Mrs Hinch #693 What happened to your black phone?

[Erm…erm…erm…cos i love it]

I feckin hate lazy parents who always make out their kids miss out on sports or activities because they are at this and that appointment- ffs prioritise he isn’t going to die of autism (boredom maybe but not autism) and pick an activity that fits with therapy, it’s not rocket science you plank. One of my kids was sen with speech delay, the other autistic - we did homework’s in the car, we ate in the car, got changed for different activities in the car because they were never going to miss out on activities with friends - that’s far more valuable than sitting in endless speech therapy (imo) - both kids at university doing brilliantly! The best thing you can do is put that diagnosis to the back of her head (there should be plenty of room)

surely most appointments would be 9-5 Mon-Fri and most kids clubs are in the evening after school or weekends, like you say lazy parenting!!

 

[GossipgalK8]

Aye, that much of a zelebrity he ain't even pictured or mentioned pahahahahaha.


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I've never seen such a list of z listers, wannabees and has beens.... this beyond cringe.

 

[Swedish chef]

This is so true! When she was with Tesco the tat was so overpriced so she did make some decent cash. Tried getting herself into high end brands like you say and failed miserably. So even if she does have a range coming out with HB its not going to generate the kinda cash she was used to. HB is known for cheap items. Plus, apart from some lovely little bits, most of it can be utter crap and extremely poor quality. Their soft furnishings are the worst. They are good for cleaning products, hair care products etc but not home wear. She will have a very rude awakening concerning income from this.

If the Home bastards Collab happens then I want to see all the hunnnzzzzzz with their Homebastardsxhunchedover banded candles with tags/ribbons attached never to be used just for best tagged pictures. Will pay extra bonus points if a hunazzzzzzz takes the candle to the beach for a photo op
---

Just leaving this here…….
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Hopefully that includes him

 

[VicksterIcon]

Henry was a fat puppy too - not surprised!

 

[Swedish chef]

Guyssssh, I decided that if Mrs “Toot Toot, Beep Beep” Hinch can have her half a name on a HB lorry then so can damn well I

So I’ve spent the day….

1) I recorded myself wanking all of the taps in my house…and even the one in the garden (Our elderly neighbour fell off his ladder watching, blesssh’is’arrrt) We don’t have an elderly neighbour

2) I faffed about tend cleaning already clean things everywhere, while flicking around my hair and playing questionable music…. recording myself of course

3) I made spaghetti hoop pie Vomfesssht for dinner, with fake cake bake for dessert

4) I ordered a life size cardboard cutout of Audrey Roberts from AmaZZZON, put a dog lead on it and left it at home while I went out for a walk

5) I borrowed my sister’s 2 dogs and along with my own dressed them up as the 3 floofhead Camels

6) I dressed my cat up as a chicken, but couldn’t round up anymore catsssh, so I’m just focusing on Pringle…. my cat slept all day, no henpecking from him

7) I made Mr Owl wear grey joggers, a white vest and a backward baseball cap….to be honesssssscht I made him change immediately as I felt sick and I’d quite like to get fruity with him again at some point in our lives

8) I dressed my 5 Owlets as tend-toddler-Quintuplets truck manzzzz driversssh, even my newborn baby.

9) I myself wore padded arse leggings and an off the shoulder torn top….along with white socks and outside fucking around Home Bargains slippersssh… oh and a Dryrobe covered in chicken shite

10) I left a message for NobNose Mario that we’re now bestbubs4eva I most definitely did not

I then contacted Home Bargains with the photos and they literally jumped at the chance to have “Owl Bargains” on their lorry, in fact I even saw them stripping “Hinch” off the poor bassshtard lorry they have hidden away in the corner of the yard…..

But, alas I told them I’m fankyou but no fankyou, as I’m not a twat with an overinflated ego, or a narc, and I’d never pimp out my Children, Husband or my animals. ATV

You just need me to come over in me slsssssslipppers with the McDonald's and begin a BFF narrative that will end with me stealing all you tend content and signing you to me management team so they can cock block you, while I swan about chewing with me gob open, gurning and shoving the mini older swedes in the outhouse, ok bubs?

