Mumsnet #37 Wipe down my cucumber and sanitise my Hovis, I need to get my dicks in a row!

[DCICassieStuart]

When I got married, I had the "Big Day", church, reception, bridesmaids, 150+ guests etc and I didn't enjoy one minute if it. It was dictated by my parents. I had friends that I wanted to invite and couldn't because my parents were inviting distant relatives that they hadn't seen in years instead.
Rows over bridesmaid, rows over best man, rows over food etc etc.

I'm in the process of getting divorced now and if I ever get married again, my partner and I have said that we'll go away somewhere and just have his two adult children, their partners and his grandchild.

 

[Serene Serena]

When I got married, I had the "Big Day", church, reception, bridesmaids, 150+ guests etc and I didn't enjoy one minute if it. It was dictated by my parents. I had friends that I wanted to invite and couldn't because my parents were inviting distant relatives that they hadn't seen in years instead.
Rows over bridesmaid, rows over best man, rows over food etc etc.

I'm in the process of getting divorced now and if I ever get married again, my partner and I have said that we'll go away somewhere and just have his two adult children, their partners and his grandchild.

I've heard a lot of people say the same about their wedding day. If I got married now, my mum would definitely insist I invited all my cousins who I haven't seen since we were kids, and her friend Eileen because I was her bridesmaid when I was 5, and Eileen's second husband and his kids, then my mother in law would have wanted all their side of the family invited too - there's not a lot to be said about the pandemic, but being limited to 15 guests for a wedding was wonderful for us.

 

[YR80]

Was that in the 1950s or something?!
I spent about £3k and was quite chuffed with that. Twas a small wedding though.

Me and my husband (aka DH) went to a registry office to get married. We then hired out a private room for a tiny reception (think 7 people). Our wedding was about £500

We did do an ‘proper’ wedding reception afterwards with all the accepted bits (speeches, meal, sweet buffet), and that was about £3000.

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

i had the big wedding when I married my 1st husband, I had the church wedding and big reception in a village hall with open bar. That marriage lasted 6 years. Married Mr B at Gretna Green, just us and the kids while we were on holiday in Scotland with 2 strangers as witnesses. We've been married 19 years this year.

Dunno if that really means a lot, but I much preferred the 2nd wedding (and the 2nd husband)

 

[Girl#7]

The site is such a bore now, threads constantly deleted because they’re created by trolls and 100 people took the bait.

I've only been on that site for about one year. It's so repetitive - same issues - where no-one appears to search for previous threads where advice/information has been provided.

I only read threads mentioned on here or where they do not relate to (my top ten):

• Here are 15 clues my DH/OP/BF is cheating on me. Is he cheating on me?
• My parents are spending MY inheritance! What should I do?
• I am paid too much and have no idea why others are struggling. Why are YOU struggling?
• I have a fantastic BF who earns an average wage. Should I ditch him for the billionaire who has fallen heavily for me based on one photograph of me?
• My children as sooooo gifted. At age 8, they have progressed from crayons to pencils. Anyone else with almost equally gifted children?
• My PFB is heading to uni. Apart from the three bed house and car we've bought them, the cleaner we've employed and the £3k per month spends (to exclude foreign travel which we will fund separately) is there anything else we should provide?
• The NHS is shite. They don't tolerate lunatic my demands. The NHS is shite. The NHS is shite. Anyone got contact details of PALS and an indication of much money I will get for the NHS being shite.
• I hate all children, except my own who are models of perfection++++ in everything - stunning good looking, extremely popular, academically brilliant, Olympic standard sportspeople, musical proteges etc. Why don't others produce children as wonderful as mine??? Is it my and their father's superb genetics? Could it be just that we excel at parenting? Or both?
• I'm exhausted. My elderly mother demands far too much attention. She wants me to visit for an hour (sometimes more) per month. She could could afford a great nursing home but I'm reluctant to arrange this for her. How do I deprive her of capital to ensure the taxpayer picks up the tab? (Not too concerned about the legality of this, just want to make sure I get as much as I can out of the old goat before she's carted off to a crummy home where I can forget about her and free up an hour per month to use on life admin.)
• Why am I always being asked for ID when I'm 48? I know I'm v.v. pretty, teeny-tiny, and enchanting in a child-like way, but WHY are they asking for ID????

As a breed, I'm beginning to loathe them.

 

[DCICassieStuart]

Me and my husband (aka DH) went to a registry office to get married. We then hired out a private room for a tiny reception (think 7 people). Our wedding was about £500

We did do an ‘proper’ wedding reception afterwards with all the accepted bits (speeches, meal, sweet buffet), and that was about £3000.

If my partner and I get married with just us, his kids and grandchild, we might have a reception/party at a later stage, but only for about 20 people, close friends and family. A barbeque or Chinese or something like that.

