Jessontheplussize #26 Doesn't know if its lunch or dinner, but she still believes she's 3 sizes thinner

[Elmoo]

The morning dances are normally at noon. When she gets up. The rest of us have been up for HOURS

 

[Romy]

I’m sorry… what size does she claim to be?! To me this is easily a size 28/30 body.

She is a 24 from the ankles to the knees.

 

[Furnessian]

Fuck off with your "Happy Friday", Jess. You don't work, every day is a Friday for you. As for being "busy", you can fuck off with that as well.

Can you tell I'm knackered? Ha ha

 

[Em_]

She really is a caricature of an English person abroad. Honestly, all that lovely portguese food she could eat and she gets pie and chips and her mate getting fish and chips.

 

[Daisydunn15]

Sorry.. is she off her fucking face? She thinks that black jumpsuit is a perfect fit? is she really forgetting that we've got eyes? Maybe she thinks if she just says it with enough confidence it'll be true? She needed at least a size 28 in that!

 

[GiftedNotFree]

If someone made me sleep on their farty foisty couch when they had a spare room / bed I’d never speak to them again either

 

[DizDog32]

Appie Mundeeee everyone

 

[Annie65]

I couldn’t stand not wearing a bra and my tits flapping everywhere while doing some physical work

 

[Furnessian]

She removed the grid post of the Jon's unreal gammon dress in a sulk when the comments were overwhelming negative

 

[littlemisschattergiggles]

Didn't even realise they served pie in Portugal

We don't! Don't know where she is but must be in the Albufeira or Portimão area. Plenty of cafés serving up British food for the British who want to eat what they eat at home, usually beige and fried.

 

[Annie65]

The same fucking flower pattern making a comeback in 4 different styles. No thanks nana

 

[Diddikins]

I know both Jess and Ash get sent things from them a lot, but it appears that Ash is bringing out a collection with them, all modelled by her etc.

Wow! I’m shocked. You’re right, Jess might get a little jealous of that.

Words fail me on the dancing this morning. That green furry lounge suit makes her look like a massive version of Orville the duck.

 

[Mfranks]

It really is so sad to watch someone struggle to get dressed, and it be content.

When she does these try ons, I cringe so badly. Why hasn't she got that point Where's she's thought, it's a struggle to get tights & shoes on - I need to do something about it. It's actually terrifying - she's around my age, and I get scared at my weight about things going wrong suddenly, never mind if I was 4 or 5 dress sizes bigger.

She has made me so conscious to never get her size though, so she's influenced that at least.

 

[Doingitforthegramhuntake2]

Genuinely don’t understand why people do this! Why would you ‘buy a badge’ basically lining instagrams pocket and giving a share to an influencer? People sure are weird!

 

[emisixo]

Another slogan suggestion: "Wash your fucking face"

A round sunshine smiley emoji waving and the words “APPPEEEY CHEWSDAY” underneath

 

[nothanksbabes]

I can't believe she pays someone to dye her hair that nondescript shade of brown. And there's deffo some grey left at the centre front of her hair. I'd be furious.

Also that jumper is a fucking atrocity.

 

[overgrammers]

Lol at her sharing that 40% off code for ITS. Adam put it on his story saying it was just for his followers and not to share it, she’s shit at her job

Yeah cos if you don’t want something shared you lash it straight up on social media, that’s actually a really good way to ensure it does get shared.

 

[LostScot82]

If she had any sense, which she doesn't, she would have planned this year out and all her trips. Planned the countries, the excursions, the lazy days, the restaurants and she would have tagged the hell out of them - including the local tourist boards. They would have seen a half decent following, a good bit of travel, a variety of content- travel, fashion, make up, general chat ... and she could have quite easily ended up blagging herself some free holidays

But no. She did the Jess version.

I also think that she may as well have gone to Blackpool, because she seems to have sought out the most British part of Portugal she can find.

But they wouldn't have been able to absolutely wreck their already damaged leather skin with yet more sun in Blackpool

 

[BunnyBoo0102]

Are they even still looking? Something seems a bit off about it all - surely they can’t be planning to live with her Mum long term?!

The stupid mare can’t get that other house out of her head can she? Like it’s the best house ever and nothing will ever compare but honestly I don’t think she’s half arsed with looking for one that could be better, I couldn’t think of anything worse then moving back in with family after having a house of your own for so long. I understand some people have no choice but I don’t think she can peel her arse from the sofa at the moment to actually go and have a look at some

 

[Furnessian]

Can't do any form of exercise because of pre-existing conditions but can dance about like a madman in the kitchen every day. Alright, Jess. we believe you.