Can you imagine:
Lady L: "Reyaaaan! For Christsake! Can you look after your son for the next two and a half hours as I need to put my make-up on... It's just been non stop all morning. I've been up since 5.00am and have already done four hours in the bath. Don't forget to feed the baby, but only with the stuff marked [AD]. I have an impossibly busy day today. What?! The baby's pooped and needs changing? Well don't even think of doing it until 4'oclock when the cameraman arrives otherwise people will think we're bad parents. I want to do a big reveal! Something really big, and exciting and special for everybody.... Anyway as I was saying, I'm just rushed off my feet today and have an impossibly busy day... as I'm waiting for a call from mum... Well she did say she might call... although she didn't say what time... and she also did say that it might be tomorrow... Oh, and I've got to sort out all my old dresses for Sam to wear... <begins slathering on dark brown foundation> Right! After I've got my make-up on, I'm going off to cry in the park for a few hours where strangers will be sure to see me. Oh, and I'm not speaking to the Essex girl. I asked her to give me the filters... you know the one that will make me look 8ft tall with my tits under my chin... and she gave me a box marked 'Melitta.' Like she didn't know what I was talking about...
Listen, can you just put the baby down, hold the phone straight as you're all over the place... and film me while I'm talking to you! Honestly! You just have no idea how hard it is to Live Like Leuw... "<dogs barking madly in the background>
I'd better go now. We're all laughing like crazy in the office and my boss has just walked in.
