You’ve got to put on your best traaaazers and hoof it down to the Groucho, pronto.What I want to know is where does Jack find these friends? Because I am in the market for friends giving out expensive electronic goods, fridges, Tracy Emin's and designer clothes. I have some amazing friends but they've certainly let the side down here and I shall be having a word!
Genuinely, if she told me it was raining outside I’d still go to the window to check.I am pretty sure she said that you shouldn't cut sandwiches into triangles because the corners droop and you lose the filling, she argued at length with her son about it. Yet here we are with triple deck egg and shite butty cut into triangles. But I suppose that was THEN, and this is NOW.
Jack as you read here, I have a new word for you to play with. See if you can spot it in my next sentence.
Your floccinaucinihilipilification of non blue tickers offends me deeply.
She said in that British Library video piece last week that she cooks for a living. I beg to differ, she cooks to feed herself and her son. She has chosen to do that by trying weird and quite frankly bizarre ways and using food as an experiment. But, she does not cook for a job. If that were the case all of us on here cook for a job.
Couldn't agree more, you've hit the nail on the head. When was the last time she even posted a recipe? She was complaining the other day that she couldn't do 5 in one day but she doesn't even do one a fortnight.It is called feeding yourself. Just because she photographs her dinner (or tea if you like) and makes empty promises to write a recipe for it "later", it doesn't make it a job.
I think that’s the saddest sandwich I’ve ever seen. And I’m a regular at service stations on the M6 (She’s put bread on these. Gross. View attachment 274243
View attachment 274244View attachment 274246
Oh Jack my love, you are not famous enough for the DM to report on your every move. You are less relevant than a love island contestant who lasted 2 days (MIAOWWW)She has no need to go to the Daily Mail side piece about how many marble surfaces she has, when she can come here for her entire sideboard inventory.
I thought, Jack, might like to see her old friend Annunziata's brother enunciate it with such élan. As a Hansard aficionado, she will of course know that it is now the second longest word used on the Parliamentary estate, having been superseded by 'pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis' in 2017.
Hasn't she moved at least (random number between 10 and 30) times in the last decade. Why in the name of all that is holy, would she be carting about bags of unreadable receipts What's that you are saying Jack? oh, you have scanned them and saved them on a memory stick.Thermo paper receipts will not survive 9 yearsthey will either be blank or turn black she could be in for a shock when she turfs them out
It's those drums of parmesan cheese that look like dust and smell of vomit that you find with the long life pasta sauces and pizza bases like cardboard. The stuff we ate in the 70s and 80s that made people of a certain age say that hated parmesanwhat the hell is bombproof cupboard cheese?!
Béchamel? Well, dear, when a daddy horse loves beef mince, tomatoes and pasta very much...Isn't that how she "learnt to cook?"
By wandering aimlessly around the supermarket (no doubt to keep warm) reading labels & packets to work out what goes in to a Lasagne or whatever?
Cor blimey guv! Beef mince, tomatoes, pasta & béchemel? What the faaaaaaack is that?!
It's the endless and unnecessary lies that get to me too. Today's mithering nonsense about seeing the headteacher at the school gates, much the same as the silly story about what a governor at her school was supposed to have said to her parents.You’ve got to put on your best traaaazers and hoof it down to the Groucho, pronto.
And if you see Jude Law, tell him to sit the fuck down
Genuinely, if she told me it was raining outside I’d still go to the window to check.
What is with the pointless lies? I remember the sandwich convo she said she and SB had, was that not around about the same time as The Injury?
Half tempted to set up my own patreon and tag all the Tory cunts on Twitter and ask them to top up my NHS wage instead of clapping. But then again I’m not a begging cunt with a taste in expensive furniture. And even if I was I much prefer Ercol.Ah, but if the 67 patreon subscribers who have joined in the past fortnight are there for the ThriftyShadesOfBeige Club then Jack's just topped up her monthly income by £670.
I am reading before dinner, small victories! Love you Cabal, you are so funny!Skeevy coloured butter - Jack and her way with words strike again
Jack Monroe #88 She might as well face that she's addicted to stuffI don't think that Jack knows what her own taste is, anymore than she really knows who she is. All she knows is to throw money at something, whether it's multiple Cotswold sideboards, Apple tech, Burberry scarf and coats, fashionable trainers or whatever. There's nothing that's as cheap as chips but she loves anyway. She just tries to buy taste and a personality but it's really not working.
Not a vegan, but in total agreement. A bit like when shops started signalling about how a pineapple or raw chicken or slab of butter is GLUTEN-FREE a few years ago.I really dislike when people describe food as specifically vegan, when it is just naturally vegan. I get 'vegan sausage' to differentiate from the more common 'pork sausage', but porridge usually/often is vegan anyway. It's like saying penne al pomodoro is vegan or a slice of watermelon is vegan. I mean, yes, you are correct, but I don't think anyone would describe a roast chicken as non-vegan. It just makes no sense to me.
I think part of the reason it's tedious is because it reinforces this stereotypes that vegan dishes are complicated, joyless or just a replacement for 'real' food. None of which are true and if you are a 90% vegan you should know this.
Or Corn Flakes: "A Low-Fat Food"Not a vegan, but in total agreement. A bit like when shops started signalling about how a pineapple or raw chicken or slab of butter is GLUTEN-FREE a few years ago.
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