you just reminded me that on my first driving test instead of grabbing the gear stick i grabbed onto the examiners knee by mistakeI was on my driving test doing a reverse around a corner when I realised my blouse had popped open and my more than ample boobs were on show. I carried on doing the manoeuvre and when I finished I quickly buttoned it up, hoping he hadn't noticed. Got back to the test centre where he congratulated me on my pass. He praised me for carrying on with the manoeuvre even though I had a little mishap with my blouse. My kids are convinced that's why I passed.
A bird shat on my head in the middle of Blackpool. I’d gone with friends for a boozy weekend and we’d not long got there. Felt a splat on my head, instantly knew what it was and shouted “OMG A BIRD HAS JUST SHAT ON MY HEAD HELP” My friends thought it was hilarious, I was horrified! Someone had to run into a nearby chippy to get napkins.
I’m crying at this oneI have stood on the spikes of a rake and the handle has come up and hit me in the face à la sideshow bob. Even worse, it left me so confused i stepped forward, again onto the rake spike and the handle came flying into my face again.
Luckily it was only in front of my family, who were no help at all as they were all crying with laughter. My kind cousin removed said rake from my path so it didn't happen again!
Actually pissing myself, sent this to everyone I know to give them a laughI have stood on the spikes of a rake and the handle has come up and hit me in the face à la sideshow bob. Even worse, it left me so confused i stepped forward, again onto the rake spike and the handle came flying into my face again.
Luckily it was only in front of my family, who were no help at all as they were all crying with laughter. My kind cousin removed said rake from my path so it didn't happen again!
Reminded of another one of mine ... I'd accepted a new job which came with the requirement that I be a registered first aider and fire marshal for the company, so before I could start my job I had to sit courses for these things. I did a St John Ambulance course for the first aid where an instructor would go over the material and then we'd practice with an assigned buddy. We were told that if someone has a seizure, it would be a good idea to cover them with a blanket or coat etc. as it's likely they will have lost bladder and / or bowel control. No one in the class did this and then, when it came time for me and my buddy to demonstrate last, he put me in the recovery position and then boomed in naturally Brian Blessed-like tones "She's sh*t herself, I'll just put my jacket over her." Thank you so very much
I did pass the course - although everyone started laughing and the instructor was all "thank you, that will do!"Was it a pass? I hope your buddy doesn't do that for real, it's supposed to be discreet but I'd have burst out laughing (obviously not in a real life situation, I do have some compassion )
CryingReminded of another one of mine ... I'd accepted a new job which came with the requirement that I be a registered first aider and fire marshal for the company, so before I could start my job I had to sit courses for these things. I did a St John Ambulance course for the first aid where an instructor would go over the material and then we'd practice with an assigned buddy. We were told that if someone has a seizure, it would be a good idea to cover them with a blanket or coat etc. as it's likely they will have lost bladder and / or bowel control. No one in the class did this and then, when it came time for me and my buddy to demonstrate last, he put me in the recovery position and then boomed in naturally Brian Blessed-like tones "She's sh*t herself, I'll just put my jacket over her." Thank you so very much
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