Mrs Hinch #238 Better get down to the food bank hasty, the poor need my tasty pastry

[Lynseyp]

Wish she stop banging on about how the online trolls have destroyed her. What a load of bullshit yet again. She needs to know that those who have different opinions to her are not flippin trolls. Grrrr this woman is so thick

 

[Tilly3]

Hey you lovely pastry trolls, how fucking fast are these threads moving, Its hard to keep up as we’re on a lovely staycation in the Lakes, staying in a lovely 5* hotel, certainly not 5k a week and it’s so disappointing that it’s not for sale so we can’t even buy it my husband even asked the owner if he could cut the grass with the ride on and he actually told him to piss off

I keep sneaking a look at Grinch’s stories and
wtaf was all that pastry debacle about, Beggy Bitchell never ceases to amaze me, she’s fucking disgusting making out she donates to food banks but hasn’t the first clue how to, and as for that concoction she made earlier, it just looks like a pickled brain to me

It’s off to bed for me and I’ll have to speed read tomorrow as I’m absolutely exhausted as Mr Tilly took me up the Whinlatter Pass earlier ATV

 

[Jerry Garcia]

Jus Rol chapter in the mem-wah

So guyszs. It was an innocent Wednesday afternoon. I was outside having my 6th fag that hour when I heard the postman at the front door. I puffed my cig and thought 'ah, my ebayers are here. More shite I dont need that I can show off to my skint followers.' I get up off my bench and before I go in the house, I turn and admire my pergoala. What the fucks that! A Daddy long legs! *slaps face*
I walk through the door, Jaymeh is laying on the couch akimbo on his William Hill app. Henry is scratching his balls and Ron is babbling to the P&G cardboard cut out of me I nicked from B&M
I gets to the front door and there's a fuck off big black box. What the fucks this? I open it... nearly have a heart attack 'OH MAAA GAAAAD.' I run in the livingroom and scoop Ronnie up from behind the sofa. I leg it into the kitchen with my box
I whip my phone out. I hardly noticed Ron rolled his eyes. 'Whats this then Ron!!! Shall we open it together!! Oh maaa gaaad I just laaaav it im starstruck guuuys!! What is it Ronnnssss. JUS ROL HAVE GIFTED ME ALL THIS PASTRY. IVE GOT PASTRY FOR 10 YEARS GUYS. FUCK YOU PASTRY TROLLS'
I finish my story. Fuck them ey Ron! I hadn't even noticed Ron had wrestled away from my arms and escaped to the cupboard where he was necking tumeric from the bottle
I pop another fag in my mouth and go and head outside
'Soph! Look! All them Tattle bastards are fuming youve been gifted loads of pastry. Their saying you should donate to the food bank?'
'Huh?' I replied. 'Whats a food bank?'
'Get your coat on now. Leave Ron the cardboard cut out will look after him. I'll throw a load of shite in a bag and take a pic for ya instagram later. Make some shite up on your story asking about the food bank'
I grab my jacket and start sweating writing a post. I ask whether the food banks are still open cos of Covid.
'Is that OK!?!?'
'What the fuck babe! You sound bladdy thick! Get in the car we'll just hurl a bag outside the normal food bank'
'Whats a food bank????'
Jamie whizzes round the corner once we get in the car. His phone rings and he ignores it. Im pretty sure seen 'Freda' on the screen
We pull up outside the food bank and Jamie wings a bag out the window. 'Right take a pic and pretend its yours! Write some shit about some cute woman and then a security guard asking if your Mrs Hinch'
I pull my phone out and film myself chatting absolute shite. Then Jamies phone goes off. 'Freda' again. I post it anyway
My head feels like its gonna explode! I light up a fag and puff it in the car. 'Fuck sake Jamie you can do Rons tea and bath when we get in. Im gonna have to go on a blocking spree. We will fuck Jus Rol off and ill try get a deal with Alpen'

Oh fuck, Megan, I'm hysterical, you deserve Iconic Status for this!

 

[JamiesWillyHillBalance]

Is this book goodbye?

She’s got far too much left on her beg board to pack it in now...

 

[Oprahclear]

“I can’t stop eating it” I should hope not you’ve barely touched it! So 2 grown adults are a few crackers with cheese whilst standing at the kitchen worktop for their main meal?

 

[RogueRey]

Contraversial message

I don't like astonish. Their Christmas hand soap the cranberry one turned my hands red.. the coconut one I used at the start of covid dried out my knuckles, red raw.. it was like a chemical burn.

I wonder if soph will suffer anything like this?

 

[Lynseyp]

WTF is that concoction she's just made!!!! No wonder Vesty keeps disappearing he goes to the neareat drive thru to fill his belly after Gamblers Anonymous meeting as he knows his wife can't cook.

