Jack Monroe #523 Everything she does is pointless busywork that solves nothing

[BenignNarcissist]

Hello, new frau here, almost broke my keyboard in my haste to sign up when I saw registrations were open.

Have refrained from posting an origin story so far as I've been BUSY, but wanted to say hello, as I've been grunking here for about a year now.

I was a fan of Jack until I tweeted something about the Katie Hopkins case (cos duck KH) and someone told me to Google for Tattle and Jack, and Teemill. I got distracted by the Vonny threads as a friend used to work with her but then back here I came to grunk for eternity.

I'm pleased to have been mentioned here as a squig on my now deleted Twitter, and this place has kept me sane when Jacko made me cross.

I'm an actual WC, ex pov, diagnosed ADHD and CPTSD having leftie, and having this pulsating buttmunch cosplaying makes me very cross indeed.

Thankspaceyou for all you do. I'll dip back out now and make sure my contributions are meaningful.

You worked with Vonny? Please do tell us more...

 

[Veronicaaa]

She will absolutely show up at Greenmelt.

She knows support is fading. She's shown up at everything she's been booked at this year because she knows she can't afford to do a no-show. In the years when she was riding high, she could not turn up and people would just be concerned. Now she knows it looks bad and bar these low-end festival bookings and QT, what work has she actually had in the last twelve months?

Also, I was watching the Jimmy Saville documentary (bear with me) on Netflix last week and there was a psychologist on there who said that people like him who do bad stuff in plain sight have an undeveloped sense of shame. It made me think of guest because lots of people have said that had they been caught out doing the twattery she's done, they'd never leave the house. Even if the need to continue the grift is the driving force behind her showing her stupid face at these things, if she was a "normal" person, the absolute shame of knowing that people know what she's done would stop her. She's got no shame, hence the cringey hair dye post hot on the heels of the CCJ lies. She's just a terminal bleep.

I can't imagine any festivals booking her next year. She isn't worth the hassle.

I've mithered in the past about her lack of shame, because it's fascinating to me. But that was ages ago, when she still had a a decent fanbase / carefully curated army of flying monkeys. Now it's even more glaring - like, how can she consider getting up on stage knowing that people KNOW everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie? I'd rather diiiiieeeee (not literally, Jack ) than face an audience of people who know about my grift, never mind dealing with the organisers and their unspoken opinions. What can she even talk about? Not the poverty, not the VBI, not even her latest book. Even the thought of her getting up on that stage and chatting rit is giving me second hand anxiety, because at this point she really is the emperor with no clothes - at Greenbelt, and everywhere else, she is properly naked. It's the stuff of nightmares.

 

[CrushedIcePlease]

I know this is guest, so normal rules don’t apply but wouldn’t most people be too mortified to show up at an event where they had to release a statement beforehand defending the fact you’re going?!

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

There is a website somewhere of Bukowski experts (a Bukowski society or something) which I came across - they were debating this exact quote and the consensus was that it wasn’t a quote of his. In fact they concluded it was Kinky Friedman.
Typical Jack though. I’d be surprised if she’s actually read any Bukowski, it’s just for appearance.
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Big of them to let some actual Poors in to gaze at the big lights and fancy people. What a treat for them.

Big of them to let some actual Poors in to gaze at the big lights and fancy people. What a treat for them.

If I am among that Happy Band, I promise to point at the magical electrickery things and go "Ooooh!" with wide-eyed wonder.

 

[MoiraRoseIsMyQueen]

I do wonder whether they wrote a statement about her achievements based on her Billy bullshitting, and then when they went to fact check it realised that there’s very little she’s *actually* done Hence the damning with faint praise.

Yeah, I wondered about the "couple of weeks ago" thing too - it suggests that they drafted the statement way back when the initial fuss was being made, and the delay in publishing it was the result of protracted negotiations with Adrian & Jack rather than being ostraching or laziness on Greenbelt's part.

But since this final version still contains a bunch of backhanded compliments... what must the original have been like? If there's been months of wrangling over it, doesn't that suggest that it must have been much more strongly-worded to start with?

And if that's true then maybe there is a chance of further action being taken if there's continued pushback.

