I am giving it a go right now. Will give a blow by blow.
It's very long and rambley. Feel free to skip this post. 56:21 minutes of Melanie video and this is what I have to show for it. FML.
TLDR: it's a dumpster fire of a video. Horrible jumps and editing. Nothing chilled about it or entertaining. Let alone informative. It's a haphazard collection of badly edited rambling.
Let's go:
"I had a covid wedding and a pandemic baby. My first baby"
The intro already pissed me off.
1:30 minute in and we get the second ad. Make that coin, I guess.
It's so scattered in the beginning. I hope it gets better. In terms of everything, the thought processes and editing etc.
Also, she doesn't put on a shirt or sweater to go for a walk in january. Only the cropped fabletics down jacket over a sports bra with leggings.
Every little thought is followed by a meme of some kind.
She goes through all she accomplished (honours degree, "bagging" an amazing life partner, losing 60 pounds, managing mental health issues and getting published) and plugs her new book.
Oh nice, she is talking about how horrible and common hair loss is in women when they have kids. How many women go bald, have to wear wigs and how awful it is and using pictures of post pregnancy hair loss in other women. Because that is great for women's mental health. Good job, Melanie. Not fear inducing at all. Especially since stress is also a reason people lose hair. Bang up job. Had to stop watching for a minute.
Ok, back to it.
She talks about goals for the year, month and day.
Her goals for the year are:
- get stronger and more fit
- finish the book
- be consistent with skincare
- haircare routine to help with hairloss
- have more sober/Covid friendly meeting with friends
- post YouTube video every 10 days
- being mindful in motherhood
- support Irish businesses
And then she does a list for the month.
Plan content
Write 3000 words a week
Go for daily walks
Strength train 3 times a week
Steam face weekly
Do skincare daily
Listen to audiobooks
1 hour quality time with Thomas each day (maybe she should just delete Twitter and she would have multiple hours with him if that's what she wants)
Time management
1 new recipe a week
Then it's on to daily goals.
Her goal of having a cold shower daily treats us to views of her topless in the shower, hands on tits and all.
She will have a check box for stuff like drinking water, taking a walk and pooping.
She's taking the piss. She can't be serious.
Side note, she doesn't refer back to these goals in most cases.
Out for a walk with her dad saying she's so productive since becoming a mom. She mentions that he is in her social bubble because he lives alone.
And then shower footage again. Lovely. Less tits this time.
In her snippets of what I assume is dinner she leaves us with another jewel.
"Another day in lockdown, another day of
bleeping soup. Remember eating out?"
Don't blame Covid for your boring food. Cook nicer food, or, if that's impossible, order food in. That would accomplish the goal of supporting local businesses. And even without Covid, according to her, she wouldn't be able to go out for food because she is soooooooooooooo busy.
She talks about the wedding and how much money they lost. 8k up in the air and 5k that is lost forever. Cry me a river. So they will have a wedding to not lose it all. Sounds so special and nice. Imagine being invited to that after she made it clear that she doesn't even want to be there herself and only does it to not lose money.
March 2022 is the date. And that leads into how great her skin was before Covid and how she needs to get it back to that by her new wedding date. And then going on about her skin care. I dozed off.
We get treated to some prime workout footage. Some skin care stuff and how she wants to prevent wrinkles.
And then some more hair loss talk and how horrifying it is and how she is going to be a "baldy Sue". How she can feel the hair falling down her back all the time and then she goes into all the stuff she bought for her hair. Thomas's hair transplant video is coming btw, just waiting for regrowth to come in. Thomas talks about the process and Melanie just doesn't even listen, react or anything. She pretends he isn't there and plays with the baby interrupting everything he says.
Then they are off for a walk on the beach where she says she used to imagine her kids playing on the beach before she knew if she was even able to have them and now she's here. Manifestation stuff. And now she needs to get on the manifestation for getting their house because she's so good at it
She then talks about her grandma when she walks by her old house and how it's difficult to have lost her. She then says she's so sorry for people who lost their grandparents last year and how she isn't sure why she even thought about that just then and that it hit her.
Uhm what? This
tit makes me so angry. Is that really the first time she stopped to reflect on the fact how many people lost loved ones last year and weren't able to say goodbye or hold their hand?
REALLY? The woman who constantly
witches about lockdown and Covid restriction had it now occurr to her that Covid deaths were lonely ones? That it's tough to lose someone always but even more difficult when you don't get to say goodbye? It boils my blood.
I need to take a break.
Back at it.
Some footage at home in bathrobes with Thomas. Some stress and mediation talk, buttering some burnt toast. And how she helps her son to sit up and how she pulls him up to do that.
Then some talk on how she's so productive now.
Then some footage of them getting the photos for Thomas's fundraiser.
She says her taking 30 seconds cold showers is her contribution. Of course it is, Melanie. You are a hero. It's all about you.
Her son is an influencer because she gets sent skin care for him. And then some footage of her in the bath with him.
Snowy walk with her dad, a call with her friends and her making soup.
Yawn.
Talk about writing and how she is always improving and needs to take the project more seriously and how she needs to do it every day.
Vaccination day for the baby but at least she does do it (a plus in my opinion). She says she's nervous about it and also because some people there have had Covid. (Really? At a clinic? Shocker).
Then they have take away and watch a movie sitting on the floor. Some more footage about the fundraiser.
I must say although I'm not a huge Thomas fan, it's cute to see how motivated and happy he seems about it. He's so cheery when he talks about it.
That's it. Over.
She asks for feedback.
Mine is:
More structure and less ramble. Don't present goals at the beginning if then there's not a round up about how she did. Also, less tit footage in the shower, please.
That's me done.
shut up for a minute and let him speak
but tagging M&S must be looking for freebies for the monster pandemic baby 4 months in 12 months clothes 
