'd be inclined to put my money on: 'Bad'.

 

[ShopTilYouSlop]

Now I'm confused because the spunk comes from above too? They said they put it in after sex as advised by other people to stop the dribbling

Ah, I haven't seen it so I misunderstood...but still, that's insane! Unless you insert it while lying on your back it's all still going to come out...and even doing that won't guarantee to keep everything in. And it won't absorb it very well because it's not the substance it's designed for.

If you can't deal with that happening, a condom is the best bet.

 

[Freda Fandango]

I have to say, that one had me until the text message.

Me too. I loved the poster Myrtle who noted that the characters were Jake Kiera and Lewis and wondering about the dripfeed for the M character.

But there are folk reading the first message only and giving sage advice. Then a few popping up and taking the piss.

 

[Sunlifeover50]

Annnnnnddddd I've been banned from MN. They have lost sight of what a real troll looks like

what did you do?

 

[Brandshinynew]

My mum's in hospital at the moment and keeps moaning about how large the salads are but how small the main meal portions eg cottage pie are. I had to bite my tongue to stop myself saying about the MN massive salads & how "we've lost sight of what a normal portion is"

Hope she gets better soon.

 

[Itsmeagainat]

Oh, is it another "nobody who is truly in love spends more than £2.50 on their wedding, I got married in a car park wearing a carrier bag" race to the bottom?

I find that phenomenon so odd. They're obsessed with class, they'll have flame wars about supposed class signifiers and who is highest up the social system, yet the subject turns to weddings and suddenly you can't be cheap and crap enough. Nothing at all wrong with a low key wedding, of course, but that's all it is: a low key wedding, not proof of the quality of the marriage. Why is that? Is it because weddings are thought to be a true class signifier and they're pissed off because they couldn't afford St Paul's Cathedral and a £50k dress of fairy wings and unicorn tails?

I hope this is not too off topic but it reminds me:
The class system is a staple of and deeply embedded in British culture and history even when the education system a middle class person's grandparents were working class, people prefer to be thought of as 'better than other groups of people in society.

 

[Millie2023]

No email, no nothing. Just banned
Thing is, I was just gently taking the piss out of the usual suspects trotting out the usual bullshit. I wasn't making up stuff for sympathy clicks or begging for money (which don't get banned or deleted) I wasn't even being offensive even though there was some hideously offensive stuff on that thread.
Still, they can't stop me. I have a million throwaway emails and a VPN

Have some more examples of my work...

You bloody genius

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Ooooh there's a thread in Style and Beauty about a Me and Em dress and someone has come along and linked to Batsheva and other Batshita dresses that are NOTHING like the original dress. I mean, WTAF . It's like a handful of posters have a word document with all these rank dresses linked on that they copy and paste into MN when anyone asks about dresses.

There are no words . . .

 

[girlinbrum]

Haha nicely done, least you've exited in style!!

 

[Cheddar Chalpupa]

Someone on this thread commented that mumsnetters are really a size 18 with boring jobs rather than size 8 with high flying six figure careers...it reminded me of this clip, she would so be a mumsnetter esp with her bad reading comprehension too. And there's quite a few on there I've read who claim to fall in love with their postman that i can imagine them stalking...

Haha of all the things for him to pull her up on - she told him 3 times she did an ordinary degree, it's pass/fail Piers! Even I know that and I don't have a photographic memory and did not go to any university.

 

[ShopTilYouSlop]

Annnnnnddddd I've been banned from MN. They have lost sight of what a real troll looks like

What happened?

I thought they usually did a week's suspension first?

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Tell them you once saw a tray of hearts in the butchers window.

I wish I'd thought of that! Brilliant!

 

[Itsmeagainat]

I hope this is not too off topic but it reminds me:
The class system is a staple of and deeply embedded in British culture and history even when the education system a middle class person's grandparents were working class, people prefer to be thought of as 'better than other groups of people in society.

*Even when the free education system leveled out people's prospects, a middle class person's grandparents were working class,.....

 

[ZanzibarDreaming]

Not sure I can even bring myself to click on the ‘why are there so many autistic kids now’ thread to play ableist bingo

I accidentally clicked on it. I think my bingo card was full after about 3 posts.

 

[CrimsonCountess]

'to think having to pay maintenance is unfair' in aibu has to be made up surely

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

I only read a bit because I couldn’t believe how boring it was. Basically the OP bought a house from an older lady and had no idea it came with a garage that was full of her neighbours shit and an allotment/ piece of land. When they went to look at the allotment there was a woman sat in it. Woman doesn’t want to leave and all sorts of bat shittery ensued.

we moved a few years ago and the conveyancing process was crazy. I honestly can’t see how it didn’t show on the land registry and they didn’t check it out before completion.

I also lost interest after the first couple of pages.

But all that I can say is - it's lucky they don't keep guns in the house.

 

[Brandshinynew]

I

Have you seen the one about the OPs husband crying on the sofa in his ‘house coat’ because his lifestyle forum has been shut down?

the OP has responded she’d be upset if tattle got shut down but she’d get over it…. So random

I thought it was a tattler tbh.

 

[Allthatjaz]

A mumsnetter has been baking…

Oh that's classic number isn't it lol God they really are thick.

 

[Bird Lady]

I’m surprised the toilet queue post hasn’t been posted here yet.

 

[ShopTilYouSlop]

Popcorn at the ready!

I guess the fat Brits on the cruise thread filled up too quickly.