 

[HereToTalk]

So at these places you decorate 4 cupcakes each. 4… 4 cupcakes for Ronnie who allegedly won’t eat them. Not being funny but is that fun for a 5 year old? To decorate cakes that you aren’t going to eat, where your little bro does the same and eats them and will get praised for that?

 

[katesbess]

After watching that video of the boys dressed the same again has made me realise why I think she does it. Because they are two very spoiled little boys. I reckon they fight over everything no matter what. She can't control them or is able to parent properly so has fallen into a trap of having to have them dress the same, same toys, same everything. This is only going to get worse as they grow. Silly cow. Those boys are ruined.

I don't believe whatsoever that a follower sent her that picture of the wanky truck. Best get used to tend posts like that.

They didn't appear like they are well behaved did they.
Unsafe toxic household there. No "walls" to lean against. And a toxic mother. The boys are fucked.
That story on Easter tend sort. Feck awwwwwf. Yawwwwwn. It was almost like she was in slow motion the amount of fueling over herself to try create some content

 

[Swedish chef]

Sorry, I know I do this every so often but these next couple posts really should be my final photo dump of Mrs Hinch screenshots and recordings! I promise
I need the space back on my phone but don’t want to delete for ever, so using Tattle as storage

A grade OG IG twunt since 2018

"Is Soph.a.lazy and unimaginative with her children or b. is she a victim of her stunted childhood?"

Essay must include examples to support both views and I'm looking for 1500 words minimum.

If you really can't be bothered,just answer a or b.
This will secure you a pass but opinions will earn stars.

I'm very busy watching mumazzzzz make Yorkshire puds from a purchased pre made frozen traditional family recipe. Do I have to list all references or can I just use the Oxford standard instacunzt plagiarisation format?

 

[purplethesurple]

The thing is she’s either bragging about not making her bed, or she’s lying about it. I mean honestly. What a life!

lying

 

[pugqueen]

Trash ....fuck off.

 

[JustmeJ]

Are we sure this isn’t a private b&m budget vow renewal, she’s so extra it’s embarrassing

Mwahhhh ha ha brilliant

 

[easeypeasey]

It's interesting isn't it that the sheep didn't want to see photos before she became famous?
Like when she was a sales woman, getting pissed on a boat and posing with an inflatable penis? It was all from a controlled period of time from when she was living in greyskull being a "cleaner".

Ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaa

 

[MickeyMouseClubhouse]

Surely this Mess's 'thing' has well expired now. It's not about cleaning you're hope etc it's all about showing off?

 

[ChunkyMonkey90]

So in 6 hours all she's reposted is that same reel. She's so boring. I just wish she would fuck off!

 

[AllieBee]

As she is wandering down memory lane,I don't think I'm too off thread
Just been using some "spray wipe done"(I never by one with her name on" and I noticed this- remember her "tadahh" lists?-who plagiarised who or did she sell out to PandG?

P and G must think all their customers are the sort of cretins who follow Hinch!

 

[Lipglossaddict]

I saw this and thought it was weird how every time she writes to herself she uses a name with an x and then realise it was Rozanne and not Roxanne. Last time it was Maxine

Definitely the same handwriting...look at the letter I when referring to herself.
What a twat

 

[influencerbore]

That photo of Jamie shaking hands with her dad makes it look like Alan’s just sold her.

I was just thinking the same thing

 

[DoodlePoodle]

Has she fucked off then?

 

[springheeledyeti]

Apologies if I have unintentionally plagiarised!

You haven’t hunnayyyy, unless ‘a friend’ ‘text you’ what I said ages ago

 

[☆MagicRoundabout☆]

Did you ever get hauled home by your earhole by the local "parky"

Haha!!! The copper nicked me first, the boiiieez buggered off, but he caught up with them taking me home. He looked a bit like Inch from what I remember. Beard, beady eyes. Didn't get caught at Liptons mind, we even sang "Didn't we have a luv-e-ly time, the day we went to Liptons!" to this old cunty tune: