Jack Monroe #340 Not a professional account

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Just watching the first 5 minutes of Saturday Kitchen, it is joyful, full of banter, wit and laughter. Has me hooked, I really need to get off the sofa and get in with house stuff but it is a really fun watch.
*Jack still hasn’t been invited back right?
** There is talk of a courgette soup recipe…for all those allotment Frau!
 
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I have no technical ability whatsoever but can someone put Jacks face on this?
 
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You just know if the shining was a real thing Jack would say she had it
 
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Good morning Jack; what perfectly ordinary task are you going to solicit praise for today?
This afternoon I prepared myself for the arduous task of trekking to Asda by pulling on my trusty old docs that have been my faithful friends since before the poverty. They were with me when I was clawing and howling at the floor because a door to door salesman came a knocking. They were with me when I sat rocking in the dark because all my unscrewed lightbulbs had been sold for £3k. They were with me whilst I dove deep into bins after a Big Mac when the crushing hunger just became too much for a smol pixie to endure.

Today I sat on the huge spiral staircase in my shitty bungalow and…



tied my own shoelaces. This is something I have been too traumatised to do due to all the devastating trauma flashbacks. Since he was 2 SB has had to tie them for me. Or if I wear them on a day other than a Tuesday Mammy does it for me.
 
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My favourite Ray Davies story is that when they were trying to get signed he suggested his brother would happily sleep with an agent in a Whitnail and I manner and fisticuffs were the result. I realise brothers in bands appear to resort to punching with some regularity but pimpimg out not so much
 
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You just know if the shining was a real thing Jack would say she had it
No I think you will find that she has ~SEVERE~ shining. The severest shining there has ever been. Danny and Abra have nothing on her. She has been stalked since she was in utero by Rose the hat as her ‘steam’ is the steamiest steam there ever was. In fact she needs to hire a team of ex SAS to keep her safe round the clock rattle rattle.
 
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Hi there!!!!

I was already on tattle following a thread about someone else and then a real life friend of mine (and tattler) told me about Jack lying about reading Eastern European cookbooks/being an Eastern European culture/cookery super fan and ultimately recommending some book about Georgian USA cooking. Excuse me while I piss myself all over again.
 
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This is Jack's most recent 'like' ....



It's in response to this



Jack, no one's "projecting", people have legitimate concerns about con artists crowdfunding, and asking for transparency. Sounds familiar? May I suggest that you stop questioning the motives of others and "concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in you and your attitudes.”
 
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Ah yes this must be how acceptance manifests
 
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I might be in the minority, but I think a sobriety tattoo is a ridiculous idea for someone who seems to be constantly teetering on the edge of the wagon.
She maybe thinks ‘if I feel like taking a drink, I’ll just look at my wrist and that’ll stop me”.

But she’s been around AA enough to know that that alone will never work. Ever. Not a hope.
 
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Looking forward to seeing that proof in ~flips through calendar~ never. Sounds like someone on the Russ in Cheshire thread needs to start a list.
 
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Also, GoHenry squig quote tweeted the semi-viral Russ in Cheshire tweet, and the creator of the Russ in Cheshire tweet responded ....



So, I guess that the person who claims 'we' like Jack has no idea that Jack's faving tweets which support Russ in Cheshire and suggesting that people who have a problem with him are just 'projecting'.
 
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I'd always assumed that Russ In Chesire was some kind of parody account, akin to RS Archer.
 
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There really does need to be an investigation into online grifting doesn't there? Kickstarter, Patreon, Gofund etc where the recipient is being loose with the truth about their circumstances, non transparent about how the money is being used (after promising transparency) or not providing what they said they would.
Maybe one of those journalists who spend their time writing about how mean Tattle is might like to look into it.
I'm quite amazed how similar odious Russ is to Jack. Is there handbook somewhere for workshy scammers?
 
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Another collaboration going down like one of Jack's cakes.
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I’m cringing myself inside out here. Why does she do that?! “Guess what guys, I was at Superdrug HQ today for a partnership meeting. But let me tell you allllll about the goat leg I bought and nothing more (other than a brief shakefest on Lorraine in between me telling you all not to buy brands and me telling you all to break your washing machines) about the Superdrug thing!”
 
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