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I work in fast food as customer service-welcoming you in,mopping up spills,trying to keep your kids under control while smiling etcI'm going to share my least embarrassing stories, which still wake me up at night but nothing compared to what I have stored in my brain
1. One time, during orientation week at uni, this girl introduced herself. Her name was Violet (beautiful name) but in the noisy hall I heard it as 'violence.' I chuckled and said: "ok tell me your real name." She repeated her name. I said through chuckles: "NOBODY names their child that! What's your name?"
I don't know when the penny dropped, it was long after she had walked away.
That wasn't my last offence with people's names, unfortunately. I had a similar reaction to a Mexican man named Jaime, I heard it as 'hymen'.
I consciously decided that I would stop reacting to names afterwards. No matter what. I don't care if someone says: "I'm Vagina Moonrocket," I've trained myself to just say: "nice to meet you."
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2. I had detox tea a few hours before the end of my shift. If you've ever had one of those, you'll know exactly how stinky this story is... So I've put a spoiler warning on it. Don't read if you're eating.
At the end of a work shift, I had to stop to use the ladies before going home. I had already taken my coat and handbag out of my locker, so hung my very distinctive coat over the door.
I was alone so felt safe to let it all out, not expecting it to be that bad. I normally hold it in at work so I don't stink up the place, but sometimes when you have to go, you have to go. Sorry the over share, this one was particularly very stinky.
Thought I'd be in and out undetected, as nobody is in the bathrooms during shift change. They are either entering/leaving the building, or in the locker rooms (not attached to the bathrooms). Two supervisors walked in. I knew them by their voices. One said it was just too stinky, she couldn't breathe, and left. The other one, my direct supervisor, used the toilet right next to me (I had, of course, picked the middle stall).
It's one of those toilet cubicle designs with the open bottom, so you can see each others shoes. I knew her by her voice and shoes. She definitely knew it was me by my coat and shoes, no mistake
If I wasn't already embarrassed, I decided the best thing in the moment was to be still and not make a sound, thinking I would wait it out until she left. She was obviously thinking the same thing, because after an awkward long while I noticed I couldn't hear her moving, peeing, or making any sound. I had to give in, finish what I started, and hurry out of there.
Couldn't look at her for a long time afterwards. If I was a millionaire, I never would have shown up to work again after that.
well one night my fella and I had one of those boxed ready meal curries from Tesco-2 rice 2 curries and nan bread for a fiver,for our dinner
all good and tasty but I noticed my farts smelt just like my fav wrap and couldn’t work out why-I just put it down to period farts as I was due around then
anyway we went to bed and managed not to kill my fella with my toxic arse and when I got up I noticed that I would get ripping tummy ache and then the most toxic fart ever,rinse and repeat
I headed off to work as we where short staffed and I knew they had nobody to cover me if I rang in sick,but figured I’d just pop to the lav if I needed to ‘go’
as the day wore on,my tummy was cramping every few minutes and I really needed to,well,let one go
the problem was I work with burgers and these STANK of curry and ‘other substances‘
I kept popping into our staff cupboards (which at the time was away from any customers) to let them go-as Sod’s law would have it,we where really busy so I couldn’t go to the lav without some other poor sod being in there
we had endless complaints that day about the smell even tho I used a full can of air freshener
2 and a half years on my boss still brings up the day ‘there was an awful smell of curry’
sorry boss-it was me not the drains
On the topic of pee pots, this is kind of embarrassing and also disgusting at the same time
I went for a consultant check up at hospital when I was pregnant with my first, did all the usual weight/blood pressure etc etc then the nurse handed me a blue bag with a pot of liquid in it and said “there you go, that’s your one, you’ll need to give it to the consultant”. This being my first child and first consultant appointment, I took it and didn’t question and must have sat waiting for over an hour for my appointment. When I finally went in, I said to the consultant “oh, the nurse said you’ll need this” and she said “what is it?” And I said I don’t know? And she opened it and it was pee. Someone else’s pee. I was mortified id been holding it for an HOUR without questioning and also that I’d just handed it right over to the consultant so blasé What was it actually for?On the topic of pee pots, this is kind of embarrassing and also disgusting at the same time
When I was 18 I had a danish gf, and I went to denmark to meet her family etc. She was invited to go with her band (marching band, like the schools have in the US). Anyway, we were on the coach surrounded by her 18 year blonde friends. The man in charge got up and said something in Danish. With that, the entire coach starts to strip off, including her friends. These 18 year old blonde very fit girls. They were stripping off everything. Everything. I was surrounded by nubile girls with nothing on. The Benny Hill cell in me started shouting 'Look, Look, Look you Bastard, when are you going to have another chance like this???' The Ben(ny) Elton cell in me was shouting 'You are not sexist, respect women'. Trying not to stare, I started reading my book, but my gf asked why I was reading it upside down.