 

[Serene Serena]

I've been reading what I think is a full-blown fantasist's thread I worked with many celebrities over the years AMA
A few people are cynical but most are gushing over how much an airport worker knows about various members of the Royal family and rock stars and taking every single thing she says as the truth.

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

I've been reading what I think is a full-blown fantasist's thread I worked with many celebrities over the years AMA
A few people are cynical but most are gushing over how much an airport worker knows about various members of the Royal family and rock stars and taking every single thing she says as the truth.

Yeah I think that one is a load of tit too, but I think most of the AMA's are bullshitters. Call me horrible, but I think the prostitute one from the other day was made up.

For so many 6 figure earners, they certainly lack critical thinking skills

 

[Serene Serena]

Yeah I think that one is a load of tit too, but I think most of the AMA's are bullshitters. Call me horrible, but I think the prostitute one from the other day was made up.

For so many 6 figure earners, they certainly lack critical thinking skills

I thought the prostitute one was fake too. She just had very expensive straight sex with middle-aged men, it was a little bit like Secret Diary of a Call Girl, and nothing like (I would imagine from what I have read) real life prostitution is actually like.

 

[bread-pitt]

I had the ultimate anti-MN wedding. Just us and two witnesses at the home of one of the witnesses. We decided on a Wednesday to get married that Saturday. No photographs. No flowers. No cake. No reception. No children! No alcohol. Wore clothes we already owned. No honeymoon. There were more guns in the room than people.

 

[veronica71]

On the can you recommend a cool kettle and toaster thread. I thought £30 was pricey for a kettle

 

[Vroomvroom]

My wedding was everything Mn hates, was 13 years ago in a big hotel, cost over £20k and had 130 guests. I had a brilliant time and would do it all again in a heartbeat!

 

[50degreesnorth]

Wait what? You can if you’ve a brass neck bill the bride for your frock! I’m going to become a professional guest, wear an ikea TUI sized duvet cover , but bill for a sister wife dress! 6 figures + 25 3-course meals in just 25 Saturdays!

 

[TenerifeTigger]

I booked an overnight away with Mr T before our first was even born! At exactly 4 weeks old she went to my parents and I got pissed.

 

[sistersofpercy]

My DD gets married this year. Both her and her partner hate the idea of a full reception, don’t drink and don’t want the fuss. They’ve booked a tipi for 22 guests, all ending at 8pm and includes everything except the registrar fee. It’s about £3,200 from memory but that’s with food, photos, decorations and the honeymoon suite etc.
I know she’s budgeted £5k and not a penny more and is bringing it in under that.

I did ask if she’d rather a big expensive affair but she told me she’d prefer a new kitchen awfully pragmatic that girl.

 

[CrimsonCountess]

I've heard a lot of people say the same about their wedding day. If I got married now, my mum would definitely insist I invited all my cousins who I haven't seen since we were kids, and her friend Eileen because I was her bridesmaid when I was 5, and Eileen's second husband and his kids, then my mother in law would have wanted all their side of the family invited too - there's not a lot to be said about the pandemic, but being limited to 15 guests for a wedding was wonderful for us.

My mum tried to do this with us. I actually did the unMumsnetty thing of growing a pair and telling her it was our wedding, we were paying for it so it was our choice and if she wanted to invite relatives I’ve not seen in 15 years then she could throw her own party to do so! It didn’t go down well

 

[sistersofpercy]

My mum tried to do this with us. I actually did the unMumsnetty thing of growing a pair and telling her it was our wedding, we were paying for it so it was our choice and if she wanted to invite relatives I’ve not seen in 15 years then she could throw her own party to do so! It didn’t go down well

I wish DH and I had stood up to our mothers. We’d originally planned registry office, pub meal for close family. Then the mothers got involved and whilst we didn’t end up with a sea of bridesmaids etc we did get a village hall full of people that neither DH or I had a clue who they were. My main memory was us spending the night asking each other who that was and if it were your side or mine.
we’ve said if we could go back we’d bugger off to Vegas.

 

[notanotherusername92]

Oh I have a mn double wedding whammy.

Next door neighbours daughter has booked her wedding based on the expectation of paying for it out of inheritance.

They got engaged the week after relative died, and have now booked for a 5* hotel in August. They’re asking guests to book and pay for rooms in advance.

Only issue- probate only just been granted and from what she was saying the executor is crossing every T as it’s quite a complicated will.

I am betting that the money won’t come through until at least 6 months after probate is granted, if not the full executors year.

I am waiting with popcorn as they can’t afford any sort of wedding without the money…

 

[Thank(space)you]

Some of us have never been married because our OH doesn't exist think of that you heartless vipers

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

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On the can you recommend a cool kettle and toaster thread. I thought £30 was pricey for a kettle

£193 for the leaning tower of bogey?! What the duck!? (I'll admit I actually rather like it but it's about 6X my acceptable kettle price).