Jessontheplussize #35 Jess Your pizzas on fire and contents still dire!

[Skinny]

Wey no, have your Sunday dinner and follow it up with some carrot cake, cheesecake, shortbread then polish off with a crispie cake.

Followed by the breaking of the sofa. Appy Ouse warmin

 

[Jem1975]

 

[emisixo]

The fact she uses an outlook calendar for a Sunday roast like she’s at work… I can’t

 

[Skinny]

Lights are on but nobody is at home

 

[Diddikins]

Sorry if we’ve already discussed this
But do we know if the Terrible Twins ever treated Mum and partner to a nice meal out or something as a thanks for having them stay while they were between houses?

No they thanked them by turning up on their holiday

 

[Tiny-T]

What the pillow sees when the millichamp siblings are doing doggy

I’m fully aware I’m going to sound like a total bastard but when I opened the story and seen her like that it was the absolute double of Brendan Fraser in the whale.

 

[Tiny-T]

Welcome to the fucken club mate!

I’m actually repulsed by her at the minute and this is coming from a fat lass. The last few weeks watching her has given me such a kick up the arse. There were odd things she would do where I would see similarities to things I do and I was disgusted. I guess I have to thank her because I’m a couple of stone lighter now

 

[justlurking2345]

The carrots and onion in the baking tray is giving “Denise trying to do Christmas dinner” on The Royal Family

 

[Loubell83]

That pink dress is a fucking monstrosity

The whole collection is dire but the pink dress…jesus christ

 

[Skinny]

Mirrow Mirrow on the wall
Who is the laziest of them all?

PLEASE EVERYONE THIS HAS TO BE THE NEW THREAD TITLE

 

[Skinny]

Elloo evreewun, appy wedenzdee *deep breath*. sorri av not been on todee. Av been busy puttin up were new flatpack sofar like *deep breath* Av dohnayted all tha peetzaboxes to me grammar coz ah don’t think ah will use them like. Todee av bin bizzy kewkin mikeesh for were famaly Ouse warmin on sundee. We arr gonna have breakfast at lunchtime and breakfast at dinner time. Av been on were treadmill for 4 owarz todee and me face is soooo red pet. Anyway mi collekshun is now 90% off so get on were app now coz like we are nearly out of stock xxxx

 

[LadyLockdown]

What’s the difference between Jess and Toby Carvery?

Toby Carvery runs out of food.

 

[Lurkeryaar]

She looks like she's wearing someone else's skin as a mask.

 

[Userom]

Who the fuck is this?? They’ve photoshopped half her body off !!

 

[mee43]

Todays the day
I’ve come down with the lurgy today so I’ll be looking for updates on the North East’s very own version of the Met Gala to cheer me up!

 

[Diddikins]

Has she shit the bed? She hasn’t been up this early for ages.

What a relief that she made an iced coffee though. I almost forgot how to make one. How much syrup did she pour in though? Is that a normal amount?

 

[Crazycatlady91]

Can I also say I have Gousto weekly. I’m a bigger girl size 20 who loves a big portion however I’ve actually lost weight by having Gousto because of their portions and I have never felt to add extra meat or rice/pasta. They are designed for portions that you “should”be eating. The extras jess adds is totally unnecessary. That’s the idea of Gousto and the fact of having everything you need fro recipes ordered together. Why does she bother with it if they are never big enough sorry it’s been bugging me for ages everytime she posts about the sizes

 

[Diddikins]

Her lips make me feel sick. They look like she’s been slurping grease

She’s probably been bobbing for leftover roasties.

 

[Chip1984]

Erm, I fasten my bra at the back. I always thought that's how you were meant to fasten it??

 

[BronskiBeat]

Im just catching up on last nights stories, are they actually hiding and jumping out on the dog they have already said is not settled in the house and has full on anxiety?!