Jack Monroe #94 It’s okay Jack, others have taken up the baton

[LennyBriscoe]

JACK IS TAKING A BREAK FROM TV RIGHT NOW!

Aye, an enforced one! #saltylenny

 

[traumatised sideboard]

I am shocked to the core that she didn't do her Asda double-dip today, after I so confidently (or sarcastically) said that she would never give up.





Thrilled at the mention of even more furniture, she truly cannot help but give us unnecessary details about it. Was one of her 50 jobs as a sales rep for DFS or Oak Furniture Land at some point? Give us the specs, specifically how heavy it is, I need to know for my own satisfaction. Also she says she's been moving that table around 'loads' recently. What on earth is she doing? Is there even anywhere to move a table to? It sounds like that house is proper rammed with sideboards and sofas and bookshelves and radios and fridges, it must be like an obstacle course in there.

 

[Pocahontas]

I use the Oxford comma on formal emails as I think it can provide clarity.

I can't be doing with these Jonny come lately Oxford comma nay sayers.

I have to use it for work.
But when I’m on my own time, I see where the wind takes me. That’s how I get my thrills!

 

[Saint_clemmie]

no one should be donating to the Jack Monroe charity, it’s criminal that she’s even asking. Her poor decisions are on her.

We saw that the fan recently had donated £20 so could put pressure on her to return it, but what about the others? Is there no transparency at all with the Tip Jar feature? And I see she’s turned off the Patron total so we can’t see her monthly income like you can with some others. Why are you hiding it Jack?

 

[Tabitha D]

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Even tho she doesn’t do it til tomoz normally anyway

And there we have it. The £20 shop abandoned. I knew she’d get bored of it, she never keeps anything up for longer than a week or two. Pathetic.

 

[Fraggle]

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Hang on, since when has she costed ALL of those things into her recipes?

 

[JuliaGulia]

no one should be donating to the Jack Monroe charity, it’s criminal that she’s even asking. Her poor decisions are on her.

See, this is the thing. I believe she has massively overextended herself with her outgoings and manic spending.
There are so many things she could be doing to ameliorate this (top of the list being more affordable accommodation) but she isn't doing them. And it's because she doesn't want to. The world owes Jack a living, so everyone has to pay up and keep her in the style to which she has become accustomed...

 

[Tabitha D]

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God, doesn’t she ever stop?? Don’t share the recipes without making sure you talk about MEMEMEMEMEMEME, never mind if the recipes might help a poor family (doubtful IMO but just for the sake of argument ), that’s irrelevant it’s ALL ABOUT MEEEE!!!!
What a bloody appalling person she is.

 

[TurnedUpInTipp]

What I'd love to see is a cookbook written by her ACTUAL Mum.
The meals she used to put together for the family.
For the Dad who staggered in through the door smelling of smoke, for the dozens of foster kids, for the biological kids.
The family recipes that caused Jack to buy a Lasagne to stick her fingers into and marvel that there was mince in there.
Or a Mum and famous Aunt Helen collaboration of Northern Irish and Greek fusion food.
What a book that would be.

 

[nightfeedz]

I haven’t properly grunked through yet, but I feel compelled to say I have about the same amount of unopened post in my hall, thankfully not for traumatic reasons but because several previous occupants of my house have not been thorough with their address changes.

Perhaps a common occurrence in RENTED houses, no?

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Whoever she's trying to catfish is in for a shock when they meet her in real life that's all I'm saying

 

[MarthaFarkus]

Whilst I appreciate that people give money they can barely afford to Jack out of the goodness of their hearts, I still can’t get my head around how mind-numbingly stupid these people are. Maybe it’s how my brain works but my god! People are sitting there, reading her latest bullshittery and think it know, I’ll give my last £5 to someone on the internet who I’ve never met and don’t know. It’s utter, utter madness. I do have a shit ton of empathy for most situations but I just can’t when I read another screenshot of someone being ridiculous. Am I being harsh here? Aside from anything else, Jack has the hide of a rhino and should be throughly ashamed of herself.