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Well, isn't that last the question they need asking?

I think I might renew my NUJ membership....
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Langoustine isn't a fruit?

Langoustine isn't a fruit?

That depends on just how vegan you are.
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Like wither

WASH OUT YOUR MOUTH!

 

[RandomFishOils]

What I want:

1. Pausing the Patreon until she moves to entirely or predominantly digital rewards (higher rate subscribers could maybe get a physical birthday card/copy of her latests book on publication - stuff that can be fulfilled by external agents more easily than a poor smol pixie whose post office hates her). I've posted on here about how she can make patreon work for her in a way that doesn't involve her massively over-promising and failing to deliver.
2. Refunds for everyone who asks.
3. A forensic accountant to go through her income to identify the Sue Lee money and offer those people a direct refund.
4. A full accounting for the teemill debacle.
5. A full and frank apology that lays out, in detail, an accurate timeline from the start of The Pov™ and identifies the Sliding Doors moments - the points where she got so captivated by the beg/pound signs in her eyes that everything started slipping out of control.
6. Separate twitter accounts for her "activism" and her thirst shots
7. all fundraising to only go through legitimate platforms, keep her payPal and patreon for people donating to her personally, not because they think she'll donate it onwards/use it for legal activities.
8. confirmation that her taxes have been paid, in full, (the forensic accountant can assist with this).
9. either for her to actually start doing the work that people think she does. You know - activism, recipes, signposting towards help and support, speaking in parliament, or to step down and stop taking a space away from someone who can speak from lived experience of a life on benefits in precarious housing.

All of guest’s “activism” Twitter accounts:

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I'm pleased to have been mentioned here as a squig on my now deleted Twitter,

I am in AWE!

Me too! It was a proud moment

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Like wither

WASH OUT YOUR MOUTH!

I thought mithering was like dithering 🥲

JUST STOPPIT!
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Mither is pronounced "my-ther" (with a hard "th" like "that there" rather than a soft "th" like "myth").

I have credentials. I will die on this hill.

Thank GOD!

Sanity at last!

 

[Sensible Susan]

Spoiler: It gets worse

Jan 2013. Can you believe this was her actual newspaper column?! Southend Echo has a lot to answer for indulging her in all her nonsensical tit, way before the Guardian came calling View attachment 2283619View attachment 2283614

ETA here also is a very early precursor to ONS changing the way they measure inflation where Jack (writes yet another tedious letter “to the newspaper” in which she) attempts to take all the credit for something that’s duck all to do with her.
View attachment 2283622

So, 'the economy' is the Nazi regime and redundancies at Woolies is the Holocaust? Have I got that right?

 

[House of Carbonara]

And so familiar with quoting/gifs too…makes you think I’ve clocked 32 newbies - unprecedented

32, huh... I lost count around 15 yesterday.
Extraordinary, isn't it, that so many frauen-in-waiting were ready to join, and all so well versed in canal lore (I remember posting little and reading lots at the beginning, especially because I didn't get the canal specific jokes).
Just saying, M'lud.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I’m going to be honest and say Greenbelt sounds as boring as duck. I can’t imagine anyone other than white, middle class, middle England frumps going to that.

Spoiler: You called?

It’s basically going to be an audience of guests, isn’t it?

 

[Domacles]

I’m going to be honest and say Greenbelt sounds as boring as duck. I can’t imagine anyone other than white, middle class, middle England frumps going to that.

Sounds a bit like Hay tbh

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

32, huh... I lost count around 15 yesterday.
Extraordinary, isn't it, that so many frauen-in-waiting were ready to join, and all so well versed in canal lore (I remember posting little and reading lots at the beginning, especially because I didn't get the canal specific jokes).
Just saying, M'lud.

Membership has been closed for a few months and only opened up yesterday or the day before. If people have been reading here during the time they couldn't join, they'll have picked up canal lore and in-jokes during that time.

 

[Domacles]

Spoiler: You called?

