Jack Monroe #524 Not the only or most important voice and presence in this critical area of our life

[Lazarus]

I would LOVE SB to come on.

If you're reading SB, sign up and tell us what MamaPapa’s mummy's been up to and I'll post you a vape and a Sega Mega drive or whatever the kids are going wild for these days.

ETA dead at the "craft" business being called Bread and Jam. You stupid cunt, guest. Send crocheted coffinos

FTFY, dear heart.

 

[Wooh]

Yes, thank(space)you. I hate reading 'just taking a seat!'or 'just parking!'
comments for the first two pages of a new thread.

Also, about the alleged Emin, she said the story was a wild ride but all it was was her cooking something then her friend gave her a drawing?

That was neither wild nor a ride, Jack 'Training Wheels' Munroe.

Add that to the list.

ETA

F

Haahaaaa joking
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there's so much going on here... the hashtags... the "keynote"... the idea that standing on your tiptoes to do anything is some kind of maverick, revolutionary act... the affiliate link... SUFFRAGETTEISH! this is absolutely BONKERS! thankspaceyou for sharing

I see 90s baby lesbian removing piercings and rolling down sleeves to return home for Christmas

 

[griftalo]

That German friendship cake looks like the best thing I’ve seen her claim to have produced. It looks edible.

 

[griftalo]

When I was a pov (and not just chronically skint as I am now) I would buy a tin of Happy Shopper rice pudding from the corner shop, I think it was about 10p*, and my children would have that cold for dinner.

*if only I had painstakingly kept records of what food cost back then, so I could forensically and repeatedly regurgitate my pov story in a manner that may rival guest's.

I’m so sorry things were so hard for you. I hope things are better now.

I looked today after seeing Guest’s shit offerings, at the calories in cheap rice pudding in our cupboard and it’s 648 iirc per tin (I’m so excruciatingly and consumptively exhausted that I may suffer a myocardial infarction of the biggest and most majestic size ever known if I have to rouse myself to scamper painfully downstairs to check, plus my bones will crumble away to dust) , so looking at her low cal offerings you made a much better choice. For an adult if you could only eat two tins a day for a few days, you wouldn’t die. It might not be the best but you wouldn’t technically starve.

 

[Tabitha D]

Seeing as the Fraus are in a kindly way, could someone explain Terrible to me please? I've hunted high and low for splains but can't find diddle. 🥹

ETA sorry guys, I got ahead of myself posting this needy request. I've now grunked far enough to discover Yel's creation. x 7 billion. That's absolute solid GOLD. I hope she's seen that. The derision on his face is as obvious as jack's fillers. Fucking hell.

It’s superb isn’t it. I will never not find that funny.

 

[I'm not actually here]

Be a waste of money, dear heart, the reason being practically nobody in Essex gives a shiny shit about her. You’d ideally want to fly it over the Guardian-reading enclaves within London, Stroud, etc. to have an impact on her enablers and few remaining fans.


Agreed, I remember being quite annoyed when she bothered to reappear last time after she’d been quiet for a while, The canal had been having a jolly old time eviscerating her decade’s worth of absolute bollocks. Plus having some worthwhile discussions on class and framing; and psychology of people like Jack and their enablers and all that stuff too. And some smart points on the lack of accountability for online money platforms as well as lack of accountability for grifters. Was all good stuff. Then she bloody well did a chaos, and we had to break away from our thoughtful mitherings in order to address the new load of absolute bollocks she was coming out with. I resented her a bit for that

OK, full page ad in the Graun?! Or a supplement?! Like the old G2 pull out but dedicated entirely to her and..... forensiiiiiic! Prob double the Grauniad readership and stop them begging as much.

Apparently, I have read 16 articles in the last year and now they want money from me...... Who'd have guest who they were about?!

I won (well, claimed) a fiver earlier (grey jumper spotted at 100 paces) so I will start the funding with that.

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

I have some (good) quite large tattoos including one on my upper arm and even I sometimes look at them and think, "what the fuck did I do that for?"

If I had that wonky, wobbly, badly executed shite done by someone with no talent on me I'd simply cut off my own arm.

Frankly, if it was on my arm, if necessary I would chew off my own limb . . .

 

[Redwool]

It's funny.
You want a chaos but then if it's a hilarious one and it's bad timing as you are working you end up trying to not look like you have a UTI because you're visiting the loo so often to catch up.

