Jack Monroe #498 Bootlickcook

[AlwightDallin]

Gawd knows why the Graun keep platforming this fraud but given the horrific cartoon they put out, their judgement is flawed at best in general. Awful rag, thinks it’s a cut above but it’s just a patronising pile of dirge.

JM is still getting torn on the hellsite I see. WHY has someone talented not put this whole sorry saga on as a nice YouTube expose yet, loads of other grifters have been cancelled that way and it’s not like there isn’t loads of evidence.

In other news I found out today the actual Coronation is Saturday. Thought it was Monday. Am on holiday so will find a pub I suppose, it is a historical event. But I’m not having a pov quiche, I’m off for Mexican tapas. Don’t tell Jack or she’ll recommend subbing out the tacos for Pringles and chilli for dried mixed herbs.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Awkwaaaaaard.

View attachment 2139420

How absolutely bleeping gorgeous is Anna Richardson, though? Jack could never.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Can't wait to read Jack's humble brag tweets that her Leninist-Marxist landlord dad pledged allegiance to the King guest - while wearing his medals and saluting the tv the grift 🥹

 

[Boogs]

Daddy get your big cannon out! Time to salute me me me!!! None of us need to think about big Dave’s cannon out and saluting (especially to guest ) Warned!!!

 

[NellieBoo]

Have we not had a TOOT TOOT tweet from guest today?

 

[usefullyuseless]

I'd say big D was WARNED not to bring out any artillery for the coronation after Jack tweeted he fired a cannon* at the jubilee.

*Or a gun. Idfk, all weapons are interchangeable.

 

[camotea]

2nd omg - it’s Patreon payday tomorrow guys for those who celebrate! Or more accurately the start of, update will come on the 2nd once the 24 hours of losses has finished. Would expect to see the first drop ~7am, she opened the month on 456 so anything under that is the net loss she deserves

Oooooh, can’t wait to see your workings, tendersheet x I get a little thrill at the word churn. I don’t fully understand what it means, and it also makes me feel slightly uncomfortable in that context. Am in awe of a mathsfrau though, having struggled to gain L2 in my middle age 🫠

 

[SadieHQ]

After all this quiche chat…I added one to my Deliveroo order today…which they didn’t have, but sent a replacement. Which was…..Lemon Drizzle Cake - I guess all baked goods are interchangeable. Another quiche-less day for me…..

 

[Mr Krabs]

How absolutely bleeping gorgeous is Anna Richardson, though? Jack could never.

Annoying as hell though. I hate how she tries to be the cool auntie of Channel 4 with those stupid naked shows.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Now I’m no social media expert but a 0.1% conversion rate of views to likes is… not great, right?

---

Annoying as hell though. I hate how she tries to be the cool auntie of Channel 4 with those stupid naked shows.

Oh yeah I’d eat Jack’s quiche (lol) before I watched Naked Attraction, but a stunner regardless.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Where are my humiliating trousers?

In other news when are we going to stop talking about quiche I hate it and even the thought of it makes me want to vom.

Babe, same x the flobby, eggy pile of vom.
---

Can't wait to read Jack's humble brag tweets that her Leninist-Marxist landlord dad pledged allegiance to the King - while wearing his medals and saluting the tv 🥹

Oh god they’re going to be doing that pledge allegiance out loud aren’t they?

Spoiler: Republican mither

I’m sorry but if you’re doing the brownie guide Charlie promise thing in front of the telly on Saturday, I think you’re a massive twonk/ a “bad meff” as the scousers say. I love you all, but just know that Big D and Jack will be doing it. That’s the category you’re in.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Babe, same x the flobby, eggy pile of vom.
---

Oh god they’re going to be doing that pledge allegiance out loud aren’t they?

Spoiler: Republican mither

I’m sorry but if you’re doing the brownie guide Charlie promise thing in front of the telly on Saturday, I think you’re a massive twonk/ a “bad meff” as the scousers say. I love you all, but just know that Big D and Jack will be doing it. That’s the category you’re in.

I might pull a mooney instead.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Have we not had a TOOT TOOT tweet from guest today?

No but there have been lots of tweets from other people in the last day or so

Spoiler

All different squigs but I couldn’t be bothered doing different colors beside I am BUSY. None the usual suspects.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Omg bless her the LJC has come prepared to do a runner if she encountered a) guest or b) a near fatal degree of static shock off Linda’s red velour number

2nd omg - it’s Patreon payday tomorrow guys for those who celebrate! Or more accurately the start of, update will come on the 2nd once the 24 hours of losses has finished. Would expect to see the first drop ~7am, she opened the month on 456 so anything under that is the net loss she deserves

Thank you for all you do, HTRIA and don’t pressure yourself to get the figures to us (but also keep doing it coz I’m interested, tyvm)

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Now I’m no social media expert but a 0.1% conversion rate of views to likes is… not great, right?

View attachment 2139553
---


Oh yeah I’d eat Jack’s quiche (lol) before I watched Naked Attraction, but a stunner regardless.

Sorry to quote myself but I obviously meant 0.01% here. Typo but could never again berate Jack for her statistical illiteracy if I got that wrong…

 

[HotesTilaire]

I'd say big D was WARNED not to bring out any artillery for the coronation after Jack tweeted he fired a cannon* at the jubilee.

*Or a gun. Idfk, all weapons are interchangeable.

I think it’s decommissioned WWII heavy artillery. IDK have a look at the Old Army Stuff Museum CIC he’s set up…

 

[pumbilical cord]

the Old Army Stuff Museum CIC he’s set up…

Has he really?!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Has he really?!

Yup
too short
I won‘t link as he’s not the subject of the thread but you can Google it- Shoebury coastal CIC

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I wonder, will Jack’s new “currently undefinable” OH be someone with a million Twitter followers, or a deliciously ordinary human being?

For Jack’s sake, I do hope it’s the former, so that when they inevitably dump her she can at least make some online cash by selling the clothes she wore when she was with them and the soft furnishings upon which she “deliciously fell in love with them”. Life beyond her wildest dreams indeed!

Spoiler: BOAK. WARNED.

PS I can’t stand quiche either. Solidarity, quiche truthers! @FlirtyThirty @Lucy Aeroplane @HotesTilaire and all you others out there who know the TRUTH about that flobby eggy ming!

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

I think it’s decommissioned WWII heavy artillery. IDK have a look at the Old Army Stuff Museum CIC he’s set up…

He could advise that salty allotment burd as shes found it super difficult to do