Jack Monroe #523 Everything she does is pointless busywork that solves nothing

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Morning ninnies! Been lurking, grunking, hooting, fizzing, pissing and eating sandwiches since DKL. Been looking forward to joining you but had to wait (Tattle was full but it hadn’t LEFT).
I went to Hay this year with a friend I suspected was a Frau. We didn’t see guest but there were copies of GK in the bookshop, I pointed to one and went “HONK!!” Ninnies, she was not a Frau 🤦‍♀️
 
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Here’s another one! I am LEGITIMATELY utterly confused by guest’s ongoing delusions regarding her “muscles”.

How Jack describes herself.
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Actual “1978 Showaddywaddy fan of the year, as seen in Blue Jeans magazine” Jack at the EXACT SAME time.
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Like, seriously- I need someone to explain this to me.
 
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Am on the way to a funeral with mother in law in tow.. she must be related to Jack as she’s making this day all about herself.. witch. Anyway, I wanted to say, welcome all new mavens, your stories are keeping me sane on this long journey (don’t worry I’m not the one dry)
Now duck off x
 
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So he at least knows he's lying, I guess? I sometimes wonder whether Jack realises she does it. It's so strange to me that someone who lies so much can say, over and over again, that she ~literally can't lie~. It's so delusional.
I think she's a bit of both and there's a difference in her reaction to being called out based on which one it is.

There are the lies that have a grain of truth to them that I think she genuinely believes: eg her "I didn't use a filter" because in her brain portrait mode is a mode, it's not a filter so she didn't use one and isn't lying. A lot of the pov backstory falls into this too, and I reckon by now she's lied so much about some aspects of it that the lies feel more true to her than the actual recollection would, she's convinced herself she was desperately poor so she's not consciously lying about it anymore. She'll defend all of these to the hilt, digging herself into even greater holes and getting very, very upset she's been accused of lying.

Then there are some (big D firing his cannon thing) that I think she must know is a lie but she can't control herself. She doesn't tend to defend those when they happen, they just get quietly deleted when people start calling them out/the real life consequences come knocking.
 
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Here’s another one! I am LEGITIMATELY utterly confused by guest’s ongoing delusions regarding her “muscles”.

How Jack describes herself.
View attachment 2281462View attachment 2281474

Actual “1978 Showaddywaddy fan of the year, as seen in Blue Jeans magazine” Jack at the EXACT SAME time.
View attachment 2281464View attachment 2281473Like, seriously- I need someone to explain this to me.
If she’d said most of her readers think she’s a Hasidic wife thanks to that photo it would have been believable.
 
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My dear old mum worked with a girl who is that same age as me and went to the same school, my mum told me her name and i was like yeah i remember her, to which my mum responded she says she doesnt remember me... devasted! In reailty i really couldnt care less, i knew of her and not always for nice reasons and well i havent spoken to her or added her to any sm since i left school. So in reailty who cares.
 
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Hello to all the new people. I never understood the code thing anyway when people mentioned it, could I generate a code? Did I have that power? WFK.

I think Jack lies for various reasons. I think for all her aren't I great and amazing rants she really dislikes herself and is deeply insecure, as most Narcs are.
Her lies are her go to, they raise her up , it doesn't matter if they are easily seen as lies , she again like Narcs do, believes everyone else is stupid and won't see they are lies.
This is why when she sees people have exposed her she has to self medicate ❄ then the rage rants start.

Most people would have got help for this tit circle years ago , and to be fair she has tried rehab and I do believe she has had therapy at times. It doesn't work for Narcs though usually.

Anyway thanks for listening to my TED talk and duck off x
 
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It really does take a full-on fan to refer to themselves as "hilarious". That's for other people to say, not you.

Also, she isn't funny.
 
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I think she's a bit of both and there's a difference in her reaction to being called out based on which one it is.

