Jack Monroe #75 Peekaboo

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Just chuck it in a curry babes.
 
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To gauge how many are here, we should all google 'Jack Monroe tattle'

I hope someone says to the squiggle to hold out buying that shite for a week to see a blog about it (or better yet never!)

And the ones calling for a second DKL. wonder what they took away from the first?
 
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She wants a lockdown so she can spend time with Matts forearms again.
To be fair I’d be happy to spend more time with Sir Matt of the forearms.

And the ones calling for a second DKL. wonder what they took away from the first?
That show got me through the first two weeks, I mean to be fair it wasn’t really the show it was the commentary on here but without the show we wouldn’t be here! I am grateful. (God knows what the twitter fans enjoyed about it!)
 
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The rabbit is going to eat better than her son this week. All to prove a point (that doesn't need proving). What a contemptible piece of shit she is.
 
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She's become one of those mums shoving chips through the school fence and whining about THAT MAN taking away turkey twizzlers. Because authentically working class = proud to eat shit, in her eyes.
I have an image of her yelling against healthy food. much like the face she pulled when she had that teething necklace
 
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I don’t know why she doesn’t just cut out the middle man and stick it straight in the bin
 
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The worst thing about those eyeball-bollocks sausages, is that they are probably destined to go into her ‘famous’ sausagne

You know. That über Maverick meal she makes from raw sausages and uncooked tinned tomatoes. To quote Sir Matt of the Forearms... “TERRIBLE”
 
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Was no one awake to witness the 23 minutes of the Czech tweet at 2am????! 'Are you all OK?' it roughly translated to. 9 replies. Then POOOOF....twas gone
 
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The Asda food shop is ridiculous. She hates food doesn’t she?
How is she making meals out of that random selection of food? Arseholes cooked in lard, anyone?
She’s a cook who’s written cookbooks...why is she buying packet mix?! I do not believe this has anything to do with budget and everything to do with the fact she’s lazy.

£20 a week shop for 2? I could do that.
Infact I just have

Cottage pie - 4 portions so 2 meals covered (if you’re not a greedy goblin). Bulk the mince with lentils
Honey and lemon chicken thighs with potatoes and mixed veg
Chicken thighs stuffed with cream cheese served with potatoes and mixed veg
Cream cheese pasta and peas
Pizza (as a treat)
Tomato and cheese pasta
Cereal and milk for breakfast
Cheese cucumber and mayo sandwiches for lunch
6 pack of crisps
Orange squash
Ok so it’s NOT fun food there but it IS food and that’s breakfast, lunch and dinner covered. £19.84 at tesco (I can provide the receipts ) for everything including pasta and cereal. I assumed the letdown larder was empty.
 
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The servers are back! When the site was down it actually crossed my mind that THIS was jackie's master plan...kill Tattle
 
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Was no one awake to witness the 23 minutes of the Czech tweet at 2am????! 'Are you all OK?' it roughly translated to. 9 replies. Then POOOOF....twas gone
She really is the queen of procrastination. Got an imminent deadline? Time to start learning Czech!
 
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She wants a lockdown so she can spend time with Matts forearms again.
The thing is, if she'd not been so terrible on DKL, she'd no doubt have been invited back on Saturday Kitchen and got to see Sir Matt of Forearms on the regular!
 
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Hurrah and Wilkommen to all new Fraus.

Loving the fact that you haven't read Thread #31 yet.....

Was no one awake to witness the 23 minutes of the Czech tweet at 2am????! 'Are you all OK?' it roughly translated to. 9 replies. Then POOOOF....twas gone
tell us more!
 
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Starting to get seriously worried by these hidden messages now. Will our coven need to lawyer up?

Also hello to any fraus who are also awake at this time
Don’t be worried - that’s what she wants.
 
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Was no one awake to witness the 23 minutes of the Czech tweet at 2am????! 'Are you all OK?' it roughly translated to. 9 replies. Then POOOOF....twas gone
Ooh. Love the intrigue that comes with these threads. What did the replies say?

<Alison Steadman's "It's all the drama, Mick. I just love it!">
 
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What has she got planned for us?? I for one am less concerned about the (non-existant) case, but I am quaking at the thought of a lockdown larder. It has an even greater jeopardy now she’s apparently lost her sense smell and taste.
 
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https://giphy.com/eestfgviuTuVi
Welcome!
 
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Wait, wait, wait there is no need to worry about SB eating repulsive eyeball sausages. We all know she received an Ocado delivery with bountiful M&S supplies (source Pinky Meek). She and SB will be lying on sofas (or sideboards) all week, eating sumptuous food. Any picture she posts as food they’ve eaten from their Asda haul is just a lie

https://giphy.com/12NlCFUvTokWXe
 
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What has she got planned for us?? I for one am less concerned about the (non-existant) case, but I am quaking at the thought of a lockdown larder. It has an even greater jeopardy now she’s apparently lost her sense smell and taste.
How does she notice? uncooked, blitzed, slop is unidentifiable surely
 
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