It turned out that man in charge had announced that there wasn't changing facilities at the venue they were going to, so they to change on the bus.
It turned out that man in charge had announced that there wasn't changing facilities at the venue they were going to, so they to change on the bus.
I guess mine can be blamed on Icloud photos wanting to link up all the Icloud accounts in the household to have a massive embarrassing picture share party... 
I was living with my mum, her partner & my cousin at the time and i feel like you folks can guess what everyone saw
My worst embarassing moment literally reads like one of those “ set the scene “ god awful gross pornos, am eternally embarrassed ... forever
I was living with my mum, her partner & my cousin at the time and i feel like you folks can guess what everyone saw
My worst embarassing moment literally reads like one of those “ set the scene “ god awful gross pornos, am eternally embarrassed ... forever
I had my first smear test at my local GP's surgery about 2 years ago.
So there I am nervous as hell, lying on my back, partially hidden by a couple of screens, legs spread and in stirrups. The nurse then shoves a speculum up my muff, gets a phone call and has to leave the room for a minute!
Fortunately the screens were just enough to keep me hidden from view when she opened the door into the waiting room. But all the same, lying on my back with a metal speculum for company and my bits in full view was not my idea of fun at all
(No problem with the test results though, which was a relief)
So there I am nervous as hell, lying on my back, partially hidden by a couple of screens, legs spread and in stirrups. The nurse then shoves a speculum up my muff, gets a phone call and has to leave the room for a minute!
Fortunately the screens were just enough to keep me hidden from view when she opened the door into the waiting room. But all the same, lying on my back with a metal speculum for company and my bits in full view was not my idea of fun at all
(No problem with the test results though, which was a relief)
My dad rides a motorbike and my mother always goes on the back
well one day,she got off to pop into a shop and while she was gone my dad moved the bike about 50 yards down as it was better for him
she came out,jumped on the back of what she thought was his bike,tucked her scarf under her and shouted (as dads a bit deaf) ‘come on then you miserable bastard,we’ve gotta meet our lass-we’re gonna be late’
the bloke who’s bike it was just turned to look at her
she shot off the bike and ran to murder my dad when she finally saw him
my brother is a bigger fella (think at least 25 stone)
well one day I saw him in Tesco (the back of him anyway)
I walked up behind him,jabbed him in the ribs and shouted ‘hey up you fat twit,long time no see!’
it wasn’t him,and the worst bit was,I had to walk past him again to go to the checkout…
I still want to die thinking about it
well one day,she got off to pop into a shop and while she was gone my dad moved the bike about 50 yards down as it was better for him
she came out,jumped on the back of what she thought was his bike,tucked her scarf under her and shouted (as dads a bit deaf) ‘come on then you miserable bastard,we’ve gotta meet our lass-we’re gonna be late’
the bloke who’s bike it was just turned to look at her
she shot off the bike and ran to murder my dad when she finally saw him
my brother is a bigger fella (think at least 25 stone)
well one day I saw him in Tesco (the back of him anyway)
I walked up behind him,jabbed him in the ribs and shouted ‘hey up you fat twit,long time no see!’
it wasn’t him,and the worst bit was,I had to walk past him again to go to the checkout…
I still want to die thinking about it
Was on the bus home from college years ago and people kept looking at me, I thought I must have looked good that day. I walk in the house and my mum goes ‘hiya Peggy’ so I’m like ‘what?’... came home with a peg attached to my hood what someone must have put on me as a prank.
