Jack Monroe #322 Mr T Roll and the Mitty Bungalow Mystery

[L3moning]

I'm still completely mystified by the Violet Bollocks Impulse - help!
Nothing about it makes sense...
Jack's colleced thousands of shopping receipts from her insane horde of supporters
She will (presumably) tabulate all these in an excel spreadsheet or similar (or possibly some pink Bratz notebooks using glittery gel pens, when her hurty arthritic fingers allow).
She will then be in possession of loads of prices of things from ages ago.
Which will be used to ... do fucking what?

The intent is to prove that the price of "value" ranges of foods have increased by more than the published rate of inflation and, therefore, the "true" rate of inflation is higher for the poorest.

 

[instacharlie]

I can't put the photos side by side, but that is not the same label as is on the bottle reflected in her glasses. The reflected bottle has a white centre and a shaped peak to the shield. There is no gold band on the reflected bottle, the dimensions of the label are all wrong. It has a label on the neck too.

It is not the same bottle.

Can some clever frau put the photos along side each other pretty please?

ETA, the more I look, the more differences I spot. It's like a spot the difference game.

Affligem doesn't have a white covering on the bottle neck either, as the one in the pic looks to have.

 

[sleepingsatellite]

She’s getting better at hiding the Bluetooth remote nowadays. Nice hand tuck.

Perhaps Jack IS her own OH in a Tyler Durden-esque kind of way. Nobody could love Jack the way she loves herself.

there’s always the camera timer

 

[TbilisiPeach]

As a Dutch Frau I am not too worried for her messing with my culinary heritage, as Dutch cuisine isn't particularly refined.

I'm sure she could still fuck it up. It's her one true talent. #rememberDutchBabies

 

[Boogs]

Henry Dimbleby can't stand her. A lot of these food personalities barely tolerate her. They are excellent actors in her presence and know to top up her narc supply but I do wish they'd be more honest and simply refuse to engage at all. Maybe when they experience negative consequences from associating with her, they'll withdraw.

Didn’t she work with him when she was with Allegra? It strikes me as someone indulging her as favour to his friend.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Povs take precautions!
Jack’s in Shawlands

Is this a joke or have you actually seen her?

 

[It’s The Truman Show]

We aren’t wetwipes, we are waterwipes. Small but crucial difference.


Keep going!!!! Rogue I tell you! We’re going rogue.

Jacks away so we are making our own chaos

 

[GoLando]

Listening to LBC recently, I have heard a presenter talk about his weekly shopping checkup. Each week he checks the price of 12 items in a basket. I think he has milk, bread, apples, cheese etc, basically 12 highly bought items.

He has a snazzy name for this item, so snazzy that I can’t remember it! But he just does a weekly check up on how much that basket will cost.

A simple, effective way to cost check the increase in prices. He has been doing it for a while now. Sometimes there is no increase.

This is something Jack could have done, but it would require persistent and consistent effort and there isn’t a lot of rage to be had as sometimes there is no increase!

Sound pretty much like what the ONS do All this reinventing the wheel.

 

[Pavlova]

Why Southern fraus smile?
Jack up North for a while.

(You have our sympathies, but we have thrown you the hot potato and are running away before you can throw it back)

Careful! Big Dave might want that spud as ammo for his bloody gun...

 

[Soapy Dolphin]

I see several of us have already seen this.
Found this interesting. She withdrew her initial allegation and admitted it wasn't true.

Arron Banks loses Russia libel case against Carole Cadwalladr

The Brexit campaigner says he will "likely" appeal against the High Court judgement.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Captainmouse]

Henry Dimbleby ont BBC Breakfast right now talking about free school meals and child poverty right now. Spoke glowingly of Marcus Rashford’s efforts during lockdown. No mention of Jack Monroe so far! How odd, considering how much she boasts about her working with him!

You beat me to it, just coming to say ditto

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

She’s banging on about nothing.

Tattoos, city-adjacent breaks.

Have a kitkat Jack.

I’ll try. Going rogue is messing with my chakras.

Jack Monroe #323 Two mini breaks in two months, what in the Budget Jones's Diary is going on?

New thread everyone. Thread title suggested by @NomDeGuerre and altered for use by @jenny2603 . Recap in shortened form. 1. Jack went away after posting Coops’ Big Mood. 2. Jack reappeared. 3. Jack has been whisked away on a mini break, apparently to the Netherlands (a city-adjacent break no...

tattle.life

new thread everyone (how do I lock this one?)

 

[MistyWindows]

I saw a cack
Where?
There on the stair!

She sang every morning “how lucky I am! Sneaking to Dordrecht
With my Other Hand!”

 

[CabalofBolorneaise]

I have been caught short once or twice when I was younger and I just used alot of toilet roll. Is that maverick, newspaper would cut the floof of ya!

Jack can't possibly claim this because I'd guess almost every woman has done this when caught short, poverty or not. So she had to elevenerife somehow and evidently her mind went to the metro!

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I’ve long suspected “traaazers on a bird” is actually the equivalent of the Home You Go stories at the start of every new school year, where you get an angry parent claiming the headteacher wouldn’t let their daughter wear trousers and it turns out actually the problem wasn’t trousers it was that the little darling wanted to wear trousers that didn’t fit the uniform policy. I can picture Jack wanting to wear her own trousers rather than the uniform ones quite clearly in my head…

So on a flight of whimsy thinking about what trousers she might have wanted to wear, I just softly gently (foolishly) typed ‘Jack Monroe trousers’ into the search bar.

This came up
WHAT. THE ACTUAL. FUCK.

Jack Monroe - in pictures

Loathed by the Daily Mail, admired by most everyone else, Jack Monroe is a powerful new voice in British Food

www.theguardian.com

I’m out for the night at this point (at 430pm here). Off to bleach my eyes and brain and anything else within shaking distance of an ancient bottle of everlasting bottled lemon which I shall be using for aforementioned purposes. Over and out dear ones!

I LIED!!! This (from last year) also came up. Plucky Working Class Vogue-reading-multiple-traaazers-size-wearing pregnant “visually stimulated” fire bird.

“We Should Recognise One Another As Human Beings”: Anti-Poverty Campaigner Jack Monroe On The Realities Of Going Hungry

Chef, author and anti-poverty campaigner Jack Monroe reflects on her own experiences as a struggling mum for Vogue, after the government came under fire once again over free school meals

www.vogue.co.uk

NOW that’s me out!

 

[FunnyFuneral]

Me too dear @heretoreaditall2019

Are all your dinners reeking?
Welcome Jack to Brechin!

Is the lingering honk smelly?
Jack is in Lochgelly!

A saddening odour underneath?
Jack is cooking in Cowdenbeath!

Is the honk far too lingery
Jack get the first bus out of Ballingry!

 

[NellieBoo]

Still nothing cooking from Jack? Thank Gawd for that! I've been BUSY with an actual real life job of work. Imagine that, Jack.

I don't wish to alarm anyone but I wonder if she is doing her tour of the ten poorest areas of the UK for the Vast Bollocks Index?

 

[Stickybeaker33]

I think there is a bearded gent in the reflection. ETA in a cap

 

[Nottonightbabe]

According to the Github, this appears to be the entirety of the VBI so far:

Oh poverty solved then? Hooray!

This page is having a chaos, looks like it's channeling Jack's website

 

[jenny2603]

I meant the effects of her chaos on everyone else. She won't give a fuck about that but she certainly cares about its effects on her.

Ah yes, then we agree.