 

[Tootle Pip Wiz]

She's making out like there's some big explosive reveal in her book. Probably shit we already know about, plus a few 'bad' troll tales thrown in.
Poor old Zoph, woe me, I need lots of attention. Just an excuse to rake in even more cash. I'm mean, what the fuck has she done in her 30 years on this earth? It's not like she invented cleaning for fucks sake, or she's the only woman to get married, have a baby etc.
She's not the only one to have been bullied or had bad things said about her either. We've all had it at some point in our lives. Jeez, someone once told me I needed my head kicking in, but I didn't go whinge and cry about it for sympathy.

 

[mgh727]

Was just going to say did anyone see Captain America's shield

Let’s just put it this way, don’t think I’m the only tattler that got a dippy Brie cake from those photos

 

[Poptart]

Sophie if you're reading, your dog is over weight. I'm not being a troll I am thinking of the dogs joints in his old age. Instead of bathing him and putting him in a robe, take him for a proper long walk each day, let him get muddy and run around. Spaniels need lots of exercise it's not fair.

 

[PJ party girl]

Do they ever eat any veg with their "dinners". They just seem to snack. Wish I had her figure and could still eat like Augustus Gloop.

She’s always said she hates fruit - which doesn’t explain the grapes on the plate - but their veg crate only ever seems to have sweet potato and broccoli which Ronnie has a lot. But the lack of veg and fruit in their overall diet is shocking. I love cheese, wine, chocolate, enjoy a little pastry, but hate days where I don’t eat any fruit or veg. You never see Ronnie eat anything like bananas either; my boys loved banana, kiwi, apple and berries at his age, and it’s not like she can’t afford to buy it. Rather than pushing tat from eBay etc, she should visit local grocers or butchers and promote them.

 

[Lemongrab]

So whose gonna take one for the team and get the book read it then summarize/review it here for us all?

Bagsey NOT ME
(Don't think I'd make it past the first page )

X

I actually think someone should do tattle book club just for laughs. Have a thread running alongside this with a chapter a day posted so everyone can read and review

 

[life is great]

Where's the viakal gone for her shower screen? Trying to make out she's all about safe cleaning. She's a sneaky bitch. Shame she couldn't address what happened that poor girl. Plus it's another stolen idea from Scottish jenna. Notice her trying not to screech at Ronsomes all of a sudden to

 

[Cupcakemum]

I had to google the 'cosy tea' concoction. Its a thing, but this is manic witch of Essex, so God only knows what hers will look like!

Also, the recipe calls for puff pastry, not crescent (purposefully spelled wrong) pastry, and only one wheel of brie.

What's for tea Soph?
Weeing from your bum later babezzzz

 

[Egg parcels]

So they are having a pastry dinner...what’s Ron having? Left over spaghetti muffins, an ellas pouch?? Why can’t she just be normal and give her kid normal food, is it too hard for her to get that into her head? At Ron’s age my daughter was having the same meals as us

 

[AC55]

Didn’t she once send someone a message to say she couldn’t wait for the day she could step out of the limelight?

Yeas it was that silly little bastard Mario!

 

[AC55]

It’s mad how many nurses and NHS workers are in here ( I’m a nurse myself) considering we are thought of as a bunch of bitter sour old pastry trolling bastards, there are lots of people who are educated, articulate, fucking hilarious and in the caring profession. Compared to the fuckers who wank over hinch and can’t string a sentence together...don’t work....are cunts.... could go on

I'm nurse too. Tattle and AC55 is my alter ego!

 

[Meeeeeeeeeeeee]

I’ve had one of the worst days of my life, I’ve been crying for hours. I think my social Media needs to go. Its not helping my mental health at all. People have real things going on, having a really hard time and I don’t think I can cope watching this prick living her ridiculous life anymore. Life is so unfair. Fuck yeah I’m jealous, jealous of how easy she has it. I feel done in. This battle is exhausting

I know exactly how you feel, my lovely. Both myself and my husband work for the NHS frontline and have 2 disabled children we live from one pay day to the next. I’ve sat in tears and anxiety through the roof as my house isn’t clean or upto inst standards.....I use to think wow these people are so lucky and so deserving of these things and then I had my eyes opened by the amazing “trolls” and “bitches“ of tattle!!!!! I really hope you’re ok and things do start to get easier, since I’ve unfollowed many I feel more motivated, work that one out?? Sending you lots of love and hugs

also if I did that for dinner in this house I’d get what’s the main bit xxx

 

[Astonishing]

Why is there not one at the bottom of the stairs

Cause ron gets to the top can’t open it and Hen brings him down on his back
The adventures of Ron and Hen part 1

 

[Not fussed]

You know how the jealousy card gets chucked out a lot if we say we don't like Hinch

Well I am jealous.

Where do I get a kid that sleeps as much as tufty bin manzzz?