PS. I really hate Matt Haig too, the self-indulgent twat. Yes, I had a mental breakdown too but I don’t wear it like a badge of honour. Like peas in a pod those two.

 

[Tabitha D]

Hunger tears a hole out of the very middle of you that nothing, not even 11 billion Cotswolds pieces of huge furniture, 3 mobile phones, a Viv (RIP) dress, an Emin...can ever plug. Tip jar and Paetron are available if any of you want to try though (sad pixie face)

She must be kicking herself that she posted a super-filtered touched up healthy-looking selfie earlier today. Normally in times like these she will drag out a thin, haggard selfie (also heavily shopped) for extra pity points. Missed a trick there, ey Jack?

 

[jenny2603]

Not sure you understand the concept of puddle tables. Or maybe the same friend, who gave her a smeg fridge and an original Emin, sent one round via stork?

Thinking of making my fortune via a series of childrens books about the adventures of a scrappy little urchin named Jack who chances upon a magic wishing puddle and is afforded the lifestyle of "one of them 'igh and mighty ladies of society, me old nan used to char for". I haven't worked out the story yet but it will contain the phrase "Cor blimey, it's only a flippin' Smeg" and her best mate will be a chimney sweep.

 

[BlendedSlop]

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You mean the same way you leave out the prices of half the ingredients in your "£20" shop meals, you disingenuous tit?

Also "my job", lol.

 

[FlashBoof]

And that was precisely her goal in posting those pictures. Fuck the starving children, poor little urchin Jack has bills to pay. Cough up cretins. She makes me physically sick.

And there it is, Ladies and Gentlemen. Share the blog posts, get the numbers up a couple of grand, and hit them with the “I am broke” bit. Who needs a real job, eh? Genuinely thinking of monetising my time in poverty. For one, my food is edible and my nails are clean and I have actual qualifications in cooking the stuff for folk to buy!

Jack. Stop spending. Move to a cheaper gaff. Sell sideboards and pizza ovens on eBay or FB marketplace. Move home if you have to. It’s better than the grift. You will sleep without pills. You and your kid will be warm.

 

[byropaw]

Just came back to say that anyone who says they are desperately, achingly middle class is desperately and achingly someone I laugh at acidly

(Jack did something acidly lately; she's back in Enid Blyton dealing with a villainous gardener)

But the bill pile! LOL! Even I spy the empty envelope, though I'm quite expecting Jack to "subtweet" an explanation for this shortly.

 

[Icing _on_ the_cake]

It's definitely private rentals that are the biggest problem. Renting is very expensive. Their needs to be a call for sensible rent prices to help people afford to pay them.

My brother lived in an all be it very nice flat for a time but the rent was extortionate, so he had to move.

I am in a professional job, earn around the national UK income and I can't afford anything but shared housing where I currently live. The sign of my relative wealth and privilege is I can afford a shared house with a living room. And if that's what someone doing a typical white collar job can afford where I live, what does it mean for people who earn below that?

If I got pregnant I'd have to abort even if I wanted the baby because I simply could not afford it - and I don't even see myself as 'poor' as Jack does - for the fact that I can afford a place with a living room and to put money in savings for emergencies and for the possibility of a house if I can move somewhere cheaper later on.

 

[Bugger13]

Stand back in amazement one and all.
Marcus, a young man who actually grew up in poverty, now an MBE, has built a massive movement that is actually making a difference.
But also, Jack pointed out that you need a tin opener to open cans (you usually don’t now but still, let’s not demean what a fabulous moment this was for those struggling & suffering).

 

[Pocahontas]

She had to mention it was made of mango wood because it's the heaviest wood there is.

(I have just made that up btw)

But she’s a frigging bodybuilding pescatarian. What’s the trouble here?