Jack Monroe #411 More flounces than an 80s wedding dress.

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I think she might have very briefly (possibly accidentally) deactivated today but can't be sure. I was archiving her page and got the 'something went wrong' message on her page as her tweets wouldn't load, it could just be a general Twitter/archiving glitch but a blink and you'll miss it deactivation isn't impossible.
 
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Whilst it's quiet, let us remember the time that Asda were so scared of Jack they relabelled all their own make stuff as Smart Price and sold it at, if not a loss then significantly reduced profit margins. February was pretty cold, if I remember correctly.
 
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Did they mean jizz?
 
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2 things spring to mind here-
1)That banner is pointless for both the fact of the salient word being obscured and the fact of it not saying much at all anyway. Fair is middle of the road, safe and status quo. Nothing to flick your own bean over.
2) Chiz on tiz makes me want to drop kick a kitten
 
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I apologise in advance for being off topic but I just made the courgette pasta from Stanley Tucci’s recipe (on topic he fully credits who taught him the recipe) and it was fucking epic. I also just costed it. For two, about £5, no tins, no slop, cheap and fantastic, so also on topic there. Just reflecting on previous rage posts I have made, like many others, wondering why JM never mentions or bigs up any other cook / community group despite all the behind the scenes efforts made with damn all to show for it. The last organisation she promoted was Google, from the comfort of her Soho House luxury cabin. Fuckity. That’s the best she can do. Quite glad she has changed the legend on her Twitter profile because the previous one is quite at odds with her stance of things needing to be accessible by all. I know you read this, Jack. Please just stop pretending. People are generally speaking not bastards and you can find a place where you can be happy and not constantly exhausted trying to maintain a status that you know to be bogus.
 
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They're making it funnier by being so po faced about it. I honestly think Jack would be a million times happier if she could laugh at herself but narcs gotta narc.
Isn’t it just people who would snitch to a teacher “I’m telling I saw you smoking at the park and you’ll get a detention and you’re killing yourself AND the planet” except now they’re grown up and, allowed to tweet with impunity. Remarkable.
 
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My husband made savloy sausages tonight. Ive never had them and was reluctant to eat them,because they looked and to quote myself like a dick, 'fucking rank' and like something she would make. Turns out i was right. They were foul. Never again!
 
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It is a truth universally acknowledged that the bigger the Twitter flounce the quicker the return
 
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The EF Benson chat today has given me life! Had an interview this morning for a marginally less stressful job and they said I’d get a call before 5pm and nobody called. Since I fell happily into this canal, every time someone has said ‘tender one’ I think immediately of Tilling and it makes me laugh. So glad to know that other Fraus are taking their performative shopping baskets to Twistevents (sp?) You all make me soooo happy

ETA TwisteVANTS and just had a tiny owl champagne remembering Lucia having to buy veg grown in the garden of Mallards that time she rented it from Mapp. Apologies to mods but if you haven’t read these books you really should, tender ones.
 
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It really is. I'm just astonished my employer hasn't found a way to snap them up, 30% of my colleagues operate like fucking Stasi informers.
 
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Yes, she’s indulged in so much trauma inflation that she’s literally got nowhere else to go. She’s already claimed a variety of highly traumatic experiences, in unusually (for trauma victims) graphic and specific language, to get people off her backs and continue the grift. What worse trauma can she claim next? I’m putting my money on her claiming to have been one of the Chibok kidnapping victims, an ISIS bride or an alien abductee. Yeah, Something like that might work.
 
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There could be several explanations for this. My partners hair went completely white last year, and has mostly gone back to his usual nearly black now. So it’s probably not worth speculating on at length. If she’s covering it via use of products these can be bought quite cheaply now.
The shocking thing for me here is she’s not tried to promote something like using coffee as part of “jacks hacks”
 
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She's been rinsing the juices off kidney beans and soaking her head for 3 hours nightly.
 
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I wonder if Jack knows what sweets or chocolate bar to buy now she hasn't got the twatters to ask? Can she choose which infernal biscuits to bake without a twitter poll? If she is doing these things but can't post every brain fart to the world wide web are they really happening?
 
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