Why did this sound like it was written to the tune of A Few of My Favourite Things from the Sound of Music?
Puddles and scarves and dads at train stations,
Don't be daft. The internet has seen you playing the piano. Honestly. I've come to the conclusion that anyone who talks to Jack in real life, or rather she talks AT, just mutter a combination of:
I might have completely made this up but I think once upon a time, one of her bestest, best pals softly, gently and peripatically gifted her a baby grand piano for one of the previous RENTED hovels, during THE POVERTY.The piano thing has made me chuckle, coming up with a plausible alibi that weaponises frugality in a gotcha moment against her trolls…
Forgetting entirely that most households don’t also just happen to have a piano laying around
I had to go back to that because I couldn’t quite believe it. Reading the whole recipe and method, I think my eyebrows have now LEFT my face. If you’re feeling fastidious you could, instead of quartering the cherry tomatoes, cut them into EIGHTS. Surely if you were feeling fastidious you’d mix mayonnaise, ketchup, lemon juice and have your own cocktail sauce?Jack's recipe for prawn cocktail is frozen prawns mixed with ready-made, shop-bought seafood sauce
More likely than on a Saturday IYKYK
Couldn't agree more but let's face facts we are the funniest out of all the haterz. If Iqbal came out of his shell I reckon he could give us a run for our money but he hasn't so we are the jokes.Agree and think it’s genuinely quite unpleasant to suggest any one person has been the silver bullet when we’re all v much standing on each other’s shoulders. Every single person here or on Twitter or teheing on slack at the guardian or wherever has contributed in some way whether it’s sharing brand new info, print screens, managed video content, updating the wikis, an iconic joke, making interactive content for our amusement, attracting other dissenters on Twitter, compiling timelines, moderating, leftist shitposting, whatever. It’s been a journey that lots of us have been here for (or lurked - wild to me we’ve got an OG lurker who came out once? Big ups hun x). I don’t care whoever gets credit or clout for unmasking the scammy bitch but I don’t think there’s any need for unpleasantries or whinging from any of the dimensions of the call-Jack-out-o-sphere?
honks like one of her slops... 
As I said this morning, unless Cooper is sighted holding todays paper, i don’t believe it.View attachment 1885879Coops has been deployed. I repeat Coops has been deployed!
...unless she's being tricksy
Clearly behind on her grunking though, I bet a wise frau could even pinpoint the page she's on!
She did tell a story about how SB couldn't wake her up and thought she was dead, a couple of years ago. She seemed to think it was a nice family anecdote (it was a learning opportunity as she quizzed him what he'd do if she wasn't breathing) and loads of the squigs responded, saying 'that's so sweet'. Like you literally thought you were going out of your mind reading their responses because it was clearly so horribly worrying.
WT actual F? We've all seen the appalling video of her stabbing at piano keys with one finger like she's poking holes in a crumpet.
FFS, getting OH's parents to 'chip in' when they're £1 per book. While she's staying at a FANCY air bnb at their expense. She's so cheap.