My middle shirt button popped off (literally - it flew across the table) at a job interview . I've never been more mortified in my life.
. I've never been more mortified in my life.I did manage to start off a full base alert when I went to a major NATO station for a job interview. However, I am actually quite proud of that.
And yes, I did get offered the job!!!
And yes, I did get offered the job!!!
Went to a different branch of my bank as was in another town. On the way out pressed the switch to open the automatic doors, but it wasn’t for the door- it was a light switch! All the lights in the place went off, everyone stopped and the security guard made his way over as I scarpered out the door!
Did you get the job?My middle shirt button popped off (literally - it flew across the table) at a job interview
I used to be a dancer at a club in Liverpool and one night, myself and my mate just finished our slot and decided to go downstairs to have a drink, to set the scene in your mind, we had matching skimpy sequin outfits on and stilettos and thought away too much of ourselves back then ha!
We noticed that there was high activity over in the VIP section and then saw who it was, only Jamie Rednapp and Ryan Giggs! Back in the 90s both were FIT! We straightened ourselves and decided we were going over there, I went first and approached the metal winding stair case, my heel got stuck and as I screamed, all of the footie players looked up at the exact moment my body went arse over tit and fell down 12 steps!! My mate, who said she could see it happen in slow motion went to catch me as I was falling and her body threw itself down the stairs after me
The lads were all laughing and I got myself a broken ankle for my antics. My mate was fine as I cushioned her fall. I’ve never lived it down, still embarrassing to this day!!
We noticed that there was high activity over in the VIP section and then saw who it was, only Jamie Rednapp and Ryan Giggs! Back in the 90s both were FIT! We straightened ourselves and decided we were going over there, I went first and approached the metal winding stair case, my heel got stuck and as I screamed, all of the footie players looked up at the exact moment my body went arse over tit and fell down 12 steps!! My mate, who said she could see it happen in slow motion went to catch me as I was falling and her body threw itself down the stairs after me
The lads were all laughing and I got myself a broken ankle for my antics. My mate was fine as I cushioned her fall. I’ve never lived it down, still embarrassing to this day!!
No, and when I asked the recruitment agency for feedback they ghosted me!
Oh boy....when I was in my final year of uni, I had a very handsome dissertation supervisor. I remember once having a meeting with him -I was chewing gum and then realised, with great shame, that I had a string of gum hanging out my mouth and sticking to my hair. We were sitting right oppsite each other at a table so there's no way he didn't notice...ugh still cringe when I think about it. He still gave me a hug at my graduation tho lmao
You are not alone, them Tesco curries hang around in my system for ages
I won't have one unless I am off work the day after.
When I was little we used to have our milk delivered by a milk man. My mum never had enough money to pay him when he knocked though and always had to ask him if she could either leave it out for him the next day or pay him the week later... He was always kind but she said she could tell it was an inconvenience for him. Anyway early one morning she woke to him knocking and was really excited she had the money in her purse to actually pay him on time!... She grabbed her dressing gown ran down the stairs, flung open the front door and shouted "it's your lucky day"!!!.... Unfortunately her dressing gown belt had come undone and she was shouting this completely exposing her naked self 
.... She said his face was a mix of pure terror and embarrassment, and of course she was mortified that he might have thought she was offering herself in payment for the milk 
She left the money on the step from that day onwards...
.... She said his face was a mix of pure terror and embarrassment, and of course she was mortified that he might have thought she was offering herself in payment for the milk She left the money on the step from that day onwards...
Once when my husband was away I sent a very detailed message to a friend of how much I was missing him.. you know best friend talk. Well I thought it was my best friend. I accidentally sent it to my parents in law! I was mortified! There were things in that message not for parents eyes