Jack Monroe #340 Not a professional account

[Captainmouse]

BIB 100%.

I can easily find the floor plans online right now because of the enquiry and the reporting afterward. There are some early tweets about it like this guy but there was no confirmation at the time that it was genuine.

I know she's a total narc so I shouldn't bother even trying to work it out, but surely Jack knows that stuff like this is so easily disproven?

If all the other stuff she says about her life is 100% true (which I do not believe, but that's fairly held opinion m'lud), why would she include stories like this that so easily undermine her credibility for seemingly no purpose?

Make it make sense.

Because she gets so giddy with it, she loses all sense of reality. Her tiny smol pixie brain takes off into realms of fantasy. She never knows where the line is till it’s way way back over the horizon

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Maybe there is a grifters WhatsApp group

Aye, and Jack would be the admin

Is it only me that sees A17 and not 417? There is definitely a tail off to the bottom left of the 4, makes it look like a tribute to a boy band. Perhaps she asked for E17 and they couldn't understand her nasal twang?

#outsideitsrainingbutinsideitswet

 

[L3moning]

I'd always assumed that Russ In Chesire was some kind of parody account, akin to RS Archer.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I think we need to stop making fun of the dandelions over the bath as well. All that foliage, and the dirt and mud that drops into the bath clearly bring back happy memories of her time in ‘Nam for a delightful spa-like experience.

 

[Pocahontas]

If she’s being truthful and really has just had it done, then the grey will be the excess ink that is wiped off intermittently in the process of tattooing.

 

[Wooh]

I don’t think content looks that impressed to be honest. I met a puppy earlier who was so excited to meet me that she jumped on my head. Content is thinking when will she stop taking pics so I can go home?

In fairness, my brother has a dog and she lives the most glorious happy, active, family life. She also has resting bored snooty bitch face, such that I often make memes from photos of her to post on the family chat

 

[YenE]

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Ah god she actually believes that will happen?? She is a hoot!

We will never see that recipe anywhere. Ever.

 

[Boogs]

This is Jack's most recent 'like' ....

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It's in response to this

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Jack, no one's "projecting", people have legitimate concerns about con artists crowdfunding, and asking for transparency. Sounds familiar? May I suggest that you stop questioning the motives of others and "concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in you and your attitudes.”

Ah yes this must be how acceptance manifests

 

[moldwarp]

As Lucy-A said too, Jack has never had many friends, and none are long lasting friendships.

Friends, especially during your teenage years, keep shitty traits in check.

I suspect she might’ve been a bit of a mean girl at school. She clearly regards herself as superior in intelligence to all those around her and superiority complexes usually start very early on in life.

 

[instacharlie]

Spoiler: Merail: pet loss

Dear cabal.



I have had to take a step away from Jack recently and, given that this place has been solace during my darkest times, here I return.



Earlier this week, we had our beloved boxer dog put to sleep. She was only 7.



A week and a half ago, she seemed low. Not her usual bouncy, helicopter tailed self. It lasted a few days so we took her to the vet. They couldn’t find any sign of anything wrong - my dog, of course, was all boops and smiles - but decided to take a suite of blood tests later to rule stuff out.



Two days later, we were woken by a clattering sound next door. My dog staggered into our hallway, confused and weak, and dribbling a bit of wee. We ushered her into our bedroom, cradled her while she recovered, and carried her to her favourite spot on the sofa.



Another vet trip, and more bemusement at what was wrong. All the bloods were normal, and we were just waiting for the heart. To rule that out, she was referred to a cardiologist but, in the meantime, we kept her comfy and full of her favourite roast chicken.



These collapses started happening daily. They wiped her out, but when she rallied it was like nothing was wrong. Wowfing with joy when her dad and I snuck a hug; sitting at my feet as I made yet more chicken; running to me with her crocodile ‘teefs’ toy. Friends came over and we presented them with a bag of gifts for their new baby; pup gently reached into the bag and lifted out the stuffed giraffe in her chops. It was for her, right?



