Jack Monroe #76 £300 mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the poorest of us all?

[Ninch55]

In the first of the quotes from above.....
"I take criticism as well as nice comments, what a daft thing to say"
Followed in the same paragraph by
"I'm sorry.........that you felt the need to hurt my feelings about it."

So you can't take criticism because it hurts your feelings, therefore not such a daft thing to say at all.

Either you can accept criticism in the way it is intended, to inform you when things are not up to an acceptable standard. Or you get hurt when someone gives you negative feedback. You can't have it both ways.

(I directed that to her, as we all know she is reading here.)

She is such an absolute twit. Jack, we know you come here to read so here I am. Stop lying and stop promising shite that you are never going to deliver. It’s really simple. Just stop telling lies and being ridiculous. Why does everyone feel like they have to turn into your mother? You’re a very silly little girl who whines and lies when she gets caught out. Grow up and shut the duck up unless you’re going to deliver on what you’ve promised.

 

[MancBee]

It's bizarre to me that her first instinct was to "check her database" and accuse the poster of not being on the (no doubt meticulously kept!) list of people who bought the book.

She didn't think that Lara might be a partner of someone who paid for the book, or someone who uses a nickname online rather than her real one, or someone who has since changed their name "a la" Jack, or someone like my partner who uses both their first and second given name interchangeably (I know, I find it odd too, but he does it all the time.)

She starts her reply with an accusation, because she can not accept that a person that really had bought her book may have a negative view of it, ergo, she can't be a real purchaser.

 

[emmer_moans]

She tweets an awful lot for someone who basically lost the use of her hands two years ago

Her hands are probably in permanent claw shape because she holds her phone and uses her thumbs so much to tweet. Like Chandler from Friends when he gets addicted to the pacman arcade machine

 

[Raker]

I am northern Irish and I honestly never had my first taste in instant mash until I was at uni. ( It wasn't nice) we grew up poor but my mum always had potatoes and we even grew our own.

I’m Northern Irish and I’ve never had instant mash — not keen (love champ though), but definitely agree. Surely actual potatoes are easier, cheaper, more nutritious — unless ... you’re living in the Space Station?

Hmm, maybe JM is an actual Space Cadet

 

[MancBee]

I’m Northern Irish and I’ve never had instant mash

Babe, same.

Well I'm not Northern Irish, but I've never had instant mash. Never felt the need.

 

[Ninch55]

Babe, same.

Well I'm not Northern Irish, but I've never had instant mash. Never felt the need.

I had it when I was at university- Sainsbury’s did a really good instant mash and I was really skint at the time. I’ve upgraded to Rooster potatoes now - FANCY.

 

[Captainmouse]

It's bizarre to me that her first instinct was to "check her database" and accuse the poster of not being on the (no doubt meticulously kept!) list of people who bought the book. Nobody who is actually confidenppe that they've done their job well gets on the defensive that fast.

Jack will always fall back on blaming it on years of trolling, and I appreciate she has received some abuse, but deep down it's because she knows that her recipes are plagiarised, poorly conceived or flat out untested.

I've been this person. I see it clear as day.

her recipes are plagiarised, poorly mangled and flat out untested. every recipe she announces as 'new' 'original' has been stolen and not credited, she mucks it about to make it inedible, and never ever tests it or tastes it.

 

[Upthisweek]

I’m Northern Irish and I’ve never had instant mash — not keen (love champ though), but definitely agree. Surely actual potatoes are easier, cheaper, more nutritious — unless ... you’re living in the Space Station?

Hmm, maybe JM is an actual Space Cadet

Asda do a 2kg of general potatoes for 57p and the instant mash that has shockingly bad reviews and contains all sorts of crap is 28p. It would make more sense to buy real potatoes, unless she's saying she couldn't carry them.

I have one of those old ladies trolleys for my shopping as I don't have a car. Essential if you're on a budget and want good quality ingredients.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

It's bizarre to me that her first instinct was to "check her database" and accuse the poster of not being on the (no doubt meticulously kept!) list of people who bought the book. Nobody who is actually confident that they've done their job well gets on the defensive that fast.

