Jack Monroe #79 Big mistake. Big. HUGE.

[PoorPatrol]

Im confused....The pineapple thing? To eat with what? Does she just make these weird things because she’s bored? Or did she find a pineapple in a park and has given up finding the owner of it? I still have so many questions about her.

To eat with the curried liver, obvs! And a nice chianti

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

But the pictures look different to Jack's pictures.

...is the least surprising sentence I have ever read.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

How many days till deadline?

 

[Silver Linings]

tweeted and deleted.

Wishing you hadn’t made it up said anything?

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Does anyone else think Jack costing recipes with "sausages 2 - 10p (Asda Smartprice 20 for £1”) is totally devious and an attempted stealth boast gone wrong?

You can't buy two sausages on their own for 10p so it's factually incorrect and yet another talking her way around the truth. The whole costings are utter shite.

 

[BlendedSlop]

FFS. I'm sorry (and I generally don't like disbelieving people when they talk about illness etc), but burnout from WHAT!? Twitter diarrhoea? It's not like she works in a high pressure career or even a job where stress can creep up due to an escalating workload - her work is, for want of a better expression, in the public eye. So surely we'd all see the end results of all the overworking she's allegedly been doing? From what I can see from her online activity - and you'd better believe we'd have heard ALL about the amazing work she'd been doing - she's essentially sat on her arse for the better part of six months and has now tried to write a book in the last few weeks. She makes my blood boil.

 

[Miss Anne Thrope]

'Find what you love and let it kill you'

And she has Hippocrate’s ‘First do no harm’ on her arm. Highly ironic, given how she repeatedly targets and attacks people on social media. She should read her arms more often.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Can we also remember that this ‘Finding two DVD’s to pawn’ and ‘Finding £3 in coppers down the back of the sofa’ is a total contradiction to her big American yard sale that yielded £3,000?!

Some more inconsistencies;

1) £3 in change isn’t heavier than a 93kg Costwold Co sideboard, but priorities.
2) She CHOSE to live this life. And most likely didn’t live it as her son has a father who was around at the time and could have asked her parents for help at any point. She chose not to.
3) She does not like to ‘eat well’ eg. Look at any of her offerings she cooks
4) She sure as hell isn’t feeding her son a meal of 1500 calories for his dinner. Look at the shite she’s serving up to the poor lad

 

[kgaff3]

Buying the yellow sticker stuff for herself makes me so mad !!!! Because she doesn't need to!!!! Does she not ever think back all those many many years ago when she had a poor 5 minutes and she went to the supermarket with her last £1 to buy something yellow stickered to feed her starving Son only to find some rich fucker had nabbed it all first? Unbelievable and selfish!

 

[lilamay]

 

[PoorPatrol]

How many days till deadline?

Sorry Jack, you’ve already squeezed ‘burnout’ dry! Wouldn’t she have already looked up/found resources the first time she fake had it? Lying cow. Anyway, what are her Jackolytes possibly going to advise, when she’s tried EVERYTHING!

 

[Alansbigplate]

Wait. What does everyone else do to the kitchen floor at the end of the day? Hoover every night?

I don’t get why she’s mopping as well. Probs to make out she does loads more than everyone else, but I do a quick sweep of the kitchen floor. It gets loads of food crap on it

I’m a fucking slattern I just kick it all in the corner

 

[Alansbigplate]

aye, but then you remember where he's been. and that time he wrote Insania. he's made some bad choices

If I weren’t into z-list celebs who make bad choices would I even be here, dear heart?

 

[kachoochoo]

oh my god sweet baby jesus.

eta the raw gut spilling tedium would probably be more amusing than this. please post it.

 

[Veronicaaa]

View attachment 258342

Hasn't she said before that the landlord didn't allow dogs, and that she only got away with Cooper by the skin of his nose her teeth?

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

What's the betting that her homemade draught excluders will look suspiciously like something from the Cotswolds Co. That is of course supposing that they actually materialise. That maverick brain has no attention span.

You can make them out of old scarves, you know.

Bit like these (£20), but perhaps a slightly different colour.

 

[Incywincy]

 

[Tabitha D]

I really wish her and CleaninwithMario would get together and do a cooking collaboration. Both self absorbed, egomaniacs and neither of them can cook . It would be a boujee, bespoke and glorious hot mess. Aren't Dhansak curries meant to be mild and sweet, not sour and bitter lemon. so basically she just made a bog standard curry with sour notes

Dhansak happens to be my all time favourite curry - made properly, it is aromatic, a bit tangy and a bit sweet, contains several different types of dhal and a multitude of spices (including fenugreek, black cardamom, coriander seed etc). The recipe is pretty complex.
Jack has just bunged in some garam masala and curry powder, and thinks that because it’s got lentils in that makes it a dhansak. (And no, lemon juice is not a substitute for tamarind).
As Jack herself would say, it’s like jollof rice all over again.