Tuesday, cardiologists. She was going to be kept in for a few hours for some scans, an ECG, the works. I kissed her on the head and we headed back home.



Half an hour down the road, we were called back. They’d found something on the scan.



There was a huge mass on her spleen, and there was fluid around her organs. When the fluid was withdrawn for sampling, it was blood. The suspected tumour had ruptured, and was bleeding. Cancer was most likely spreading throughout her body as we spoke.



The vet soberly said we could refer her on for other scans, but she was too weak to travel far. She had that look in her eyes of ‘you know what I’m saying, don’t you’.



We gently got her home. Blanket on the sofa, chicken in the oven. She was snoozing, stirring when we chatted, and very interested when she could smell what was cooking. And we held her paw, and kissed her head, and got a good lungful of popcorn paw.



And at 4.30, we took her to the vet. We explored the fields around there, talked to her, and took her in. She died in my lap, wrapped in her blanket, with her dad and I telling her how good she was and how much we loved her.



Cabal, my heart is broken. I mean, my chest literally hurts. Our house is far too quiet and I don’t know how we’re supposed to live without her (I know we will). We are moving to our first purchased home together in a few weeks and I am devastated that she isn’t with us (I mean, she will be. In a little pot, and in a ring I’ve ordered for myself, and in our hearts). I haven’t cried like this since my Dad died when I was 14.



And I see the tokenistic pictures of Laurie, and I think about Jack ignoring three vets, and I think about the other animals, and I’m furious. Incandescent. Outraged at how unfair it is. Part of pet ownership is putting your pain before theirs; being devoted until the end. They love you unconditionally, and it is the very least you owe them.



I cried when I made tea tonight because she wasn’t by my side waiting for drops. But my pain came before hers; my suffering must prevent any of hers. And that’s just what you do. They are not there for clout, or content. They are family, and you will lay your very heart down for them.

So, so sorry. Boccies really are the best

 

[Captainmouse]

I only found it through a search on here, do you think it should go into the Wiki?

Absolutely!

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Oh hun

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That is a shit ton of fugly cookies but it's not slop for a change.

 

[NellieBoo]

Ooh fellow trained fire warden here, I'm allowed to put a high viz vest on in the event of a fire so the fire fighters know I'm the important one with the clipboard of building plans and personal evacuation plans for each client. Does that mean I have a fire fighting uniform ( not lying, just tricky wording)

Babe, same! I've had to invoke the evacuation plans too during actual building fires.

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Wonder if the work number on the dogs chip is to remind potential bosses she has one.

Not seen her on the telly recently, just sayin.

 

[Orphan_Black]

Well that explains the state of the lawn, I knew one small dog couldn't cover that much ground. Southend Police should be told

To be fair to Jack, all the grass around London is looking in the same state. It's been sunny and roasting hot for days now down South.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Errrr of course Jack's brave, she's literally a firefighter who served in Vietnam

Slopocalypse Now

 

[WTFDidIJustSee]

Ooh I didn't know Patreon was hacked. I wonder if Anonymous accept commissions. Perhaps they'd like to expose the grifters of patreon and social media.

Grunking, but I saw chatter about this on a Sims Creators page And it was heavily suggested that if Patreon were to become a public company, they would have to release all kinds of data about their Patreons, patrons and their tiers…

 

[Ostapbender]

To be fair to Jack, all the grass around London is looking in the same state. It's been sunny and roasting hot for days now down South.

Ah I was joking -- I know it's down to the sun and not p1ss

 

[Dummyfingers]

I just watched Jacks “poetry” video.

I think I’ve given myself osteoarthritis in my toes from excessive curling due to cringe.
Always the penny-pincher, even the embarrassment is second-hand.
Dying

 

[FrumpyCat]

Jack fucks up every job she has because of her massive sense of entitlement and because she simply can’t be arsed to do anything that may take some effort. Why should she? Just her mere existence is enough for people to send cashos so she can sleep all morning and tweet all night.

417 - expectation failure. Jack is literally spelling out what her clients can expect.