Dead!
Didn't she do a hairbeeeerrrst flog a while back with a brush full of hair? She's such a Billy bullshitter
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Dead!
Didn't she do a hairbeeeerrrst flog a while back with a brush full of hair? She's such a Billy bullshitterUrgh I know I shouldn’t be annoyed but is she really claiming she hasn’t lost a single hair because of hairberrrrrst! Who buys into this shite.
Also Kate, everyone can see you had eyebrows before you cretin.
Fucking brilliantAnd the shitshow continues..
Woah, and we’re already back from Ibiza after 6 days for Kate, and 3 for the car seat. Most favourite place in the world, Kate? Can’t wait to show your daughter the most amazing island on the planet and all the secret views only you know about? Bet she loved the view of the tablecloths and the bottom of the wine glasses from over the edge of her car seat, didn’t she?
As foreseen millennia ago by Nostradamus, Paul the Octopus, and the weird Russian lady with one eye, after almost a week away of filtering and editing her own pictures to look like Pamela Anderson in 1992 whilst simultaneously looking like the secret love child of Uncle Fester and the entrance to Narnia in videos that she had no control over, we had our 174th troll rant of the year after she had ‘loads of abuse’ or as it’s really known, she read here and realised she’d made a prick of herself and the whole of Instagram had seen what she really looked like with a 1960s lampshade protruding from her minge and arse. The rant was as predictable as England losing on penalties with lots of pictures of her belly and her thumbs, a mention of how she’s ‘not in the same place as she was a year ago’, the ‘I don’t even edit my pictures’ chorus, and a quick rendition of the ‘they’re just jealous’ anthem to finish it off.
In sports news, she’s gone ‘straight back’ to running. Not sure how you go ‘straight back’ to something you haven’t done for three full moons but there we go. Despite being able to run ‘10k in 50 minutes’ a few months ago, she was blowing out of her arse after a jog to the top of her road and back. Her chins have also come ‘straight back’ too. Strange how they were absent in her pictures in Ibiza. Maybe they didn’t think 6 days and a visit to Ocean Beach and the Palma Pervert was worth the quarantine period?
Due to their superstar status and Delo’s unfortunate case of contagious rickets, the car seat, Indiana Gnomes, and the child in the massive socks were given an ‘isle’ to themselves on their exclusive Jet2 economy flight. This definitely had nothing to do with the fact the flight was only half full, and we’re in the middle of a global pandemic and most safety-conscious people are still waiting to fly, it was solely because Jet2 staff instantly recognised Triple Threat and the car seat at the airport. Must have been the underwear model body and the rattle of the Cheetham Cartier bangle that made him stand out..
She opened a Q&A about her jetsetting lifestyle in order to answer the ‘millions of DMs’’ that her 16 year old childless followers had sent about taking a car seat abroad. After answering just one question about feeding a kid in a foreign country (who knew they sold baby food abroad? It’s almost as though they’re civilised nations who have their own children to feed too), she quickly descended into a retell of her favourite fairy tale, Katie Hayes and the Dreamy C-Section, a story full of wonder and amazement and popping waters in shops and/or on landings and no pain relief.
Sunday night and she realised she’d almost missed out on a bandwagon to jump on. Despite not showing any interest in the football ever, she suddenly started sharing pictures of Gareth Southgate and England flags. Couple more bandwagons, Kate, and you’ll have a fleet to rival Eddie Stobart.
In a shock twist, we had our 175th troll rant of the year just a few days later. Proppet not getting the engagement she once did, eh Kate? The true horror of being called out on lying about her dreamy bespoke life and editing her photos was finally revealed when we learned that she has it just as hard as a 19 year old footballer who has been subject to horrific racial abuse. Nevermind people wanting you dead and threatening your family because you missed a penalty, choosing to come on and read a website where you are exposed as a T-Rex footed, beggy, grabby, baby filtering, photoshopping, covid-denying, full stop hating, doesn’t even know her own initials halfwit is definitely, definitely in the same league. God bless you, and all who sail in you, Miss Makeup..
I will leave the final word to Gina Linetti..
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As always, Read the Wiki..
And the IrishAnd the Scottish!
I'm IrishMy mum and dad are the same and they were treated appallingly when they came over here in the 60s. You couldn’t even mention the Scum newspaper in our house. And rightly so.
I’m pretty sure Kate has posted imagines from that paper before. And funnily enough I wasn’t surprised, she’s ignorant and uneducated.
@Abongo I'm sure will do the honoursIf Bong reads the recap in a big brother voice my entire body will depart the earth
Ugh I’m on one this morning, how can she not know that hair is supposed to fall out. What she did doing is false advertising. I think I’m gonna report her.Urgh I know I shouldn’t be annoyed but is she really claiming she hasn’t lost a single hair because of hairberrrrrst! Who buys into this shite.
Also Kate, everyone can see you had eyebrows before you cretin.
Who dis???Happy Wednesday Trolls x
What is that headHappy Wednesday Trolls x
Who is this?Happy Wednesday Trolls x
She looks like a BRATZ dollHappy Wednesday Trolls x
Barbie’s looking roughHappy Wednesday Trolls x
Hahahaha oh my god that’s what I was thinking. Who the fuck even sits about the house with a blazer on?Help me understand why you would wear a blazer to your tint your eyebrows at home?
Cause everyone would see your 3 stone ham arms and you’ve been pretending to be thin for the last 5 yearsHelp me understand why you would wear a blazer to your tint your eyebrows at home?
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