Mrs Hinch #429 A dummy’s guide to parenting

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Although I think the title should have been Mrs Hinch #429 A Parenting guide by those dummies 😂
 
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Mrs Hinch #429 - A dummies guide to parenting

Winning thread title by @MillionDollarBaby 🥳
(Winning thread titles are taken from page 40 onwards guyshh ATV 👍)

Thursday was a day off because the cleaner comes on a Thursday.
But Friday and she was back with a bang. First we had a Henry and Michael Bolton montage (it’s been too long) and then she informed us that after Wednesday’s face slapping spider drama that Ron loves Spiders. But that’s not all because little Ron “he can talk perfectly fine fank yoo” uttered his first word on camera. Well sort of because technically he was off camera. We didn’t see him at all in fact. Whether it was genuinely Ron, audio trickery or Hinch trying out her new ventriloquist act remains to be confirmed but best bubs Stacey did mention she’d just got back from doing a voice over this morning sooo...
Hinch also has form for dubbing a fake laugh over a video of Ronnie so we await to see what happens next but it’s pretty obvious they’ve been told to be more proactive since he started nursery and they seem shocked that they should be playing and interacting with him.

After all the excitement it was back to the day job. Ads for Teshhhhco disguised as a tend freshen up Friday.
Making the bed, with Hinch bedding and Hinch cushions and a Hinch tray with a Hinch plant on it...cleaning the toaster out by spraying it with toxic elbow grease and hoovering the worktop with the same hoover she uses on the toilet floor, then filling up Hinch water bottles with fruit and water rather than her usual Ribena and shhhhhhhquasshhhhh.

Then it was time for another of her culinary classics as she decided to make Ron some “apple donuts” which was basically diabetes dressed up as fruit but wouldn’t let him eat them anyway. He was strapped in to a high chair, in his bib as mummazzz snatched everything from him as usual and prevented him from doing anything for himself. He didn’t speak at all during the debacle. Not even to tell her and Jamie who were flanking him either side to duck off.

And then it was time for another ad. This time for a home cleaning range from tessshcoooo. She just can’t believe it guyshhhhh! She’s got her very own dussshhhhhtaaaaaa. The range which includes a £4 dust pan and brush is just the perfectttttt colour to go in Stacey’s huge new utility room! Isn’t that so kind! I bet Hinch is frilled!
Ron loves them too guysshhh presumably because he can use the shovel to pick up tend tit.

You may be wondering where Lenblessisart is? No? Neither was Hinch, she’d probably forgotten all about him to be honest, but there was another photo of him shhhhmiling now Fiddle Fingers has dropped him back home. Aww love is art.

Saturday and we were treated to another video of Lennie, awww love ‘im, being poked in the face by the claw with another ridiculously over emotional soundtrack from Hinch and a photo of Ron before they let him out of his barssskitttt for bed from Jamie. The weirdest thing about the photo is that The Hinch actually has a reflection.

Even the sheep must be bored by this shite now surely?

In other news Trace has been getting visits from Inch in the attic and is now preggers. She posted her scan photo to the gram and is still waiting on a congratulations post or even a ‘like’ from her best fwend forevea and eva Hinch to respond...
Not jelly are ya Hinchy?

Oh and Inch posted a link to vote for Hinch in the Fabulous awards
I’m sure she can count on us to vote for anyone except her...

Wiki is the pink button at the top for newbies.
Ronnie and Lennie don’t rhyme.
Sophie doesn’t have a second name she added Rose in her teens.

PS I lost my screen grabs so I’m using my favourite photo of Soph instead
Hope this helps.

View attachment 758283
‘Ronnie and Lennie don’t rhyme’ ffs bunny
Everytime😂😂 someone award this lady
Zoph - it’s not a hinch heart , stop trying to make it so.
Zoph - it’s not a hinch heart , stop trying to make it so.

Stop Tryna make it happen
it’s never gonna happen
 
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Why doesn't that bastard dog just get out the way. It's such a beg. Kid in basket baby in lap, muslin draped and that annoying dog just everywhere in everyone's face. He gets on my nerves. And I literally love dogs. Not more than my kids though because I'm normal.
 
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Why doesn't that bastard dog just get out the way. It's such a beg. Kid in basket baby in lap, muslin draped and that annoying dog just everywhere in everyone's face. He gets on my nerves. And I literally love dogs. Not more than my kids though because I'm normal.
‘It’s such a beg’ killed me 😂😂😂and reminds of when someone on here said ‘even his bark sounds fat’ so true 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

She looks like Janice from Friends….Oh My God..!
😂😂😂😂😂

I still say that kid had stepped on Soph’s footz.

Don’t know how she didn’t manage to avoid them, being a teeny size 5 🤷🏼‍♀️
My fave. Her monster munch super stompers..she’s got feet like fizz from the Tweenies 😂😂 fizz fuutz
 

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SS and Hinch have both been pretty quiet this weekend. Inch doesn't post anymore since Hinch came back to the 'gram.
What is the need to take a photo on the landing with Ronnie in a basket, sorry barrrrskett!
She is just so bizarre.
 
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Sorry if this has been mentioned but I know people wondered if her partnerships were over...

This is her new display in my asda, spotted yesterday 😫 it had been her pink coloured one previously, but over the last few months its just been a general brand one until now!

Why is she dressed as a sisterwife from a cult?!

20210911_184552.jpg
 
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She’s mentioned she’s on sertraline today… is this the first time she’s ever mentioned being on medication for her mental health????? I don’t remember her ever mentioning it before 🤔
 
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Here we go guyshhh, get the violins out, someone’s going to be announcing a move soon.
 
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Why doesn't that bastard dog just get out the way. It's such a beg. Kid in basket baby in lap, muslin draped and that annoying dog just everywhere in everyone's face. He gets on my nerves. And I literally love dogs. Not more than my kids though because I'm normal.
Omg same 🤣 the most annoying mutt ever. He just looks like an arrogant wanker 😅
 
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"We had our families over"...is she implying she actually let Inch see his family? Is this his once a year treat for being a good little Jimbobnojobwipeshiswifesbumbuminnit?
 
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I really wish she would duck off with this Hinch autumn tray crap, who has a tray of rubbish lying around with a toddler & young baby? I wonder whatever happened to her tend moss she used to water as well?
 
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I rolled my eyes so hard I’m surprised I didn’t lose them inside my head... piss off sopha, get off social media if life’s that bad🙄
 
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She's never mentioned Sertraline before has she...that's a first. Bloody hell.
Could be coincidence, but she's posts as soon as we mention she has barely posted.
 
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Not just to say she's on sertraline, but that it's been INCREASED and she's all jumpy (to excuse her face slapping over the spiders I expect)
 
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