It’s basically going to be an audience of guests, isn’t it? View attachment 2283733View attachment 2283734View attachment 2283735View attachment 2283738View attachment 2283739View attachment 2283741View attachment 2283743View attachment 2283745View attachment 2283744View attachment 2283746View attachment 2283747View attachment 2283748View attachment 2283750View attachment 2283752View attachment 2283758View attachment 2283753View attachment 2283754View attachment 2283755View attachment 2283757

So many hairdos and all of them DIRE

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Sounds a bit like Hay tbh

@Domacles is here! Are you the dangling landlord’s behest one?

Or are you the sword of domacles of appeal?

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I'm interested to hear your personal points of view about what guest would have to do to satisfy you that she is truly sorry so she could seek some sort of redemption.
There are multiple reasons why we're all pissed off with her so it would be very difficult.
I've been wracking my brains today trying to think what would satisfy me.
I think that we can safely assume that no-one is going to get any refunds. They should, but she SHAN'T.
For me she'd have to pause Patreon until she can offer some regular digital content instead of physical rewards.
Make her Patreon public like most other providers. That one would definitely give her an upper hand as I think most of the squigs would just shrug and keep throwing money at her.
Any fundraising should be done through a legitimate platform.
A professional Twitter account for signposting/campaigning and a personal one where she can lie, moan about her crumbly shoulder and flash her minge as much as she likes. At least the latter would be for her most avid fans and everyone else could avoid (like any other normal Twitter account).
I popped over to Mastadon to follow someone I know and did a quick search for guest. She is there but there are only a few mirrored Twitter posts with virtually no engagement.

Ideally if i could decide on how Guest should repent it would go like this. I want her to refund her customers and donors. I want her to engage in proper rehab and therapy and start making amends to her family especially her son. She needs to make a public statement with the actual truth and an apology. I would also like to see her engage in volunteer work across different areas (animal welfare, poverty charity but not the TT, disability charity and many more!). I would like to see her admit to label appropriation and make a charity donation to those groups she has manipulated. So vegans, trans people, autism sufferers, arthritis sufferers, BAME organisations, long covid sufferers and many, many more. Finally, she needs to leave the twitter and living in the public eye once and for all and get a different job, which will almost certainly mean training. But all that volunteer work should help with that. Oh, and for the sake of everyone, everywhere, ever, she needs cooking lessons.

 

[Shimmering]

I love how everyone just calls him Shattenstone now. Makes me laugh every time.

 

[markcorriganscrisps]

Membership has been closed for a few months and only opened up yesterday or the day before. If people have been reading here during the time they couldn't join, they'll have picked up canal lore and in-jokes during that time.

Aye, or signed up using their real name in 2020, then lost interest in Tattle for a bit, then had to wait an age to sign back up again because of their own stupidity

 

[MancBee]

Spoiler: You called?

It’s basically going to be an audience of guests, isn’t it? View attachment 2283733View attachment 2283734View attachment 2283735View attachment 2283738View attachment 2283739View attachment 2283741View attachment 2283743View attachment 2283745View attachment 2283744View attachment 2283746View attachment 2283747View attachment 2283748View attachment 2283750View attachment 2283752View attachment 2283758View attachment 2283753View attachment 2283754View attachment 2283755View attachment 2283757

Considering guest has had aesthetic work completed (allegedly) she hasn't aged particularly well.

I'm the least ageist person (at my age I can't afford to be), but if you are going to attempt to defy the aging process by having work done, (and no judgement from me on that score) it should at least make you look better not worse. She looks 10 years older than her actual age.

 

[House of Carbonara]

Spoiler: It gets worse

Jan 2013. Can you believe this was her actual newspaper column?! Southend Echo has a lot to answer for indulging her in all her nonsensical tit, way before the Guardian came calling View attachment 2283619View attachment 2283614

ETA here also is a very early precursor to ONS changing the way they measure inflation where Jack (writes yet another tedious letter “to the newspaper” in which she) attempts to take all the credit for something that’s duck all to do with her.
View attachment 2283622

Cretinous fool. Does she understand why the three companies failed, especially Jessop? (Hint - it happened at the time when buying online started to become popular because it was cheaper. And her a 'photographer' and all).
Get a job, guest. A real one.
Morning/evening, Vali.