Recap:
> Marcus is trying to lose weight. This comes after Sid bet him £200 he would lose weight.
> Hysterically, this comes a day after he started creating some air fried concoctions - a deep fried mars bar which was rolled in stodgy pastry, chicken rolled in crushed up Doritos, and cheese bites covered in Cheeto crumbs.
> Inspired, Marcus created a weight loss group yesterday afternoon and, citing security aka not wanting tattlers in the group he decided to charge a fee before allowing membership to the group, despite this being against Facebook’s rules. He charged £5, and then after a healthy dose of blocking and deleting anyone who pointed out his grifting behaviour, lowered the price to £3.50. As of this morning the group had ten members, one of which is himself. The page is still active but his links to it have been deleted.
> Aside from his grifting, Marcus decided to become a movie reviewer, claiming to watch and review ten horror movies a day. This got off to a fantastic start (she says, sarcastically) as Marcus was caught having copy and pasted a review of the film and lying that this review was his own opinion.
> A day into his new diet, marcus is hoovering down that well known healthy meal of pasta, beans and cheese. In doing so he has also reinvented metrics, a sprinkle of cheese is on his pasta he says, when really it is the entire block.