Hey Brums this is bloody fantastic! Have I missed something about the mortgage or is that just for the purposes of the song?And in today’s edition of the Hinch sings Christmas advent edition we have ……..
Hinch Mansion is a no go
Jamie’s gambled the deposit away,
The bank’s computer said no
Tattlers now laughing all day
“Jamie I’ll have to pawn me wedding ring,
We’re bleeping skint you lazy shite”.
What fun it would to be able to see
The tit going down in Chez Hinch tonight, oh!
Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Faking it all the way.
Oh what fun it is to find
You mortgage declined with “no way”, hey!
Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Fuming all the way.
Oh what fun it is to find,
Your husband’s blown 10 grand on Bet Play.
Now Soph’s face is deathly white,
She had dreams of cleaning alpaca dung.
Bestie Stace is in her mansion tonight,
Whilst Soph’s dream has gone all wrong.
In Maldon she will have to stay,
Might have to start dealing weed ,
There’s a morbidly obese dog to feed,
“Jamie, upload your CV to Indeed”.
Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells,
Soph’s dream house gone astray.
Oh! what fun it is to find,
The mortgage application was denied, hey!
Jingle bells, jingle bells,
All the best by the way.
Oh! In Castle Greyskull you’ll have to reside,
And another source of Insta content you’ll have to find,
Mrs Hinch #466 Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz, But the very next day, you edited it away
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Hey Brums this is bloody fantastic! Have I missed something about the mortgage or is that just for the purposes of the song?
Well today my voice is seriously husky so at least I’d stay anonymous
That Jamie short for James is a dirty bastard
And at 10pm!
and don’t think my mother has ever been in my house at 10pm!
does that woman ever go home to her own house?
We had some tea spilt by someone who said their friend overheard her getting turned down for a mortgage at the brokers office.
Bet he’s soaping up fiddles minkeh
Noticed the Moses basket in the back as well…You know I said earlier that Ronnie was allowed to paint his little ornaments? I just rewatched and can’t believe how naive I was. She has splodged green paint on one, yellow on another and he’s been given a loaded blue paint brush to splodge for the duration of that story.
I always buy my two neighbours across the street a bottle of baileys for Xmas so was well pleased when I seen it! The other 4 bottles is 2 for me and 2 for “spare” cos I sure by duck will have tanked the two bottles within the next 2weeksRaced to the tesco website hot time when I saw this.. the disappointment
Sorry but how is testing and smelling a new cleaning product an actual job.
I’ve written a song for my kids too
Make the beds, with Christmas bedding
Thanks to mummy’s amazon-ing
A beautiful sight,
We’re cosy tonight
Snoozing in a covid wonderland
Positive lateral flow tests,
Here we stay, in isolation
Waiting for PCRs
How unlucky we are
Snoozing in a covid wonderland
They don’t find me as funny as you lot do though
Make the beds, with Christmas bedding
Thanks to mummy’s amazon-ing
A beautiful sight,
We’re cosy tonight
Snoozing in a covid wonderland
Positive lateral flow tests,
Here we stay, in isolation
Waiting for PCRs
How unlucky we are
Snoozing in a covid wonderland
They don’t find me as funny as you lot do though
Ol Ma must have stayed the night seeing as she was there at 10pm, looking after the kids yet again today because Jimbobnoknob has to chaperone Hinchy in London because she’s such a baby and can’t go anywhere on her own
Has been raining all day more or less!
I bet she absolutely hates having to go to these brand partner things when it’s for cleaning stuff she would rather it was for fashion (even though she has none) or make up.
Even though she never shows herself “cleaning” anymore she still can’t shake that label off in the words of Lee from Blue’s girlfriend she will always just be “that cleaner off Instagram” and it bleeping kills her
she would rather it was for fashion (even though she has none) or make up.Even though she never shows herself “cleaning” anymore she still can’t shake that label off
in the words of Lee from Blue’s girlfriend she will always just be “that cleaner off Instagram” and it bleeping kills her 
Exactly, Hinch keep in scrubbing and stay in your laneI bet she absolutely hates having to go to these brand partner things when it’s for cleaning stuff
Even though she never shows herself “cleaning” anymore she still can’t shake that label off
Ah I have a theory about that! And about the baby seats on the high chairs.
If the ‘set’ stays the same she can use all her pre-records. So the Moses basket, high chairs, the baby bath with the blanket in it. It’s all props.
I bet she’s swapped the boys‘ chairs into the next stage but we just haven’t seen it yet.
Don’t worry, she’s got plenty of ‘outtakes’ on her phoneOne of my kids was a whirlwind as a toddler, I needed eyes up my arse.Now I love seeing my (private) FB/Google photo memories pop-up of our funny, inquisitive, mischievous child.
Take a bit of advice from an old troll Sophie, they're not small for long, don't let your memories of Ronnie be just Insta posts, you will regret it.
Known to any other mother as normal photos of your beautiful children.It’s hard at times, and frustrating and tiring, but you grow so much as a person being a parent. I totally miss my lot being mischevious toddlers - the chubby cheeks and the belly laughs, and their sweet little faces when they slept. My house is so quiet now they are all at school
Going back to #mortgagegate if she has paid off the mortgage on her current house, she's easily got the deposit money sat in the bank for a million pound manshun , so if the story is true about the computer saying no, it must he because of her unstable job 
I think she’s got enough in the bank to buy a million pound house outright. Or at least almost all of it (maybe trace could rent the loft?)Going back to #mortgagegate if she has paid off the mortgage on her current house, she's easily got the deposit money sat in the bank for a million pound manshun , so if the story is true about the computer saying no, it must he because of her unstable job
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