It's soooo awkward. I just want to move on and get my space but I can't. Viewings are tricky as if the property is tenanted, you can't view it due to Covid. I'm just chugging on and trying not to get too overwhelmed
Lockdown has changed my relationship
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i can only imagine, for me it's awkward when we get into a fight let alone if we broke up.
just tell yourself you were brave enough to make a right decision for yourself and soon you'll be looking back on it feeling proud
Ah I feel for youi can only imagine, for me it's awkward when we get into a fight let alone if we broke up.
just tell yourself you were brave enough to make a right decision for yourself and soon you'll be looking back on it feeling proud
I hope you manage to work it all out xAnd thank you for your kind words
I know this thread is dead now but... I am officially living in my own place after my breakup! 
How are you finding it, are you ok?I know this thread is dead now but... I am officially living in my own place after my breakup!
I love it. I have so much space, I can do things on my own schedule, don't have to answer to anyone... Not trying to slag off my ex here, and obviously had good times with him when we were together, but being here has reinforced the fact I made the right decision to leave which is the biggest relief of all tbh
Thatās amazing Iām so happy for you.
Thank you!
Thatās so nice to hear. Sounds like you made the right decision.
Iām hoping that the easing of lockdown will help our relationship. Weāve been married for 23 years this year. Together for 26. But lockdown has changed the way I feel about him.
move continued to work two jobs throughout and he was furloughed at one point and then back-part time and still part time now. He moaned about being furloughed and I suggested he got an additional job and said think of the money. The supermarket I work at had plenty of jobs going but he didnāt even apply. Then my other job was looking for people to come in and do a bit of diy and again he refused.
he just has no get up and go. He expects things tk be handed to him. We had discussions about what he would do if his job never got back to full time as once furlough payments end heāll be on part time wages for however many hours he works.
I work full time Monday to Friday. Then second job every Saturday and every other Sunday. I suggested today that I ask to work two evenings a week instead so 6-10pm which would mean weekend free and I would not have to start work at 2am and he said heās used to me working weekends now so why change it? Why change it?? Iām exhausted and feel it ruins our weekends. My children are older now, the youngest just turned 15 and she makes comments about food youāre always working never at home. Well yes thatās right as someone needs to be.
Itās just not how I thought a marriage would be never thought Iād be the one making sure that we had everything we need and making sure we have money for fun stuff. I begrudge buying him things as well as I feel he doesnāt deserve them. I get comments about make up and clothes but Iām working! He has a uniform.
Sorry to derail from your happy news. I guess itās been weighing on my mind.
Iām hoping that the easing of lockdown will help our relationship. Weāve been married for 23 years this year. Together for 26. But lockdown has changed the way I feel about him.
move continued to work two jobs throughout and he was furloughed at one point and then back-part time and still part time now. He moaned about being furloughed and I suggested he got an additional job and said think of the money. The supermarket I work at had plenty of jobs going but he didnāt even apply. Then my other job was looking for people to come in and do a bit of diy and again he refused.
he just has no get up and go. He expects things tk be handed to him. We had discussions about what he would do if his job never got back to full time as once furlough payments end heāll be on part time wages for however many hours he works.
I work full time Monday to Friday. Then second job every Saturday and every other Sunday. I suggested today that I ask to work two evenings a week instead so 6-10pm which would mean weekend free and I would not have to start work at 2am and he said heās used to me working weekends now so why change it? Why change it?? Iām exhausted and feel it ruins our weekends. My children are older now, the youngest just turned 15 and she makes comments about food youāre always working never at home. Well yes thatās right as someone needs to be.
Itās just not how I thought a marriage would be never thought Iād be the one making sure that we had everything we need and making sure we have money for fun stuff. I begrudge buying him things as well as I feel he doesnāt deserve them. I get comments about make up and clothes but Iām working! He has a uniform.
Sorry to derail from your happy news. I guess itās been weighing on my mind.
This is what this thread is about so please don't apologise. We all have our own lives and please don't feel you derailed the thread or anything.
I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. I'm only 23 myself so can't comment on a relationship that long but I hope someone else can weigh in. It sounds like a nightmare though so here are some virtual hugs
I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. I'm only 23 myself so can't comment on a relationship that long but I hope someone else can weigh in. It sounds like a nightmare though so here are some virtual hugs
Thank you @alwayslurkin that makes me feel old, my son is 23. Turns 24 in July 
my husband is almost ten years older than me and whilst I think that probably seemed exciting when I was younger now heās 10 years older than me when Iām 44 it doesnāt seem so exciting.
my husband is almost ten years older than me and whilst I think that probably seemed exciting when I was younger now heās 10 years older than me when Iām 44 it doesnāt seem so exciting.
Please donāt apologise @Bumblebee. I can actually relate to you a bit. My husband got furloughed too while I could/can work from home so I got āitās ok for you youāre still workingā thrown at me a lot, and a tiny thing would end up in an argument.
In the end I went and stayed at my grandads for a couple of weeks, it wasnāt a magic cure but it helped massively.
Could you speak to him at all? I know men are masters at shutting things down and explain how youāre feeling?
Iām sorry Iām not much use on the advice front Iām sending you all the love in the world. This thread and people commenting helped me because it was nice to hear I wasnāt alone and offered advice, I hope it can do the same for you.
In the end I went and stayed at my grandads for a couple of weeks, it wasnāt a magic cure but it helped massively.