There are the lies that have a grain of truth to them that I think she genuinely believes: eg her "I didn't use a filter" because in her brain portrait mode is a mode, it's not a filter so she didn't use one and isn't lying. A lot of the pov backstory falls into this too, and I reckon by now she's lied so much about some aspects of it that the lies feel more true to her than the actual recollection would, she's convinced herself she was desperately poor so she's not consciously lying about it anymore. She'll defend all of these to the hilt, digging herself into even greater holes and getting very, very upset she's been accused of lying.

Then there are some (big D firing his cannon thing) that I think she must know is a lie but she can't control herself. She doesn't tend to defend those when they happen, they just get quietly deleted when people start calling them out/the real life consequences come knocking.
Many of your second category seem to come from her telling stories of "how things ought to have happened".

I suspect that they're born of shame or embarrassment or upset - "if I hadn't left early in a huff, then dad would have delighted everyone with his canon-firing antics", "if we hadn't had that fight, we'd have ended up tangling our limbs together in the pool", "if I'd made the trifle the day before rather than throwing it together in a panic at 6am, then everyone would have tucked in greedily and declared it the best ever".
 
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Didn’t she claim that her “friends” wrote this for her? Of course, these “friends” also don’t know how to use apostrophes. What a coincidence!
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The magic of Jack is that 2 things can be equally true at the same time! I said I don't think she currently 'earns' that much but as you have rightly pointed out she manages to spend an absolute duck load of money. This is why hundreds of folk have been posting here for years on end picking it all apart & getting nowhere. My wild speculation pulled out of my ear is that she rinsed her last 3 partners, she is definitely a 'oops forgot my wallet / can you cover this while I move some money to my account' she spunked any advances & one off payments (hellmans etc) the second they hit her account which accounts for the ridiculous consumer goods inventory but that her regular income is quite low (relatively speaking!) & is rapidly diminishing. x
I imagine that her parents and wider relatives are generous to her and SB because they don't want to be accused in print of stopping her breathing and that SB's father gives her a regular monthly amount to keep her off his back ticking over.

Also, I wonder about this Breitling bling, did she really have it as far back as the weekend in Dordrecht (sp?), if not, where's it come from? That's a very flashy gift indeed.

How can she even countenance wearing it publically when she's on the beg and wearing that repulsive povo jumper - she's got no conscience or morals or even paranoia? Anyone normal in her shoes would be like OK I'm making my living about living on the breadline, I've grifted my patreons, I'm writing about not being able to afford my rent, better not wear that watch anywhere in public.
 
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I see the watch as a big duck off to anyone who questions her. It's so cocky , almost like saying I can literally get away with anything.

Scamanda was the same. For anyone who hasn't listened to the podcast it's interesting some of the parallels with guest.
 
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The best episode ever. I honestly get so much joy from it. (was your dad a wetter, Jim? 😂)
Tom Courtenay’s most famous character is Jack to a T (Billy Liar).
Jocelyn, David Junior’s mum in the Royle Family, starred alongside Tom Courtenay in Billy Liar, as his girlfriend. Her characters name, I hear you ask? BORBRA BARBARA!

Anyway, hello new people, nice to have you here.

ETA: would any of the new members who previously kindly donated to Jack care to divulge how much it was they gave?
I donated £20 to her tipjar thinking I was bravely and painstakingly paying for a month’s worth of shopping.
 
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I have no idea why, but I was just re-reading the Burger Boy saga. She really hasn’t done any growing or maturing in her attitude to sex (or anything else, let’s face it) in the last 10 years, has she?

2013: GUESS WHAT, EVERYONE! I’VE GOT A LOVEBITE!!!
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Did you miss it the first time? I’ve got a LOVEBITE, everyone!!!
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In case you missed it the first twice, PAY ATTENTION!!! I’VE GOT A LOVEBITE!!!
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2017: I’m SHAGGING! And making wacky innuendos about VIBRATORS! And ORGASMS! Geddit? SEX!
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2022: I’VE JUST HAD A SHAAAAAAAG!!! And you are all well jel!
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