Mumsnet #37 Wipe down my cucumber and sanitise my Hovis, I need to get my dicks in a row!

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I must admit I ate far too much curry last night. I wish I could say I don't regret it, but I really really do...
 
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We've moved on from fatties bringing the DNHS to its knees. It's now women wearing heels that costs them millions
 
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MN probably costs the NHS millions by encouraging eating disorders, mental health issues and domestic violence.
 
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What are we supposed to wear? Pretty sure most women are wearing heels to make themselves feel good and not for the titillation of men
I couldn't care less what men think. I've never asked any man what he thought. I just love the way they look and feel and I love that people are astounded I can walk, dance and jump onto a train in them. They're not everyday wear, occasional, but when I wear them, damn do I wear them.

I've actually never asked my husband if he likes them! Maybe I will....
 
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What are we supposed to wear? Pretty sure most women are wearing heels to make themselves feel good and not for the titillation of men
I have those leg muscles where everyone keeps stopping me and telling me I have marks on my legs when I wear heels . Good job I hate the fuckers and can’t walk in them anyway. Only wore them as a teen to please my mother who thinks “a little heel” is classy.

I own three pairs of shoes- nike’s, Haviana’s, and DM’s. Sorted for all occasions
 
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What about fatties wearing heels?
Fatties wearing heels cost the councils millions and millions a year in damage to pavements and potholes. It is no wonder our Dcouncils are on their knees! Make fatties pay double council tax I say! They take up 2 or more times the space of normals. They use twice the amount of food of normals, therefore generating double the wastage and aforementioned damage to pavements.

TAX THE FATTIES!!!111111!!!!
 
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No more fucking cauliflower base ‘pizza’.

Has to be a contender for the next thread title.
 
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The reason those fuckos don’t wear heels is because didn’t they all reveal they climb the stairs on their hands and knees or something equally insane? Hard to keep a stillie on if you’re still crawling aged 39 3/4.
 
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I must admit I ate far too much curry last night. I wish I could say I don't regret it, but I really really do...
I always eat too much curry when we have one. Omg if I lived in the east , I would end up 30 stone
 
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Does anyone else have a pre-breakfast breakfast?

I'll got into the habit of having some cereal when I get home. Then after I've washed n changed I'll make a proper breakfast usually avocado and toast, or eggs n beans, and cuppa to get my day started.

Think I should let DNHS know.
 
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Forget DNHS. Barbara from Swindon clapped every Thursday so that saved the DNHS. You need to be letting the coroner know instead.
 
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The reason those fuckos don’t wear heels is because didn’t they all reveal they climb the stairs on their hands and knees or something equally insane? Hard to keep a stillie on if you’re still crawling aged 39 3/4.
If they are 39 3/4 they are far too decrepit to be crawling up stairs. That is so elderly that they would surely be using a stair lift
 
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Forget DNHS. Barbara from Swindon clapped every Thursday so that saved the DNHS. You need to be letting the coroner know instead.
Maybe we should be clapping for coroners now? Obviously only after we have updated our notes to the coroners.
 
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I’m breastfeeding at the moment and have transformed into a swarm of locusts disguised in a highly challenging human figure I’ve moved a box of snacks into my bedroom so I can eat something before I even go downstairs to eat my weight in breakfasts. My apologies to the dNHS!
 
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