Could you speak to him at all? I know men are masters at shutting things down and explain how youāre feeling?
Iām sorry Iām not much use on the advice front Iām sending you all the love in the world. This thread and people commenting helped me because it was nice to hear I wasnāt alone and offered advice, I hope it can do the same for you.
I donāt know what to do about my partner. Over lockdown he has become very isolated from everyone and now itās almost like he canāt bring himself to see anybody. He doesnāt even like leaving the house to go for a walk. He doesnāt keep in touch with any friends and I canāt persuade him to join me in anything that involves leaving the house or other people. Itās like some sort of weird lockdown induced agoraphobia! If I mention it I get told to drop it and to stop nagging him I just wish for once he would want to plan something with me, if I suggest things I get shot down.
I just wish for once he would want to plan something with me, if I suggest things I get shot down.Would he go with you somewhere with you in a car like a drive thru coffee or some food? Set off with small things.I donāt know what to do about my partner. Over lockdown he has become very isolated from everyone and now itās almost like he canāt bring himself to see anybody. He doesnāt even like leaving the house to go for a walk. He doesnāt keep in touch with any friends and I canāt persuade him to join me in anything that involves leaving the house or other people. Itās like some sort of weird lockdown induced agoraphobia! If I mention it I get told to drop it and to stop nagging him
I have actually heard a few people say of family members that have developed a bit of a phobia about leaving the house.
Maybe reduce your hours anyway, if it's feasible Restrictions are easing , you can get some social time .
This sentence aged well, weāre getting divorced
. I feel strange I thought Iād be and probably should be heartbroken and crying into my cornflakes but I actually feel happy, it feels like something has lifted. I think as much as the time apart for us papered over the cracks, it also made me realise that I could be happy on my own and that weāre different people to the ones we were six years ago.
sending you virtual love. I'm glad you've worked out what is right for the both of you even if it is a divorceThis sentence aged well, weāre getting divorced
I think as much as the time apart for us papered over the cracks, it also made me realise that I could be happy on my own and that weāre different people to the ones we were six years ago.
Thank yousending you virtual love. I'm glad you've worked out what is right for the both of you even if it is a divorce
Iām so sorry to read how unhappy some of you have been and how difficult things have been for you. To those of you that have made big decisions to end relationships/fly solo Iām really happy for you that youāve managed to do whatās best for you!
A lot of your posts could have been written by me! Pre-pandemic my boyfriend had a really healthy social life (heavily centred around him working in the city). I work away so we only used to see each other once a week max (we didnāt live together before).
Now that we do live together and social lives have been non existent and Iāve been away less and less our whole relationship has changed.
Iām someone that loves my own company and really needs my own space whereas heās the complete opposite.
I know I love him and our life together as when Iām away Iām always excited to come home to him but at the same time I find myself really resenting the fact heās always around.
Iāve also had zero interest in sex really whereas he seems to want it all. The. Time. Which is something else Iām worrying about. The times where I do feel like having sex by the time it gets to it heās usually done something to annoy me or Iāve gone off it again and Iām starting to worry that Iām just not attracted to him anymore.
We donāt have kids or anything (just a dog) so Iām not scared of starting again Iām just worried Iād be making the wrong decision based on things happening in a pandemic and not āreal lifeā if you know what I mean.
Weāve recently been seriously talking about getting engaged/married and whilst I want to be with him forever Iām so worried about how Iām feeling at the moment that Iām not sure itās the right thing.
Iāve spoken to him about the sex thing and heās been very understanding and Iāve also mentioned the fact I like being on my own every now and again and his suggestion is that I go and stay with my parents for a few days. But at the same time I donāt want to break the rules and I also think thatās only a short term solution.
I just want our old lives back.
Sorry I feel like I just needed to offload to people that have been having similar feelings.
A lot of your posts could have been written by me! Pre-pandemic my boyfriend had a really healthy social life (heavily centred around him working in the city). I work away so we only used to see each other once a week max (we didnāt live together before).
Now that we do live together and social lives have been non existent and Iāve been away less and less our whole relationship has changed.
Iām someone that loves my own company and really needs my own space whereas heās the complete opposite.
I know I love him and our life together as when Iām away Iām always excited to come home to him but at the same time I find myself really resenting the fact heās always around.
Iāve also had zero interest in sex really whereas he seems to want it all. The. Time. Which is something else Iām worrying about. The times where I do feel like having sex by the time it gets to it heās usually done something to annoy me or Iāve gone off it again and Iām starting to worry that Iām just not attracted to him anymore.
We donāt have kids or anything (just a dog) so Iām not scared of starting again Iām just worried Iād be making the wrong decision based on things happening in a pandemic and not āreal lifeā if you know what I mean.
Weāve recently been seriously talking about getting engaged/married and whilst I want to be with him forever Iām so worried about how Iām feeling at the moment that Iām not sure itās the right thing.
Iāve spoken to him about the sex thing and heās been very understanding and Iāve also mentioned the fact I like being on my own every now and again and his suggestion is that I go and stay with my parents for a few days. But at the same time I donāt want to break the rules and I also think thatās only a short term solution.
I just want our old lives back.
Sorry I feel like I just needed to offload to people that have been having similar feelings.
Iām so sorry youāre going through this, Iām probably not the person to be giving advice given my current situation, however it does sound like time apart might be helpful for you. At the very least youāll get some time to yourself.