Jack will always fall back on blaming it on years of trolling, and I appreciate she has received some abuse, but deep down it's because she knows that her recipes are plagiarised, poorly conceived or flat out untested.

I've been this person. I see it clear as day.

Yes! “I didn’t send it to a Lara so you must be a troll! That way I can absolve all responsibility and pretend I’m completely perfect in every way!”

TBH she could have said much worse than “your book is meh”

 

[Alansbigplate]

Do breadcrumbs belong on top of a lasagne?

No.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

What’s happened to the AF kombucha?

I thought it was going to be the game changing product JM has, but not a word about it since two days ago!

 

[emmer_moans]

Asda do a 2kg of general potatoes for 57p and the instant mash that has shockingly bad reviews and contains all sorts of crap is 28p. It would make more sense to buy real potatoes, unless she's saying she couldn't carry them.

I have one of those old ladies trolleys for my shopping as I don't have a car. Essential if you're on a budget and want good quality ingredients.

When I was a student I actually took a flight suitcase so I could walk 2 miles to the big Tesco, buy heavy things, like butter tubs and tin cans, and then loaded it up and walked it back to my halls, lol. No one I knew had a car as we had no parking at halls and I couldn't drive at the time. I should have had a granny trolley, aha. I did this because the other shop closer to halls was a Spar and it had appalling range of choice and was quite pricey.

I wonder what will be a problem today for Jackie...

 

[Ninch55]

No.
[/QUOTE
Crushed cornflakes and crisps don’t, either.

 

[crystaleyesd]

2. Do breadcrumbs belong on top of a lasagne?

They're to soak up the horse spunk juuuuuuust on the off chance it doesn't 'thicken in the oven'.

Instant mash makes good speedy potato cakes (mix with butter and flour and seasoning and form into patties then bake) but that is ALL it is good for.

 

[Ninch55]

They're to soak up the horse spunk juuuuuuust on the off chance it doesn't 'thicken in the oven'.

Instant mash makes good speedy potato cakes (mix with butter and flour and seasoning and form into patties then bake) but that is ALL it is good for.

Add finely chopped chives and spring onions to that. Jack, I’m watching, don’t steal my ideas.

 

[Alansbigplate]

Hmm, we haven't heard much about Jack's crippling arthritis in a long time. If we mention it here in a few posts, she'll have a flare-up by the end of the week, right?

I feel terrible. I never even thought that the reason she takes photos with her tongue is because she lost full use of her hands at the age of 29

 

[Montrachet]

Honestly this thread has been the best yet, I have laughed out loud so much today! I must have liked/laughed on nearly every comment. Brenda’s sausages, words fail me

fraus you have all out done yourselves, now duck off

The BBC this morning sought Brenda's reaction to news that a 77th Jack Monroe thread was on the way.

 

[Ellabella]

If she is able to tweet non-stop, cut veg up into tiny pieces, use a pen/PC to write, colour very small squares on pointless spreadsheets, cook non-stop, shave her own head and saw down For Sale signs then her hands work just fine. Unless an excuse is needed for being unable to meet every single bleeping deadline.

 

[lilamay]

I’m Northern Irish and I’ve never had instant mash — not keen (love champ though), but definitely agree. Surely actual potatoes are easier, cheaper, more nutritious, unless you’re living in the Space Station?

Hmm, maybe JM is an actual Space Cadet

I've often thought Jack's food looked like astronaut food.

top - actual space food, bottom - Jack's food

 

[FlashBoof]

“Full use of her hands” is another extremely ambiguous statement (shock, horror). She means they aren’t as good as they were but knows it can be interpreted as a lot worse than they actually are.

Those other Brenda cook offs. Kudos to the person who found them. When I clicked on her profile it was one of those competition sharing ones and I could not be bothered at all with it. Imagine making that stuff and freezing extra! Wow.
If the new thread title doesn’t include a mention of Brenda then I am afraid I might have to duck off!