Jack Monroe #399 Catastrophically embarrassing

[whereforartthoupumble]

I have no idea what is going on today but doing my bit to get to #400 before I go to work tomorrow.

Hat day yay!

 

[MoistenedGussets]

Prunes will help you poop tbh

Let's be honest here... Jack's recipes would cause the opposite of constipation... Eating them regular, will make you very very regular.. if you catch my drift..

 

[Justacatindisguise]

No idea who this person is so I don't know what they said, but can you imagine being the employer in this situation? Having some random member of the public contact you to be like "you may not be aware that your employee Jane Smith has been writing sarcastic comments about a marginally famous cookery writer on Twitter, and I wanted to bring this to your attention as I believe such behaviour reflects poorly on the whole of Premier Tax Accounting Firm Limited Inc."? You'd be so bemused.

He asked the OU why they'd got her for that disaster of a talk in Edinburgh.

 

[Mrs Peel]

I nominated this for thread title in the middle of the night:

"Good Lord. The utter narcissism of this obscure cook."

 

[Mr Krabs]

I’m trying to decide what to do with our large expensively acquired over 20+ Years Nigella collection. Her enablement role has put me right off using them and they snoopy me slightly. To lazy to eBay and package. Don’t want to give to charity shop as they are good and buyer may well end up giving her future royalties - it feels a tad wrong but we have a log burner and I’m thinking of going Third Reich.

Really hoping Nige redeems herself. The weather is getting chilly and I fancy a double potato and halloumi bake, but I can’t in good conscience make a mom recipe right now. At least see the light before the holidays. Her tiramisu recipe is a good one to take to gatherings.

 

[MoistenedGussets]

I think she sends messages to the FMs to get them riled up. It's strange how they've been so active today when she has barely tweeted... She's vile

There was a tweets yesterday where she sent a DM to J. Before J LEFT.
I'd say that more than confirms she DMs the Flying Monkey Squad

 

[BooksNCats]

My prediction is that she is going to lie very low on social media for a while to worry her FMs. Very much “I’m running away and you’ll never see me again“.

Except, I don’t think it will have the impact she hopes for. Not after this.

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Ohhhh….. 50 pages. I’m getting excited for my hat.

 

[Just Lou]

No idea who this person is so I don't know what they said, but can you imagine being the employer in this situation? Having some random member of the public contact you to be like "you may not be aware that your employee Jane Smith has been writing sarcastic comments about a marginally famous cookery writer on Twitter, and I wanted to bring this to your attention as I believe such behaviour reflects poorly on the whole of Premier Tax Accounting Firm Limited Inc."? You'd be so bemused.

Depends on the employer and the position within the company I guess. When I worked for an American bank my contract stated that I could be disciplined for anything I wrote on my social media as I could be viewed as representing the company.

 

[kachoochoo]

I love sticky toffee pudding. I would rather never eat it ever again if this was the option. Prunes. Again. Why?
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nice, just casually slip in a mention of your child's bowel movements in the middle of a pudding recipe

did no one edit this tit?!

 

[Menopausal Stormtrooper]

Can we have a run down of hat etiquette for us newer Frau's please?
I'm a bit worried as I've only got the remnants of 5 assorted world book day costumes to work with

 

[Just Lou]

I’m trying to decide what to do with our large expensively acquired over 20+ Years Nigella collection. Her enablement role has put me right off using them and they snoopy me slightly. To lazy to eBay and package. Don’t want to give to charity shop as they are good and buyer may well end up giving her future royalties - it feels a tad wrong but we have a log burner and I’m thinking of going Third Reich.

I'm holding out hope that she's just a little bit naive and doesn't really have the time to investigate properly... Maybe I'm the naive one...

 

[MsGilmore]

No idea who this person is so I don't know what they said, but can you imagine being the employer in this situation? Having some random member of the public contact you to be like "you may not be aware that your employee Jane Smith has been writing sarcastic comments about a marginally famous cookery writer on Twitter, and I wanted to bring this to your attention as I believe such behaviour reflects poorly on the whole of Premier Tax Accounting Firm Limited Inc."? You'd be so bemused.

I’m just imagining trying to explain what a pumble is to my manager!

 

[jenny2603]

My prediction is that she is going to lie very low on social media for a while to worry her FMs. Very much “I’m running away and you’ll never see me again“.

Except, I don’t think it will have the impact she hopes for. Not after this.

I wouldn't put a series of worrying Tweets past her hinting that something very dark is about to happen before she departs Twitter. She's the sort of egotist that wants to attend their own funeral so they can see who is upset. Then she'll pop back up like nothing has happened.

 

[AndrewsDaddy]

Prunes will help you poop tbh

One bad thing Jack does is spread this myth that all food banks will do is give you 12 cans of spaghetti hoops and beans, prunes, sardines, spam, rice pudding. I’m sure a lot of people would be put off. The reality is many (at least the ones I’m involved with) will try to give you a lot of choice and more importantly act as a contact service for referrals to sort out the root cause which is usually debt and/or mistakes in benefits and/or substance abuse. Jack propagates a myth we shove them out the door with a box full of random duplicate tins.

 

[MoistenedGussets]

Can we have a run down of hat etiquette for us newer Frau's please?
I'm a bit worried as I've only got the remnants of 5 assorted world book day costumes to work with

Depends how wealthy you are.

Are you Semi detached with a drive?
Terraced but a eucalyptus tree in the garden?
Terraced but no eucalyptus and a yard?

Semi and drive, I'm afraid we expect specialist hat from a posh shop.

With a eucalyptus tree, an off the rail hat from Bon Marche.

Terraced and no eucalyptus, bit of grass in a baseball cap will do ya.. you're not allowed in anyway so, lovingly and gently, duck off...

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

One bad thing Jack does is spread this myth that all food banks will do is give you 12 cans of spaghetti hoops and beans, prunes, sardines, spam, rice pudding. I’m sure a lot of people would be put off. The reality is many (at least the ones I’m involved with) will try to give you a lot of choice and more importantly act as a contact service for referrals to sort out the root cause which is usually debt and/or mistakes in benefits and/or substance abuse. Jack propagates a myth we shove them out the door with a box full of random duplicate tins.

I remember when Jack made a show of delivering a load of tinned prunes which she got for free from del Monte. How is that a good gift to a food bank at all?

 

[Mr Krabs]

Can we have a run down of hat etiquette for us newer Frau's please?
I'm a bit worried as I've only got the remnants of 5 assorted world book day costumes to work with

Try to avoid hats that have a map of Jack’s home on them, with a hat pin showing its exact location.

 

[BooksNCats]

I wouldn't put a series of worrying Tweets past her hinting that something very dark is about to happen before she departs Twitter. She's the sort of egotist that wants to attend their own funeral so they can see who is upset. Then she'll pop back up like nothing has happened.

Exactly. Designed to stop well-meaning but vocally critical people openly criticising her.

 

[Phillipa78]

Made it to the end of the thread just in time. I know we have grunking, but I refer to this as Indiana Jonesing.

I love how #399 has filled up with the great and the good dissing our smol slop server! Long may it continue. I don't think I can do new threads, but behold my artists impression of a revered Frau at our impending anniversary thread opening;