I'm half dreading a chaos, struggling to keep up as it is...

 

[freya]

I think it’s something to do with her eggs. That’s the last thing I read about mayo. My only of just shy of a year OH (not their age) wonders why this is my comfort thread. I don’t think I can ever tell them why.

ETA fucked up my grammar/auto text or whatever it’s called and “inexplicable” should be in there somewhere. Unrelated.

 

[Cat Face]

If she reviewed me I don’t think I’d come across at all well
I like her reviews but she manifests a bit like a frightening incarnation of Charlie Brooker.

Grace Dent & Charlie Brooker are - or at least used to be - quite good friends.

 

[overdueanadventure]

Are you saying you don't think that was awfully Molly? Not sure why anyone would pretend to be her. Wouldn't gain much .

I don't have an opinion on whether the poster is who they say are, but trolling is just for shits & giggles isn't it? Not to gain anything as such. Getting one over on others, causing a ruckus, I suppose.

 

[Dr.CM]

Yes.

The meaning behind this crap drawing is letting go of toxic relationships as they suck the life out of you.

Which is rich coming from jack who I wholeheartedly believe to be the source of toxicity in any relationship she's been in, romantic or otherwise. It must be like dating ground zero at Chernobyl.

Aha! Thanks for this info. So the woman has sucked the life out of the skeleton (who was probably a man)?

So this is like an old sailor's tattoo or something, commiserating that the ex wife has near enough destroyed them?

So guest got a tattoo of herself, this explains why she's 'obsessed' with it. Narcissus gazing at his reflection.

 

[Captainmouse]

97 person AA meeting in her back garden.

Ooo are we counting chairs 🪑 again?

 

[Seaford Haggington]

Imagine being this thick, this loudly.

She imagines herself a "supermarket expert". Piteous.

 

[MaineCoonMama]

In the sneaked in link she refers to Cameron's keynote speech. He was Chairman and therefore laid out the theme(s) for discussion, which is precisely what a keynote is. And is NOT anything she has EVER, ever, ever done or been asked to do. Sitting on a panel or doing a Q&A /conversation =/= a keynote. Fucking aneurysm right there for me. Again!

Not laughing at your distress, tenderhead, just laughing at how clueless Jack is. Keynote bugs me greatly as well.

 

[MooBelle]

She was already a little pisspot on her blog way before the Guardian. Let’s not forget “the satirical comic twist that she writes with”
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She was constantly bickering in the comments too. Her readers ALL KEPT MISSING THE POINT SHE WAS MAKING IN THE ARTICLE!!!

Spoiler: SS

You’re missing the point! View attachment 2286265View attachment 2286268And YOU and YOU are missing the point! View attachment 2286276View attachment 2286277View attachment 2286279YOU ARE AAAAAAALLLLLLL MISSING THE POINT!!!
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ETA For those of you who have never seen this, this is the BEST EVER (by miles!) Jack response to a reader letter that is a tad dickish, published in the local Southend paper YEARS after she’s become famous, after two books, Leggy, and just after she got the honorary doctorate. It’s so over the top it’s fucking hilarious (AND it has photographic evidence of the arguments she’s making!). She even WARNS the Editor and the paper.
View attachment 2286286

Dear Mr Farrington, The Mail believes oral sex and Pringles give you cancer. Maybe you shouldn't believe what they write about me either.

Dear Editor, It appears that your correspondent P. Farrington in Tuesdays Letters page has fallen foul of the first rule of Common Sense and Decency that is, do not believe a word that...

web.archive.org

The thumbs akimbo picture is back, hoorah!!!

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Here was the boop boop- accompanied by a rattle rattle
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Well - that was money wasted, wasn't it?

 

[rogueapostrophe]

No bloody way I'd stay at that guest house.

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I thought it was more of a slum-dwelling/halfway-house than a touristy guesthouse?

 

[hereforthechaos]

I enjoyed if that's the word the slop along immensely. I thought I'd witnessed the full breadth and depth of her culinary crimes but I'd missed these fishy horrors. I'm right of my breakfast

 

[Dr.CM]

Her tattoos are so bad that I sort of half wonder if she didn't pay a fair price for some of them, but blagged them on the promise of 'exposure for tatting a big celeb like me' type of thing. It would be a very Jack thing to do, exploiting actual working people.

I've always assumed that and it has never crossed my mind she pays for them.